


Broken - Sanditon Season 2

by MrsH1878



Category: Sanditon (TV 2019), Sanditon - Fandom, Sanditon - Jane Austen
Genre: Gen, Work Contains Fan(s) or Fandom(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:14:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 33
Words: 59,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24001150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsH1878/pseuds/MrsH1878
Summary: A journey of the characters that we have all come to love, and in my imagination this is the journey they would take, I hope that you enjoy this, please feel free to comment or make suggestions.
Relationships: Charlotte Heywood/Sidney Parker, Georgiana Lambe/Arthur Parker, Lord Babington/Esther Denham, Mary Parker/Tom Parker (Sanditon)
Comments: 487
Kudos: 572





	1. Broken

**Author's Note:**

> For my Sanditon Sister/Brotherhood...…. Charlotte and Sidney.....

Sidney - scene 1 

Sidney stared into the fire, a glass of wine on the table and the book in his hand. 

He hoped that tonight would be different, that he would be able to sleep. He resigned himself to the same fate of every other sleepless night he had since she left, every time he closed his eyes even for a second there she was, she was so close he could almost feel her lips again. 

He sighed and opened the book to the only passage he would read over and over again until the sun came up and he could walk to their spot, their clifftop. 

This wasn’t the heartbreak that he felt a decade ago, this was his soul that had been ripped in two and for a brief selfish second, he hoped somewhere she felt like this too, for then at least he would know that it had been real love not the nightmarish hell he felt now. 

He looked down at the passage and began to read…. “ A man cannot step……”

Charlotte - Scene 1 

As she lay in her bed still holding onto her book, Charlotte welcomed sleep as the old friend it had become. Sleep was the place where her heart did not hurt, a place where the emptiness did not feel so suffocating. 

She held her book tight to her, but no tears came, there were none left just a sense that part of her was missing. Her dreams were where she saw him, touched him, argued with him, the place where she felt that anger, he inspired so long ago. 

As her eyelids began to close, her thumb moved across the book title, Heraclitus, as she falls into her sleep she hears her name ……”my dearest Charlotte…..”


	2. Opening Scenes Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter I have included the second part of Sidlotte's opening scene and I have add a couple of others, this is my version a small prologue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well met everyone, I haven't used all the characters as I am new to this type of thing I don't want to have an overload of people just yet so I have just wrote about a few people who I think would be closely affected by what has happened.

SIDNEY PART 2 

Sidney rubbed his eyes, the sun was starting to rise and he could soon escape this house. He still expected to see her in the passageway, attending to the papers of the project, she was everywhere and yet this house was empty, just like he was. 

He decided it was bright enough to leave; he grabbed his coat and left Trafalgar House. He had walked this path every day. It was the only place he wanted to be, the only place that was truly just theirs. He would remember how nervous he was when they wandered here; this was his home if he could not be with her. He reached the spot and looked out to the sea. He closed his eyes, and there she was, looking up at him. He remembered how it felt to hold her in his arms. 

He knew that he would have to leave Sanditon, he would live in London, but his home was somewhere else, not Sanditon but wherever she was, every part of him was there with her. Sidney knew the fight had left him, he did not even have the strength to be angry or sad, he just felt empty and no amount of alcohol, gambling or fighting would ever fill this void. He did however resolve to fix this wretched place, because that is what she would want him to do, otherwise everything the two of them have sacrificed will have been for nothing. If she were here, she would do everything she could to help make it a success. 

He closed his eyes for another second and then wearily turned towards town, Georgiana was calling to see him and he knew that he was about to find out exactly what she thought of him. 

CHARLOTTE PART 2

As they stood on the clifftop, Charlotte closed her eyes and let the breeze wash over her; she stood facing the sea with Sidney behind her and his arms wrapped around her, holding her close so that her head rested against his chest. She wanted to stay in this moment forever; it was just the two of them, no fire, no money worries, nothing. “Charlotte, my dearest Charlotte” he whispered, I would stay here for the rest of my days but you need to do as I have asked.” She answered in a soft voice “I can’t”. 

“Do you remember what I told Georgiana? Put them from your mind, or you will go mad”. Charlotte turned to look at him, she searched his face, she wanted to remember every line, his dark eyes, his lips. He leant towards her and kissed her softly, she reacted to him and he pulled her close, this is where she belonged, this was home. 

He released her from their embrace, repeating the words again “put me from your mind, or you will go mad, promise me Charlotte” He began to walk away, moving further and further from her, she called out to him but he was disappearing. Suddenly it became cold, she continued to call his name, SIDNEY, SIDNEY, tears streaming down her face, she needed to find him. Charlotte heard her name being called; she was desperately trying to find the voice. “CHARLOTTE” the voice roared, and Charlotte woke with a start. She opened her eyes and her mother was looking down at her “my dear girl, what is it” Charlotte looked confused; her mother looked stricken and was holding her by the shoulders. “You were shouting and crying, calling out. Is this why you have been so quiet since your return?” Charlotte felt like she couldn’t speak, a lump formed in her throat, she looked at her mother she wanted to tell her, but instead she just clung to her and sobbed, she felt the whole weight of it all coming from her. This was her madness and he was right she needed to put him from her mind but at this moment she just wanted her mother to hold her whilst she cried as she finally let Sidney go. 

Lord & Lady Babbington – Opening of Season 2

As the door swung open, Esther looked up from the letter she was reading, “Lord Babington” she said with a straight face but eyes that welcomed the very sight of him. “Lady Babington” he said as he bowed his head.

“What news from Sanditon?” she asked; Babington had a look of worry about him. “It’s Sidney, I’ve never seen a man so broken” he said sadly.

“Mrs Campion can have that effect” replied Esther who disliked that woman to her very core. Babber’s laughed, he so very loved the wittiest woman he had ever met.   
“I tried to bring him back to London, but he refused. I fear that if he stays in Sanditon he will never have a moment’s peace or even a simple night’s sleep. I am worried Esther”.

Esther looked up at her husband, a man she once perceived as shallow. She loved how he protected those he loved and cared about, she loved the trust he had in her and her in him, simply, she loved him.

She straightened herself up, “Well Lord Babington, it seems a return to Sanditon is in order”. Babbers watched as his wife left the room and suddenly, he felt like something was a foot, no doubt he would find out soon, his wife did not play petty games. 

Georgiana – Opening of Season 2

It had been a week since she had seen Sidney, escorted by Mrs Griffiths Georgiana walked towards Trafalgar House she knew exactly what she would say to him, that he had broken her friend’s heart, and that she had been right, he couldn’t be trusted. She was furious and she intended to tell him just that.   
Georgiana walked into the large office full of rage. The sight of him winded her, surrounded by papers, head in his hands, he looked up and smiled weakly, the man before her was bereft, like a death had taken place. 

She knew that feeling and with her anger subsiding she sat facing him and quietly said…” You fool, you should have come to me for the money”….

He sighed, “that is your money, for your future life, I will not betray your father by using it to help rescue my inept brother”. 

“Exactly, it’s my money and I should be able to say what happens to it. Just take it, I have no need for it, its sometimes like a weight on my shoulders” Sidney smiled at her, he knew he was referring to the event in London, but he would not take advantage of his ward. “No Georgiana, that is the end of the conversation”. He leaned back, she could see that he hadn’t slept, at all by the looks of it. She expected to see him at least angry, stomping around as he usually did. Before her was a man who was barely breathing. 

Mary – Opening of Season 2

Mary walked slowly to take her post. It was hard to be around Tom at the moment, she was so very angry at him but more so with herself. 

Every time she saw Sidney, the emptiness in his eyes she felt guilty. She should have told Tom earlier of the connection she saw between Charlotte and Sidney but she wasn’t sure if it would have made a difference, Tom was so obsessed with this town, the beau monde she doubted he would have stopped Sidney even if he could have. 

Mary looked at the letter in her hands, she was careful not to mention his name or the fact that he was barely surviving, that she heard him wander around the house in the middle of the night or that she would find him in places that she knew reminded him of her. For Mary knew that the place where this letter was to be delivered, there was another lost soul in the same agony as the one she saw every day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have written a few other scenes and I am working on weaving it all together, I do have an end game and a proposal scene in my head!!! 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed it and again any comments, tips, suggestions are always welcome to this novice!!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for such a long break away, to be honest I was so blown away by response that the truth is I got cold feet, as its my first time writing I had a mental block and worries that the story would not live up to the chapters I had already submitted. Well, I have decided to continue with it and if anything it will be an exercise that I can learn from. I promise the chapters will come quicker now, i have Chapters 4 and 5 also, just tidying them up. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

Chapter 3 

The Babington’s 

Esther began a letter to her Aunt informing her that she and Lord Babington would be in Sanditon by weeks’ end and they would be delighted if she would allow them to reside with her during their stay. She needed to see her Aunt in person to put her plan in to action. 

Esther began her second letter;

Dear Miss Heywood, 

I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing to request a favour from you. Further to the incidents that happened following the ball and myself newly married I would be grateful if you would consider returning to Sanditon to stay with my Aunt and oversee her investment in the project. As you are aware my Aunt has a low opinion of Mr Tom Parker and is still unsure as to whether he can keep his promises of completion. 

I know that you were involved in some parts of the project and have knowledge of the buildings and finances. 

I do know as to the reasons that you left at the end of summer and I will of course understand should you wish to remain at your family home.

I do hope that this is not the case.

Your friend  
Lady Esther Babington

Esther had not discussed any of the business pertaining to Miss Heywood to Lady Denham in her letter but she would have Babington help convince her Aunt, he has always had a way with her. 

Lord Babington entered the room, “so my dear, are you ready to tell me your plan”. 

“I need you to help convince Lady Denham that she needs to have Charlotte Heywood reside with her this winter”... Babington stood there; open mouthed “Are you mad? Do you know what having her there will do to Sidney, I will not do this to him Esther, and I will not be part of making my friend more miserable than he already is”. 

Esther sighed irritably, “This is not an exercise to punish or provoke Parker, I simply want Charlotte to reside with Lady Denham over the winter months and she has in depth knowledge about the project”. 

“Whatever you think will happen Esther it will not, he cannot break with Eliza you know this. You are just submitting them both to more heartache.” 

Esther looked at Babington “Leave Mrs Campion to me” she said smiling. 

Then she kissed her husband. She knew how much Sidney’s friendship meant to him and when he was in a position to help her, he had defiantly stood beside her and resolutely refused to be moved. She knew that she could depend on him for the rest of her life; this was her way of saying thank you the only way she knew how. 

“Now, please leave me, I have more letters to write and you are quite distracting Lord Babington” Esther said as walked back to her desk. 

Sidney Part 3 

Georgiana stayed for tea and before she left she warned Sidney that their conversation was over…for now. He rubbed his face, tired, he needed to speak to Mr Stringer, oversee the cost for the rebuild and the timeline of the work to be done. 

This made him think of Eliza he realised that he would have to write to her and inform her that he would be staying in Sanditon for the winter, he would have to invite her here. He had meant to return to London following the announcement but when Charlotte left he couldn’t bear to leave, he kept telling himself just one more day and then Mr Stringer of all people had given him the perfect excuse.

James Stringer was a decent man, and honest. He spoke with him following the fire and he had agreed to stay on with a condition that he dealt only with Sidney. He knew he should have been shocked at the impertinence of Mr Stringer with regards to Tom but even Sidney could not argue that the workers had no trust in his brother. 

Sidney sat at his desk and began to write his letter….”Dear Eliza”…

Charlotte Part 3 

Wandering back across the fields to her house, Charlotte realised that as much as she missed Sidney she also missed the town of Sanditon itself. She missed her daily talks with Georgiana, the company of Mary and the children. She also missed having a purpose; she enjoyed her small role in the project. 

As she approached the house, Alison came running to greet her. There is a letter for you, it’s from London. “It’s most likely to be Lady Susan; I had informed her I was to return home.” Charlotte was surprised when her mother handed her the letter, it had the Babington seal. Charlotte sat and read her letter. 

“Is everything all right Charlotte?” her mother asked, 

“Yes, well Esther, I mean Lady Babington has written to ask a favour of me, she has asked that I come and stay with Lady Denham over the winter months.” Charlotte replied, still a little stunned. 

Charlotte read the letter a few more times, trying to decide how she felt about Esther’s offer. Part of her didn’t want to return, the risk of seeing Sidney made Charlotte anxious, and she had been trying her hardest to not think about him. Yet Charlotte had enjoyed her role in the project, she enjoyed her somewhat independence. She knew she would have to convince her mother and father to let her leave again so soon. 

After Charlotte helped her mother put the younger children to bed after their supper, she approached her mother and father, “I would like to fulfil the request that Esther made to me in her letter, and I would like to be a companion to Lady Denham.”

Her parents looked at one another, “You have just returned to us my dear child, surely you do not wish to leave us so soon?” her father said. Her mother remained quiet, observing her. 

“Of course not Papa and I missed you all when I was away but in truth I miss my time in Sanditon, I was helpful and useful in many ways, I enjoyed my independence, I miss it very much.”

“Well, I suppose we would not be able to keep you here forever once you had your first taste of adventure. Charlotte you are a wise girl and I trust that if you feel this is something you want to do then I am quite unable to say no. “Her father said lovingly. He kissed her on the head and said goodnight. 

Her mother was silent throughout and when her father had gone to bed, she began to speak “I do not think you should go Charlotte, whilst you will not tell me all that happened whilst you were away I know a broken heart when I see one.”

Charlotte looked at her mother, “Yes, I did meet someone however it was not meant to be, nothing more than a first crush Mama not a broken heart. I assure you that I am fine.”

There was something very cold in Charlottes eyes noticed her mother, like a door that was firmly shut, now was not the time to press. She trusted her daughter, however she knew that Charlottes pain did not come from a crush, but for the first time since she had returned home Charlotte seemed happy. 

“Charlotte, if you feel that this is the best course for you then I trust your judgement child and you have my consent also” her mother said although somewhat apprehensively. 

Charlotte kissed her mother and set to writing a reply to Esther. It was the first time she had been excited since she returned home. Charlotte also wrote to Mary and Georgiana. 

For a brief moment she allowed herself to think about Sidney, and like a wound freshly cut, the smallest thought about him hurt her heart. There had been no mention of him in the letters from Mary or Georgiana, she was sure that he was now in London and if he returned for a visit she could make sure that she did not see him. Charlotte felt happy for the first time, she could return to see her friends and the town that she had come to love. 

Georgiana Part 2

A few days later Georgiana read Charlotte’s letter, she could not believe it her friend was to return, at no less than Lady Babington’s request, although there would be nothing to tempt her to stay with Lady Denham, I’d rather swim back to Antigua thought Georgiana. 

Since her initial visit to see Sidney, and her shock at what she had found, Georgiana had ensured that she visited the Parker house every day. Sidney worried her, he seemed so desolate and whilst Georgiana still held some contempt with regards to his manner towards Otis, for the first time she felt pity towards him. The pain of heartbreak is bad enough but what he seemed to be going through was worse.

What shocked Georgiana even more that on her daily visit Sidney always made time for her, they had tea, he would fill her in about Mr Stringer’s ideas and plans for the town. They seemed to be becoming friends which if you had asked her some weeks ago was an absurd notion. 

Of course she was excited to see her friend again but Georgiana was unsure whether Charlotte knew that Sidney was still here, this was not going to turn out well for either of them. 

Georgiana decided she would have to go and see Sidney. There wasn’t any time to send a letter to Charlotte before she arrived but she could warn at least one of them. As she was about to leave when Mrs Griffiths called her…

“Georgiana, Lady Babington is here to see you”. 

“Me, what does she want with me” asked a surprised Georgiana as she walked into the sitting room. There was Esther Babington sitting waiting for her,

“Good day Miss Lambe, I see that you are about to leave but I would be grateful if I could impose on your time a little?” said Esther with a slight smile. “Thank you Mrs Griffiths, I can assure you Miss Lambe is quite safe with me” – Mrs Griffiths knew she was being dismissed. 

“How can I help you Lady Babington?” 

“As I am sure you have now been informed that Charlotte Heywood is to return, well she comes at my request, as I am also sure that you know what transpired between her and your guardian. To speak frankly Miss Lambe I am here to make you a proposition and ask for your help?”

“My help with what? “Asked Georgiana suspiciously. 

“I think we should ask Mrs Griffiths for some tea, this may take a little time”

After Lady Babington left, Georgiana sat a little stunned, it seems she was to play a part in somehow ensuring Sidney doesn’t marry that odious woman and save this town. She had promised Esther she would not breathe a word of this plan to Sidney but she should warn him that Charlotte is to return.

Georgiana grabbed her bonnet and made her way to Trafalgar House, she was not looking forward to the next conversation. 

Mary Part 2 

Mary was returning to Trafalgar House when she encountered Georgiana, Mary was pleased that she had been spending time with Sidney at the house and in turn with her and the children who seemed to love her. 

“Georgiana, you look a little downcast, are you alright?” Mary asked. 

“Have you heard from Charlotte recently? I had a letter from her this morning and I need to speak with Sidney”. Georgianna said sadly. 

“I have not yet looked through my morning letters, is everything alright?” Mary asked worriedly. 

“It seems that Charlotte is returning, and I think Sidney should know, it is hard enough watching him now, I have no idea how he will react”. 

Mary was shocked; she did not expect Charlotte to return so soon. She would be very happy to see her friend but the state of Sidney at the moment Mary wasn’t sure if Sidney could take being so close to Charlotte.  
“Come in Georgiana, but I’m sure that Sidney is with Mr Stringer, he goes out early most mornings so I don’t expect him to be back as of yet, if you would like I could tell him “.

Mary could see the look of relief on Georgiana’s face, “Yes please” she responded, Mary was pleased that her and Sidney seemed to get along better. 

Mary entered the house, it seemed quiet which she was glad of, she walked to where her letters were placed and saw a familiar handwriting, Charlotte had written to inform her also that she would be returning but at Lady Babington’s request and to help with Lady Denham. 

At that moment she heard Tom calling her name, “Mary, my dear is that you? I have some new ideas and I wish to share them with you”. Mary sighed, she was in no mood for another of Tom’s new ideas, and she was amazed that a man who could envision a town to rival Brighton could not see what was happening within his own family.

“Yes Tom, but I am going out again shortly I’m afraid, I have some business to attend to”. As she said this Mary looked at the letter, “Charlotte is to return to Sanditon it seems, very soon. She has been asked by Lady Babington”. 

“I’m glad for you Mary, you have been very forlorn she Charlotte left and I am sure once she is back you spirit will return, and now we can discuss my ideas and plans.” Tom said completely oblivious to his wife. 

Mary stood there for a moment, she looked at Tom, she loved him very much but at this moment she did not like him. 

“The reason for my low spirits as you say is you Tom, you, this town and the whole sad mess.” Marys eyes welled up, she grip her hands tightly. 

“I, I don’t understand my dear….” Tom stammered..

“That’s the problem Tom, you understand nothing that does not include this town, you are so blind to those around you, you squandered money, you lied to the workers, you embarrassed this family and then the fire, how could you have been so stupid Tom? And now you stand here talking about ideas with money that is not your own but one that your own brother had to sell himself for. At this moment in time I find myself in agreement with Lady Denham, you are a despicable man at times”. 

Tom stood there looking at his wife, he had never seen her so angry, “My dear, what do you mean, Sidney has not sold himself, he has found his lost love, and with that he has saved Sanditon”. 

Mary shouted louder than she thought possible, “Sanditon, Sanditon I am so sick of hearing about this town, have you any idea exactly what Sidney has sacrificed for you not this town YOU!!! Have you not seen the state of him, he hasn’t slept, he barely eats, if you ask me it’s lucky he is standing, all this because you risked everything and now he has lost everything that means something to him and Charlotte is returning and they both have to live through that agony again”. 

“Mary, please calm down, Sidney loves Eliza, the small flirtation with Charlotte, it did not….” Tom stopped talking when she saw Mary’s face

“YOU KNEW……. “Mary had to steady herself, she couldn’t believe it, surely not, Tom wouldn’t, he would never, 

“I , I , I thought I saw something at the London ball and then Eliza arrived and Sidney seemed happy again, and then again at the Midsummer ball but the fire, and then Sidney came back from London with his news and Mary I was so relieved, Sidney has loved Eliza for a decade, surely you do not think that Sidney and Charlotte had a connection as strong. 

“How could you, you heard and saw nothing after Sidney came back from London only your own selfish wants and needs, you saw the money and whatever else be dammed. Well you have dammed your brother and the worse thing is I don’t believe you care about that as long as the money still comes in for your precious town…”

Mary had never spoken to Tom like this, “Well Mary, you did not mention any of this to me, if had you discussed it….”.

“What Tom, what would it have done, would it have changed your mind? Or would you still have let Sidney sacrifice everything. You are right I should have discussed this with you, I should have stopped Sidney the moment he told us, but the difference between you and I Tom is that I will feel guilty for the rest of my life, but you, as long as Sanditon rises from the ashes Tom Parker will be ok.” 

With that Mary left, she couldn’t stand to look at Tom for a moment longer, not only was Charlotte and Sidney’s lives ruined but she couldn’t help but feel that her own marriage was on the way to ruin also.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of angst in this one. 
> 
> Let me know any comments you have.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI Everyone, thank you so much for your comments and kudos. I am doing my best to thank everyone that has made a comment. 
> 
> So the pieces are all moving, people are starting to arrive.......

Babingtons Part 3 

A few days later, Esther arrived at Sanditon House, her Aunt greeted them “Esther, my dear, you look unwell, what is a matter with you!” Esther rolled her eyes at her husband who was greeted with much enthusiasm, “Lord Babington, how lovely it is to see you, although I am surprised, I would be sure that you had business that would keep you in town” 

“I am happy to put any business aside Lady Denham to see you”. Babington looked at his wife with a smile.

“Well come sit and tell me why you are here, and the truth please, you are newlyweds and yet you ask to come and stay with an old woman, I think not, so come out with you!”, Lady Denham was perched on her chair waiting for an explanation. 

“Aunt, I have asked Charlotte Heywood to return and to stay with you “

“You have done what! Am I such an invalid that I need constant watching, no, I will not have it? What of Miss Heywood, she has returned to her village, I cannot believe Esther that you would make such an invitation on my behalf!”. Said Lady Denham.

“Aunt, I believe that Charlotte can be a great help to our family at this time, she has intimate knowledge of the project therefore she can speak with Mr Tom Parker on your behalf, and you need a more constant companion since your illness.” 

Lady Denham made some huffing noises, and did not seem convinced by Esther’s argument. 

Well then, Miss Heywood will arrive in 2 days’ time and I have asked Miss Lambe to join us for lunch tomorrow along with Mrs Parker.” 

“Esther, what are you up??” Lady Denham asked, quite sure that this had nothing to do with her previous ill health or animosity towards the Parker family. 

“I promise you that I will explain everything, but now I must unpack and rest, I am feeling quite sick.” Esther said. 

Babington escorted Esther back to their room, “Well done my dear, it seems you did not need my help after all, I think you underestimate yourself sometimes Esther.” 

“Hmmm, well now I need your assistance, I have two notes, one each for Miss Lambe and Mrs Parker, would you be able to deliver them when you go to see Parker please my love.” Esther said as she shut her eyes and tried to sleep. Babington kissed her on the forehead and left to head to town. He needed to see Sidney, he felt he should know that Miss Heywood was to return but he still felt uneasy keeping Esther’s plan from him. She was right of course he would never agree but Esther was convinced that they could help him out of this whole sorry situation. 

Sidney Part 4

Sidney was sitting at his desk when Lord Babington made his way into the study; he leaped up to greet him. “I did not know that you were coming for a visit, is Esther with you? “

“Yes, she is with Lady Denham at the moment, Sidney, there is something, I have to tell you.” Babington said. 

“Well, what is it? “ Sidney asked.

“Miss Heywood is returning to town at Esther’s request to help Lady Denham and with the rebuild. Im sorry Sidney, I tried to stop her but you know what Esther’s like, it would be easier to stop an army singlehandedly.”

Sidney just stood there, unable to speak. He turned and walked back to his chair, “When does she arrive?” he asked. 

“2 days’ time, she will be staying with us. Will you be ok?”

Sidney nodded, “Yes, well Mrs Campion is also due to arrive soon, so there’s that “Both men stood there looking at one another, Sidney was quite shocked when Babington let out an enormous laugh. 

“I say man; of all the times to laugh this is not one of them.” 

Babington continued, “Oh my dear fellow, never did I think we would spend our days avoiding women.” Sidney looked at him and shook his head. 

“I didn’t think I would see her again.” Sidney said quietly. 

Babington walked to the desk, he rested his hand on Sidney’s shoulder, “Have faith old friend, you never can predict the future.”

“Mine is quite clearly laid before me; I just hope she finds happiness. She deserves that at the very least for what I have put her through”. 

“Sidney, you need to stop punishing yourself, you did what any decent brother would do……... you’re a good man Sidney, I wish you could see that”. And with that Babington nodded and left. 

Sidney could not believe it, she was coming back, he would see her. Knowing the pain, it would bring, he couldn’t help but feel happy. He longed to see that smile, those beautiful eyes again. He wondered if she knew he was still here. Would she speak with him? Would she be pleased with his efforts? Would she still care for him? He knew it was selfish to think this. He had forfeited every right to her feelings but nonetheless he wanted, no in fact he needed her to think well of him. 

Georgiana Part 3

Georgiana was restless, she had not heard from Mary or Sidney since her last encounter with Mary. She wondered how Sidney took the news, he’s probably drunk in the saloon she thought. With that a knock at the door and the sound of Mrs Griffiths’ over the top greeting, Georgiana knew Sidney had come. 

“Georgiana, Mr Sidney has come to see you”. 

“I see that, thank you.” Georgiana said as she walked towards the table, “Tea Sidney?”. 

“Yes please, thank you Mrs Griffiths but I wish to speak with my ward in private.” Sidney took the tea and sat down. “Do you know Charlotte is to return? He asked gently. 

“Yes, she wrote to me, I came to tell you but you were with Mr Stringer so Mary said she would tell you”. Georgiana was searching his face for any sign of how he felt about it. 

“I have not seen Mary, Lord Babington came to see me”. 

Sidney paused for a second. “Georgiana, these past few weeks have been a comfort to me. I feel that we are beginning to become friends and I hope that can continue. I can never make up for not being there for you but I do want to make amends. I would like so very much for us to be friends”. 

Georgiana sat there in silence, a short time ago such a speech would have had her shouting at him, yet in a small part she agreed with him. They had begun to break the ice between them. Georgiana was unsure they could ever repair the past but he seemed so willing to try.

“When you are married, what happens to me? I cannot see that Mrs Campion would want me around”. Georgiana looked into her cup as she said this. 

“What would you like to do?” Sidney asked surprisingly 

Georgiana was not expecting that answer, he never seemed to let her make any decisions for herself. She was sure this was some sort of trap. 

“Georgiana, I would like you to come and live with me in London, but I know that it not something you would find agreeable. So therefore it is not unthinkable that you have some ideas as to where you reside.” 

At this point Georgiana was convinced Sidney has been drinking! “I have not given it any thought as I did not think you cared for my opinion. May I have some time?” she asked shyly. 

“Of course, there is no rush. Now did I tell you about an idea Mr Stringer has had that he tells me came from a conversation with you.”.

Sidney’s visit lasted for around an hour. He seemed interested in the views she had given Mr Stringer. He listened to her, even managed to laugh once or twice. Georgiana resolved that if Sidney was to try then the least she could do was to let him. With Charlotte about to arrive, he could do with all the friends he can get. 

Mary Part 3

Since their fight Mary had barely spoken to Tom, only in front of the children or company did she invite him into conversation otherwise at this moment she was glad of the peace. 

She had been invited to Lady Denham’s tomorrow for lunch along with Georgiana which for a moment Mary thought was strange. Lady Denham had not been silent about her dislikes of both her and Georgiana. 

Mary was about to leave when Tom entered the room, “Are you going out my dear?” Tom asked sheepishly. 

“Yes, and tomorrow Georgiana and I have been invited to Sanditon House for luncheon, I am unsure why we have been asked but I must go, it wouldn’t do to antagonise Lady Denham any further.” Mary said this pointedly in Toms direction. 

Tom approached Mary, “Mary, I would very much like us to discuss things. I do not like this hostility between us.” 

Mary looked at her husband, she knew he was not entirely to blame but she wasn’t ready to forgive him not for everything else he had put them through. “We will talk Tom, but not now. I have no words other than ones I have already spoken to you.” 

Mary grabbed her bonnet and headed out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it.


	5. Chapter 5

Charlotte Part 4

As Charlotte walked through the fields back towards her home, tomorrow she would leave for Sanditon, she would see her friends again. She tried hard to concentrate on the happy reasons as to why she was returning. 

Charlotte hoped that her letters had reached Mary and Georgiana; In her mind she had never thought she would be back in Sanditon especially after… after her heart was broken. 

Tears welled in Charlotte’s eyes, her heart was broken, their time together was so brief but their pull to each other was undeniable. As she sat down she let her head fall back and closed her eyes, was she ever to be free of this pain? She wondered if he felt the same, he had told her that it wasn’t Mrs Campion that he loved but she knew she had been right to stop him there. One more word and she would have told him everything that was in her heart and refused to leave but that would not have helped either of them. 

Babingtons Part 4

Esther entered the large drawing room and found Lady Denham looking out of the window.

“Good morning Aunt, are you well?” she asked 

“I am not an invalid. I want you tell me why you have arranged for Miss Heywood to stay in my home and why I am to entertain Mrs Parker and Miss Lambe, the truth please Esther”. Said Lady Denham. 

Esther sighed, unsure whether her Aunt would wish to go along with their little plan she said..

“I believe due to Mr Tom Parker’s stupidity and vanity he has placed this town in jeopardy along with your investment, I am simply ensuring your return and I feel that Miss Heywood can help with that”. 

“But why Miss Heywood, I do not believe she is a Captain of industry or am I mistaken, what role has Miss Heywood played in this town? She is nothing more than a visitor, no Esther I cannot see why you would suggest such a thing?”. 

“Because no one in this town has given more than Charlotte Heywood and Sidney Parker!” she said. “The only reason that Tom Parker is not in the debtors prison is because of his brother’s sacrifice to ensure that his family is not in danger, he is not marrying for love this is a business transaction and one that he will regret for the rest of his life”.

“What does this have to do with Miss Heywood?”

“To be frank Lady Denham they are in love with one another, I believe Sidney was to ask her to marry him but the fire happened and he tried everything he could but Mrs Campion was the only solution”. 

“Why are you trying to help them Esther”? Lady Denham asked softly. 

“Because, well because of Babington, he is so worried about his friend and if I can help him I will as he has helped me. Secondly, well that’s my own business”. 

Esther stood with her chin in the air, she hadn’t realised that there was another reason until Lady Denham asked her. 

“And how to you suppose we now deal with this Mrs Campion and her investment” asked Lady Denham.

“Well that’s where Miss Lambe comes in … she might well be the saviour in this whole thing”. 

Georgiana Part 4 / Mary Part 4 

Mary gathered the children together to wish their father goodbye before she saw them to the school. 

“What time shall you return today my dear?” Tom asked. 

“I have luncheon with Lady Denham and Lady Babington, I shall see the children to school and call on Georgiana to walk together. I am unsure as to when I will return. Goodbye Tom.”

With that Mary hurried the children out of the door, they asked if they could call on Georgiana to walk with them to school. Mary smiled; she was enjoying seeing the children with Georgiana and hoped that it made Georgiana feel less alone. 

The children knocked on the door and moments later Georgiana appeared. 

“Oh no smelly children, I may have to run all the way to the school, do you think you can catch me?” she laughed as she bounded off towards the school with Mary walking in their wake. 

Once the children were settled Mary and Georgiana walked towards Sanditon House. 

“I wonder what Lady Denham wants, I have no wish to be scolded for the faults of my husband today” said Mary bitterly. 

“Lady Babington came to see me, she mentioned a plan she has to try and help Sidney out of this mess but I don’t think it can work. She would never break with Sidney, he is her prize and i can't see a way that he will ever agree to it”. Georgiana said. 

Charlotte Part 5 

Charlotte bid her family farewell and set off to meet her carriage to Sandition. 

She was looking forward to seeing Georgiana, Mary and the children. She had missed the sound of the sea air, the view from the cliffs to the open sea. Charlotte was sure Sidney would be in London, I cannot imagine Mrs Campion would like to live in Sanditon she thought. 

Charlotte was nervous at being a guest of Lady Denham’s, she was still unsure as to why Esther asked her. Lady Denham had never showed Charlotte any particular kindness or friendship, the whole request had seemed strange at first but Charlotte couldn’t escape the exciting thoughts of being back there again. 

She knew it was going to be hard at first, everywhere will remind her of him but she was resolved to their situation and therefore nothing more to be done.


	6. Chapter 6

The Luncheon 

Mary and Georgiana were welcomed in to the large drawing room, Esther rose to greet them, "Thank you both for coming, please sit down we have much to discuss”. 

“Lady Denham” said both Georgiana and Mary. 

“Well Mrs Parker, how is your husband fairing now he has the promise of money from his brothers upcoming betrothal”. Lady Denham asked pointedly. 

“I am sure my husband feels very fortunate and lucky Lady Denham”. Mary said, trying not to rise to the bait of another argument. 

Esther, realising that her Aunt was about to launch into a tirade about Tom Parker, she spoke, "I have asked you both here today for your help. Miss Lambe I do believe that you are in a financial situation that could help Sidney and if I am correct he is reluctant to let you use your fortune?” 

“Reluctant is too nice a word Lady Babington, if I bring this subject up again I am sure he will lock me in my room. I went to him after Charlotte had left and told him that he should have come to me, but it was too late he had already promised himself to that woman and the truth is he would never ask me”. Georgiana said sadly. 

“Yes well, we will have to try to change his mind, that’s where you come in Mrs Parker!”. 

Mary looked up from her cup, surprised.

“Me, ….. I can assure you that Sidney will not listen to me on such matters”. 

Esther looked at Mary Parker, she was a quiet woman, steadfast at her husband side but yet from her tone to Lady Denham’s question it seems all may not be well. 

“Mrs Parker, you are aware of the sacrifice that Sidney has made in securing that you and your family do not end up in the poor house,, whilst I do not think, Mrs Parker that you had a hand in your husband’s designs I do however think that you opinion is important to Sidney, so therefore I need you along with myself, Babington and Georgiana convince Sidney that Georgiana would be the better investor and to talk to your husband about his recent behaviour. “

“Well, well, I’m not sure he will listen to me on this subject, and Lady Babington if we are successful then how are we to break his engagement, Mrs Campion will not let him go.” 

“Yes, Mrs Campion, I do acknowledge that she will be somewhat difficult to manage, I am sure that we can convince her of other virtues elsewhere. I also have written to Lady Susan for some further information of Mrs Campion that we can use to our advantage.” Esther said confidently. 

Lady Denham was quiet throughout Esther’s explanation, she watched Esther carefully, it felt like she was almost desperate to make this work, there was something else driving Esther and Lady Denham was determined to find out what. 

“I understand this seems like a small and simple plan however, I am convinced that if we can show Sidney that Georgiana is capable, and responsible to care for her own fortune and if we can convince Mrs Campion that she is about as welcome as small pox we will succeed. May I count on your support?”

Georgiana and Mary looked at one another, it seemed too simple to work, but Georgiana also wanted this chance to prove that she was capable of making decisions for herself. Mary too wanted to help anyway she could, maybe easing her conscious would help her to forgive Tom, help her own marriage. They both looked at one another and then turned to Esther.

“Yes, we will do what we can.” 

“And, may I ask what I am to do, I am only the Lady of this town.” Lady Denham said huffily. 

Esther smiled, that’s exactly what she needed from Lady Denham, for her to be herself, "Oh Aunt, I do believe that you bring so much already, just be kind to Charlotte when she comes.” 

During the luncheon, Esther and Lady Denham decided that it would be best for Georgiana to become Charlottes companion on all matters with regards to the rebuild. Lady Denham wanted daily reports from Tom Parker and for someone to keep an eye on his outlandish ideas. 

As they were speaking, the footman entered the room

“Miss Charlotte Heywood has arrived Ma’am”

“Well show her in then”

Charlotte walked into the big hall, immediately Georgiana ran to greet her friend, 

“Charlotte..” said Georgiana excitedly, “I am so happy to see you”.

Charlotte laughed and her hugged her friend, “I am so happy to see you too,”

Once Georgiana let Charlotte go, she turned and curtseyed to Lady Denham and Lady Babington. 

“Thank you so much for inviting me to Lady Denham” Charlotte said smiling. 

“It was Esther’s idea, seems I cannot be left alone “ 

Charlotte 6

As Charlotte entered the room Georgiana rose to greet her and gave her the biggest embrace nearly knocking her off her feet, she greeted the two ladies in the room then Charlotte noticed Mary standing quietly behind Esther. 

“Mary, I am so happy to see you, tell me are the children well?” Charlotte smiled as she said this and embraced Mary.

As she hugged Charlotte, Mary whispered “I am so happy to see you”. 

“Well sit down then” said Lady Denham, she then addressed the footman, “ensure Miss Heywood’s things are put in her room” and with that the footman left the room. 

Charlotte began to speak, addressing Esther first and thanking her and Lady Denham for their kind invitation and that she would be happy to help in anyway. 

“Miss Heywood, lets be frank, Mr Tom Parker has squandered and dreamt almost all of the investment away as well putting his whole family at risk, you will be my eyes and ears on this project along with Miss Lambe, who I hear is getting along well with her guardian.”

Charlotte froze at the mention of Sidney, had he been visiting Georgiana? Noticing the quizzical look, her on face Georgiana spoke “Sidney is still here Charlotte, he has yet to return to London and we have been spending sometime together, so yes Lady Denham your hearing is impeccable as always”. 

Charlotte suppressed a giggle, she always admired Georgiana’s refusal to be intimidated by Lady Denham, “oh Georgiana I am so happy that you and Mr Parker are finally finding some common ground”. Charlotte did not say anymore. 

Lady Denham spoke “I am sure that Miss Heywood is tired from her journey, and we will have much to discuss at dinner, Esther can you please escort me to my room, I am a little tired. Good day Miss Lambe, Mrs Parker.”

Charlotte watched as Esther walked beside Lady Denham slightly holding her elbow as she walked, whilst Lady Denham’s character and views did not seem to have been affected by her illness it seems there may have been a physical toll. 

Charlotte sat with Georgiana and Mary for a few minutes, catching up on news regarding the children, and the new ideas Mr Stringer had. Charlotte was grateful that Georgiana and Mary both avoided mentioning Sidney’s name. it was enough to deal with the fact that he was still here. 

She bid them both farewell and promised to attend them both first thing in the morning as she was sure that Lady Denham would put her to work immediately. Esther re-joined her and offered to escort her to her room. 

“I am sorry I did not inform you that Parker was still here, I hope this does not change your decision to stay here. “

“No of course not, in truth I am happy to return, Willingden seems so small now even compared to Sanditon. I wish Mr Parker and Mrs Campion every happiness. I am sure they will live very happily here.”

Esther scoffed, “Mrs Campion, living here, I think not. No, she has stayed in London but I am sure with Parker’s decision to stay and oversee the rebuild she may find time to visit”. 

They approached Charlottes new bedroom, as she walked in her breath was taken. The room was the most luxurious she had ever seen. From the heavy velvet drapes to the tall solid bedframe that encompassed the extremely high bed. She turned to see Esther smiling at her, her reaction must have been plain to see. 

“I’m glad to see you like” Esther smiled. 

“Its beautiful, thank you Lady Babington” 

“please, Charlotte call me Esther, we are friends” as she said this Charlotte noticed the colour of Esther’s face, Esther placed her hand on the wall “excuse me, I feel somewhat light headed”. 

Charlotte immediately went to Esther’s side, “let me walk you to your room and I shall call for Dr Fuchs.”

“Thank you, but there is no need to call the good doctor, I just need to lie down for a while.”

Charlotte escorted Esther to her room and ensured she was ok. 

“Charlotte, please feel at home here, we have a large library that is in desperate need of a good reader. Dinner will be served at 8pm sharp.” Esther smiled and closed her eyes. 

Charlotte returned to her room and unpacked her things. She decided to take a walk around the grounds. 

As she was leaving Lord Babington arrived, “well met Miss Heywood, glad to see you made your journey here, not too harsh I hope.”

“well met Lord Babington, and please call me Charlotte. My journey was very satisfactory. Esther is upstairs, she took a little faint whilst showing me to her room, I offered to call for Dr Fuchs but she insisted she just needed to lie down.”

“Thank you, Charlotte, and please make yourself at home, now if you will excuse me, I must attend to my wife.”

Lord Babington bound the steps in what seemed two steps, Charlotte smiled, how lucky they both were to have found one another. Charlotte had never seen a man dote so much on woman before. 

Well, she thought a new fresh walk and some reading before dinner, she was going to be fine, simply fine.

Dinner was a subdued affair, Esther barely ate a thing and looked like she may faint at any moment, both Lord Babington and Lady Denham were very worried about her. Excusing herself from the table Esther left with Lord Babington to their room.

Lady Denham and Charlotte made their way into the large drawing room, "I am surprised you returned Miss Heywood, I would have thought being back amongst your own family would have brought you some comfort." Lady Denham looked pointedly at Charlotte when she said this.

Defiantly Charlotte held her her gaze, "Yes ma'am, I did enjoy being with my family but I do not feel I have a real purpose there now that my brothers are starting to grow and help my father more. During my time here in Sanditon I came to value my independence."

Lady Denham looked at Charlotte, "hmmph, well we shall see! now choose a book and read to me for a while, I am not ready for sleep yet"

Sometime later Charlotte found herself lying in her new bed, she hoped she would have a peaceful sleep tonight.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet.......

Chapter 7

Charlotte 7 and Sidney 5

Sidney looked out of the window, the streets were starting to come alive and at this very moment Charlotte Heywood was in Sanditon. Mary had informed him on her return from the luncheon that Charlotte had arrived. 

Sleep had alluded him since she had left but there was an anxiousness this morning that made him restless, he grabbed his coat and headed out to the calmest spot he knew. 

Charlotte lay staring at the canopy above her, she had slept a little, but had felt restless all night. She rose from her bed, dressed in her simple white dress, wrapped her heavy shawl around her and decided that if she could not lie still then she would go for a walk, she longed to see the water again. 

Charlotte stopped walking when she realised where she was, standing in the place that meant so much to them both. For a brief second Charlotte closed her eyes, the breeze fell over her, she remembered the smell of him, his arms as he held her close, this was the closest to madness she would allow herself to fall to. 

Sidney walked the familiar path he walked every day, he looked at the ground as he did not have the strength to hold his head today it seemed. As he reached the top he looked up, for a moment he thought he was dreaming. Immediately he recognised her beautiful dark curls, her simple white dress blowing with the breeze. Charlotte, his Charlotte. He wanted to run to her, and yet he knew he should turn around and leave her be but he could not, he was frozen to the spot, if this was a dream he did not care he just wanted to stay in this moment for a while longer. 

Charlotte froze, she did not know how or why but she knew that he was there. She felt the hairs on her neck stand as though a shock had run through her. She could simply turn and walk the other way, not even look in the direction of which he stood, that would be the sensible thing to do, but none of this had been sensible and no matter how much she tried to put him from her mind she knew deep down she wanted to see his face. Charlotte steeled her shoulders and turned to face Sidney Parker, what she saw was not the hardened face she thought she would see but before her she saw her own face, the same broken look.

Sidney watched Charlotte turn towards him, he willed himself to be polite and to leave immediately but once he looked into her eyes he was lost again. He looked at her, taking in everything about her, he smiled to himself as she stood there, she had the same look she had the many times when she scolded him, steel determination. It warmed him somehow that this was difficult for her, that she had not forgotten about him. Charlotte had never expressed how she felt to him but when he looked at her eyes, her beautiful brown eyes he could see the same sadness as his own.

“Miss Heywood, am I never to escape you?” Sidney said, 

“If you don’t wish to be disturbed you might find somewhere more secluded”, Charlotte smiled as she answered him, remembering one of their many disagreements.

“You returned” Sidney said willing their conversation to continue for a moment longer as he took a step towards her. 

“I arrived yesterday at Lady Babington’s request, it seems she requires my assistance with Lady Denham, I thought you would be in London”? 

“I need to ensure the plans for the rebuild, Mr Stringer has agreed to stay on until the work is completed with a condition that he reports to me and not Tom.” said Sidney. 

Charlotte looked at Sidney, he was staring at her with those dark eyes. All of sudden it became too much for her, she needed to get back, “I wish you well Mr Parker, I am sure Sanditon will rise from the ashes” Charlotte moved, she needed this conversation to be over.

As she walked past him, he whispered “I come here every day”. 

Charlotte stopped next to him, she was afraid that in that moment she would reveal her feelings, beg him to choose her, to find the nearest coach and run as fast as they could to Scotland. 

Instead, she looked ahead and said, “Put me from your mind Mr Parker, or you will go mad”. Charlotte walked away as quickly as she could. 

Sidney held his breath as she stood next to him, he wanted to grab her, tell her that he loved her, Tom and Eliza be dammed but he couldn’t do that to her, he would never tarnish her reputation or have any union between them tainted with scandal. 

When she spoke, the words hit him as if he had been hit squarely in the face only this time it was his heart, “ put me from your mind, or you will go mad”. She used his own words and now it seemed that he had put her on the path that he found himself on all those years ago. He hated himself for making her feel that way, he was angry at Tom for being so irresponsible and expecting him to pick up the pieces, he resented the whole mess, but the one thing knew in that moment as she walked away from him he would never be free of his love for Charlotte Heywood.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly, thank you all for the lovely and inspiring comments from you all, it is so very kind of you to take time to read the story and to comment. 
> 
> This is a bit of a filler chapter, after the "meeting" I needed to get the characters in certain places so this serves as that. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy,

Chapter 8

Sidney and Mary 

Sidney was unsure how long he had remained standing at their spot before he heard Mary calling his name. 

“Sidney, are you alright?” Mary asked as she reached his side. She had called him 3 times before he acknowledged her. He seemed lost in his own world. 

“Mary well met. I couldn’t sleep so I decided a morning walk may help me”

Mary smiled at Sidney, “I have heard you leave every morning since she left, I presume this place means something to the two of you?”

“I saw her this morning, “ 

Mary looked at Sidney, she lay her hand on his arm. 

“What have I done Mary?” Sidney asked quietly even though he knew she could not provide him with any answer that would suffice.

I am so sorry Sidney, if I could do anything to help both of you I would, I hope you know that. If only I had known how deep Tom was sinking, if I had took more of an interest, if I..”

Sidney turned to face Mary. He saw how upset she had become; tears glistened her eyes as she tried to apologise.

“Mary, this is not your fault, yes my brother should have been more truthful with all of us, but he is not alone in fault. I have been recklessly ignorant of my family these last few years, shirking responsibility at every turn, not taking any interest in Toms plans. I failed Georgiana, Tom, all of you…..I failed Charlotte.”

“Is that why you have stayed? Took charge of the rebuild?”

“Yes, in my mind if I can make Sanditon a success and help Tom then maybe Charlotte will not think too badly of me, I want to be man she thought I was. I owe her that much.”

Mary listened quietly and took her time before she spoke. 

“You are that man Sidney, Charlotte knows this”. 

Sidney smiled at his sister-in-law , “Lets get back to Trafalgar House, …Eliza is arriving today and it would not bode well for me not to be there when she arrives”. 

He offered his arm to Mary and they walked the rest of the way home in blissful silence. 

Charlotte 

Charlotte walked briskly back to Sanditon House; images of Sidney blurred her mind. His smile, his eyes searching hers. Part of her wished that she could do what Sidney did all those years ago and run away to sea, but alas she could not. Truthfully, she hated to admit that a part of her had been glad to see him. 

As she entered Sanditon House she could hear Lady Denham mention her name.

“Sarah said she was not in her room! Maybe she has gone back to her home, these young girls can be quite fickle”.

Charlotte smiled as she entered the dining room, “Good morning Lady Denham, my apologies for my tardiness, I woke early and decided to take a walk to see the sea.” She joined the table. 

“May I ask how Esther is?”

“She is still to her room, George is insisting that we call that doctor, not sure what help he will be. All Esther needs is the sea air and water to restore her health.”

“I am sure that Lord…I mean George is very worried about Esther, maybe bringing the doctor will help ease his mind.” Charlotte said trying to ensure that Lady Denham did not ban Dr Fuchs from the house. 

“Thank you, Charlotte, my dear Aunt here will not listen to reason. “ Lord Babington said, “Esther has asked to see you once you have finished your breakfast if don’t mind.”

“Of course not, I shall go to her now. “ 

“Be not long mind, I have some errands for you to run and a message for you to take to Mr Tom Parker.”

“Yes, Lady Denham” and with that Charlotte made her way to see Esther.

Charlotte knocked gently on the door and entered. Esther was sitting up in her bed, “good morning Charlotte, you slept well, I hope? I know that my Aunt will have a great deal of work for you to do but would you mind taking a note to Dr Fuchs for me. George is insisting that I see him.”

“Of course, Lady Denham states she has some errands she would like me to do, I am also excited to see the children.”

“and Sidney…” Esther asked.

“I saw Mr Parker this morning whilst I was walking”. 

Charlotte offered no further explanation or information with regards to their conversation or how she felt about it. It was hard to talk about Sidney, to anyone. She rose to her feet and took the note from Esther and promised to look in on her once she returned. 

Once she left Esther’s room, she gathered her coat and a letter she had written for her parents. Charlotte took her instruction from Lady Denham. 

“Make sure Tom Parker informs you on everything that you have missed, I want you to speak with both Mr Stringer and Mr Parker with regards to any plans. I would also ask you to call on Miss Lambe to attend you on your errands, it would be better to have two sets of eyes on Tom Parker. “

Perplexed at Lady Denham’s request for her to bring Georgiana with her on business errands, Charlotte knew better than to question it. Once she had all her instruction from Lady Denham and assured Lord Babington she would see Dr Fuchs as her first call Charlotte set off to town. She felt calm now that they had seen one another, there surely could be no more surprises. 

Georgiana 

“Good Morning Miss Lambe, are you off to see Mr Parker?”

“I am Mr Stringer, do you have a message you wish me to pass?” 

“No thank you Miss, but I am heading to see him myself, may I walk with you.”

“Of course,” Georgiana smiled and took the paper from Mr Stringer. 

She liked Mr Stringer, since the fire she had spoke with him quite often. He was a kind and honest man. On the way to Trafalgar House they spoke about the repairs, the new fashionable ideas that Tom Parker had been insisting they try to make work. 

“I hear Miss Heywood has returned; I hope she is well?” 

“Yes, she arrived yesterday and has promised to visit us all today, I am sure she will be incredibly happy to see you. She spoke of you with such high regard as her friend.” Georgiana knew that James Stringer held a soft spot for Charlotte.

They arrived at Trafalgar House and Tom Greeted them as they entered. 

“Well met Miss Lambe, and you Mr Stringer.”

“Thank you, sir, I am here to see Mr Sidney Parker” Mr Stringer said, not wanting to waste time. 

“Of course, of course, Please both of you come in, we seem to be expecting many guests today.”

Sidney was sitting at the desk when Georgiana walked into the room, Tom had taken this time to relay yet another idea to Stringer who was too polite to be rude. 

“By the looks of you, you have seen her then”? 

“Good Morning Georgiana, how nice to see you! And if you are referring to Charlotte, yes I have. We briefly met this morning and as for your comment I am not sure what you mean?” Sidney smiled. 

“well you look terrible, like you are going to explode any moment, in fact anyone would think that woman was coming here” ..Georgiana let out a giggle but stopped as she watched Sidney wince at the joke. 

“No, no, no,no… Georgiana began… “Why is she coming, are you mad? Why did you invite her? Does Charlotte know? Oh, and do not expect me to visit you whilst she is here. Fingers crossed her horse goes lame or she does.” Georgiana exploded her opinion in a series of fast questions and statements that quite frankly Sidney could not keep up with.

“She is an odious woman; well I don’t plan on seeing her and I will thank you to not insist that I do!” she said defiantly as she fell into her seat. 

Sidney 

Sidney stood there and let Georgiana ramble on, at this point he thought there was no point in trying to interrupt her and answer one of her many questions until she had fully finished her tirade.

“To answer your questions, I had to invite her as I was not returning to London and it was my duty to invite her here, I did not mention it to Charlotte as our meeting was brief. Georgiana I am fully aware of your feelings towards Mrs Campion, but I hope this does not change or impede on the progress that we have made. Of course I will not make you visit her but I do hope that you will visit me even if she is here.”

“Hmmphh” was the only reply that Georgiana gave Sidney, and that was better than nothing he thought. Eliza would be arriving at any moment and he would have to play the dutiful fiancé, another promise he had made, to honour his side of the bargain. 

“You need to rescue Mr Stringer, he escorted me here and has been kidnapped by your brother”. Georgiana added sullenly. 

Sidney walked to the parlour and there was Tom, rambling off ideas to Mr Stringer, anger rose in Sidney, he loved his brother, but to see him standing there talking about houses, and apartments and of course how his beloved Beau Monde would flock to Sanditon without the smallest concern of the agony that he had wrought. 

“Tom, what are you doing I believe Mr Stringer is here to see me, Good Morning Mr Stringer, do you have those costs I asked for.”

“I do Sir, once the winter is over, we can start to build the main outside of the building until then the adjoing buildings can be repaired and painted. The men will be glad of the work.”

“Thank you Mr Stringer, I shall look over the costs today and let you know of my decision. But I agree that it is best to wait until the end of the winter but do what we can now.”

“Sidney I must protest” said Tom, “We need to rebuild the main apartments now, the winters balls of London are taking place, we can visit and tell them all of the delights of Sanditon.”

Sidney looked at his brother, “Mr Stringer, I thank you again and now if you don’t mind, I need to speak with my brother, good day. “and with that Mr Stringer left. 

“Tom….” Sidney went to begin but at that moment there was a knock at the door, he knew who this was “we will discuss this later”. 

Sidney made his way to the door, there stood the woman he was going to marry, and at that moment Sidney realised he very much needed a drink!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I would like to sincerley apologise for the break in this story, unfortunately the latter end of the year has not been good for myself and my family and I had to take a break from writing. I have decided to take this up again and I feel most at piece when I am trying to write. 
> 
> I have changed the format now that I have all the players in the story where they need to be. I hope that you still like the story and I hope to have many chapters uploaded soon.

Chapter 9

Eliza stepped from her carriage and looked at the house before her. She sighed, not sure how she had found herself back in this place. The thought that once this dreadful rebuild begins, she and Sidney can return to London, to her friends, helped with her uneasiness. 

Eliza entered the house and she heard Sidney’s raised voice speaking his brother’s name. Suddenly it became quiet and Sidney appeared in the hallway. 

“Well met Eliza, I hope your journey was a pleasant one?” 

“My dearest Sidney” she said as she stepped towards him and raised her cheek slightly. 

Sidney gave her the briefest of kisses, he did not look like a fiancé that was ecstatic to see his bride to be, but she knew that the responsibilities of Tom and this town were laying heavy on his shoulders, once they were back in London all would be well. Tom and Mary joined them in the hall. 

“Mrs Campion, how nice to see you, I had hoped you would join us before the winter set in” said Tom. 

Eliza smiled at Tom Parker; Mary however stood quietly behind her husband as he bestowed his greetings. 

“Mary, how nice to see you again” 

Mary stepped forward and smiled “I hope you had a good journey Mrs Campion? The weather can be difficult this time of year”

“Please call me Eliza, we are almost family” Eliza said as she held Mary’s hand. Mary simply smiled back at her. 

“Well, shall we go into the parlour for some tea” said Sidney desperate to break Tom’s hovering and overtures of welcome. 

Once they were all in the parlour, Eliza was about to speak when the children came running into the room, shouting, “Mama, mama, have you heard that Charlotte is back, she has returned to us. “. 

Eliza stood there; she slowly turned her gaze to Sidney, who had started to make his way to the where the whiskey was situated. She looked at Mary smiling at her children. 

“Yes, my dears and she will come to see you soon. She is helping Lady Denham while she recovers. Now please go and play”. The children left the room, Eliza realised they never even acknowledged her presence. 

She looked directly at Mary and said, “I thought Miss Heywood had returned to her family, surely she has not left them again so soon”?

“She came at Lady Babington’s request to help aid her aunt in her recovery, she will be staying at Sanditon House, but the children are so fond of her I do believe they may burst if she does not visit soon, would you like some tea?”. Mary said smiling at Eliza. 

“That would be lovely thank you, but I must go upstairs and change, I feel as if I have been in these clothes for an age. Sidney can show me to my room”. Eliza said to Mary as she wanted to speak with Sidney alone. As Eliza followed Sidney to her room, she entered and asked him to stay with her a moment. 

“So, you failed to mention Miss Heywood’s return, is there anything else I should know”?

Sidney sighed, “I did not mention it Eliza as she did not come at my request or as a guest of Tom and Marys, therefore it is not my business to mention the whereabouts of Miss Heywood, now if you will excuse me, I have many things to attend to”, 

“Sidney…” Eliza moved towards Sidney, standing close to him she looked up at him, 

“I have missed you..” She rested her hand on his chest and looked up with her big brown eyes. They were nearly married and had known each other for a lifetime; they need not wait like other couples. She wanted him, and he could never resist her. Sidney looked down at Eliza, he remembered back to when they were younger and she would look at him like that, he thought he was the luckiest man in the world. Now, even her touch repulsed him, he stood back. 

“Eliza, this is my brothers’ home, I do not think this would be appropriate given we are not yet married. I will see you at dinner, please make yourself comfortable and let me know if you need anything. He swiftly left the room. 

Sidney leant against the wall outside the room, how the hell was he going to get through the rest of his life when he could not bear to have her even touch him. He closed his eyes, he had to try, that was the promise he made, and he could not bear to break another promise. With a heavy heart he knocked Eliza’s door, when she answered he noticed she seemed surprised.

“Once you are settled, would you like to perhaps take a walk through the town, I can show you the plans that we have for the restoration”. Eliza agreed. Sidney made his way down to the office, Tom was there waiting for him. 

“I hope Eliza is happy with everything, it will be good for you to have her here with you, and we can all plan for Sanditon together. 

Sidney was not sure why but the moment the words left Tom’s mouth Sidney charged before him, grabbed him by his clothes and pressed him against the wall. 

“I would burn this place to the ground if I could, do you understand that? Do you?”

Shocked by his own behaviour Sidney stepped back, he released Tom. 

“How dare you”. Tom said, “I was there for you when you needed help, I bailed you out, and I stopped you almost killing yourself.” Tom shouted at Sidney. 

“I was a BOY”, screamed Sidney, “I dearly hope Henry never has to rely on you for anything because he will have to pay for it for the rest of his life”. 

“Enough” a small but strong voice, “the children can hear you shouting” Mary said. 

“Sidney, I suggest you and Eliza take your walk now and return for dinner, Tom – you and I need to speak”. 

And with that Sidney left the room, he was so angry, thank god for Mary he thought because he was sure that at any moment, he would have punched Tom right there and then. At that moment Eliza came down the stairs, 

Is everything all right? I heard raised voices” 

“Yes, just Tom and I disagreeing as usual. I see your ready, shall we go?”.

Sidney and Eliza left Trafalgar House and made their way through the town. She asked about Diana and Arthur, Sidney explained they would be staying in London for the winter and Sidney realised that he would miss them, he had enjoyed his time with his younger siblings this summer. Lost in his own thoughts Sidney did not realise that Eliza had suddenly stopped walking and was staring at the two people coming towards them, Charlotte, and Georgina. 

“Oh god there she is, can you feel the cold chill” Georgiana said to Charlotte as she saw Eliza straight in front of her, Charlotte smiled and Georgiana and motioned for them to walk forward. Every muscle in Charlottes body seem to tighten. There was no avoiding them, for as long as they were all in Sanditon this would become a daily occurrence and a challenge she had no intention of shrinking from, Charlotte had enough of feeling like that. 

“Good day Sidney, myself and Charlotte were just on our way to Trafalgar House, we have some letters to deliver from Lady Denham and she would like a report on your progress. Oh Mrs Campion, I did not see you there, I hope your journey was not too difficult. Well we must be going, busy busy”….Georgiana said all of this in a hurry refusing to let Eliza have one word of the conversation. 

Charlotte smiled, she was grateful for Georgiana and her bravery because at that moment her own failed her. She merely smiled at the couple and proceeded on with her journey to see Mary and Tom. Sidney gestured to Eliza that they should follow in the same direction, if Lady Denham had sent a note, he ought to read it immediately he did not have the patience to deal with her also. Eliza with a murderous look on her face thundered her way back to Trafalgar House.

“You also failed to mention that she now seems to be involved with Lady Denham’s business in the town Sidney, I will not tolerate being lied to in this way “ she said through her teeth. 

“Eliza, if you would like to know how Lady Denham conducts her affairs then I suggest that you enquire with her directly although I think that the conversation will not go as you think. Now I need to attend whatever message that she has sent, and if you are to manage your investment you may have to tolerate the fact that for the time being it seems Miss Heywood will be a part of that.”  
Eliza was furious, she had no intention tolerating anything of that girl or Georgiana for that matter. She hoped Sidney would not insist that she come live with them in London. As she walked back towards Trafalgar House she felt ill, the thought of watching the Parkers and their children fawn over a farm girl was almost too much to bare. She would make her excuses and leave but she had a great deal to say to Sidney that evening. 

Charlotte and Georgiana walked quickly to the house; they were greeted by an incredibly happy Mary. 

“Charlotte, Georgiana, please come through, how good it is to see you both”, Georgiana made her way into the office as Mary and Charlotte embraced one another. Charlotte noticed that Mary held her for what seemed a long time and with a fierce embrace. “Please, please come through, I know that the children are so desperate to see you.” With that the door opened once more and in came Sidney and Eliza. Charlotte proceeded quickly into the office and was greeted by the sounds of the children who seemed incredibly pleased to see her along with their father. 

“Charlotte and Georgiana are here Papa, can they stay and play with us”? asked the children excitedly. 

“Not today my dears, it seems they are here on official business, but I promise we will ensure they join us for tea and cake another day.” Said Tom noticing the handwriting on the notes in Charlottes hand. The children quickly dispersed and, in the office, stood Tom, Sidney, Mary, Georgiana and Charlotte all looking nervously at one another. 

Charlotte found her voice, “Lady Denham has requested that I pass you these letters and she requires all your presence at a luncheon tomorrow, I also am to invite Mr Stringer. Lady Denham has requested that due to my previous work within the Sanditon project I am to be her eyes and ears for any new business that needs her attention”. Charlotte decided to give all the information at once, she was unsure how long she could stand to be in this room. 

All of sudden a voice broke through the silence, “If you will excuse me, I have had a very long journey and wish to rest before dinner.” And with that Eliza left the room. Tom stood there looking a little perplexed and Sidney took the letter from Charlotte and promised a reply would be sent this evening. With that he left the office and went to his room, being so close to Charlotte was too much. Charlotte and Georgiana said their goodbyes whilst promising to catch up soon with Mary. 

Sidney stood looking into the fireplace, he thought back to how for so many years he had imagined this situation. Eliza here with him, wanting to be his wife. When had it all changed? Why had it changed? Her face came to his mind, Charlotte. He had been so angry at the world, so hurt and she saw through that, she wanted nothing from him but for him to wake up and see the world around him, to see his family, to see Georgiana. She refused to excuse his rude behaviour, she wanted nothing from him, yet he wanted to give everything he had to her. 

Sidney remembered back to his younger days; Eliza had been the beauty of their town. Her smile lit up a room, and the day she spoke to Sidney he felt that a feeling that was indescribable. They spent their youth running around the shore, laughing, planning the things they may do. Then, one summer after visiting relatives in London Eliza returned a different person. All she could talk of was the parties she had been too, the rich London ladies with fine dresses and beautiful homes. She wanted to live a life like that. Sidney had told her he would give her the world; they would conquer it together. Eliza did not agree or maybe she had no faith in him, Sidney was never sure why but she accepted another’s hand. The day she told him Sidney remembered vividly. She stood there, trying to explain that she had to be sure she would be secure. She wanted a life outside of Sanditon and they were both so young she could not be sure that they would ever achieve such a dream. So, she left, and married the life she so craved. 

He had been so angry for so long he had not realised how tired it had made him. Then to his surprise, one day walking along the cliff happened a strange new face, one that in an instant stirred something in him. Her beautiful brown eyes seemed to burn straight through him. He had been so rude, many times over yet she never waived, her refusal to cower. She was brave, she was capable, she was intelligent, she was Charlotte.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlottes first day running errands for Lady Denham, I wonder who she shall meet on her travels, will Mary finally speak with Tom, and what on earth is wrong with Esther?/
> 
> Enjoy.....

Chapter 10

Charlotte and Georgiana left Trafalgar House, and went to visit Mr Stringer who was very pleased to see that Charlotte had returned although he was a little perplexed as to why he was to dine with Lady Denham but he would be happy to accept. Once she had promised to visit him again soon, they left and walked towards the office of Dr Fuchs, Charlotte dispatched her note to him, and he promised to attend Lady Babington within the hour. As they walked back towards Mrs Griffiths house, Charlotte noticed how animated Georgiana became when she was talking about her ideas and the discussions, she had been having with Mr Stringer, Charlotte was pleased that they had become friends. 

“I think a better school and library would benefit the children, maps of places beyond the sea and this cold island. I also have a few ideas regarding who we should bring here, but I am unsure that Sidney would want to hear them, and they certainly don’t meet the high expectations that Tom Parker seems to have”. Georgiana said sullenly. Charlotte looked at her friend, “Maybe you should mention these ideas to Lady Denham tomorrow, and you should definitely speak to Sidney about them, you are after all becoming friends.”

Georgiana smiled at Charlotte and quickly changed the subject. As they walked along the street, they chatted about Charlottes return home and the reason for her sudden return, how Charlotte was so taken aback by Esther’s offer and she was unsure whether to return but she realised that she missed her new friends and her life here. After safely escorting Georgiana back to Mrs Griffiths’ she proceeded to walk back to Sanditon House, as she walked along the sea front she become lost in her thoughts. She was glad that she had seen Sidney before arriving at Trafalgar House, and although she knew that Mrs Campion would not be far away yet, to see her and Sidney together hurt as much as it did when she learned of their engagement. Charlotte tried to push her feelings for Sidney from her mind but it was no use. She felt no different than she had when she had left but she made a promise to herself that those feelings would not govern her. There was nothing that could be done, their situation was sealed but as she walked along the water she remembered the feel of him close to her, kissing her, the smell of him. How would she ever love again?

Dr Fuchs arrived at Sanditon House as promised, he was greeted by the footman and escorted into see Lady Denham.

“Good Afternoon Lady Denham, you look much recovered from the last time I saw you”

“Ahh Dr Fuchs, yes well as I told everyone sea water is the cure not these fickle concoctions that you seem to peddle, I believe that you are here to see my niece, she is upstairs and I am unsure as to why she thinks that you can do better than the remedy I have been using for years I have no idea….”

In a flash Lord Babington appeared in the room and Dr Fuchs was at last saved from what was sure to be another tongue lashing from the great lady herself, however he noticed real worry when she spoke of Esther. He also noticed that Lady Denham’s illness had taken a toll on her, she seemed a little frailer in her physical appearance. 

“Dr Fuchs my wife is waiting for you” said Lord Babington kindly, smiling and bowing to Lady Denham as they left the room. Babington and Dr Fuchs made their way up to the room to find Esther sitting on her chair looking out toward the direction of Denham House, lost in her thoughts. 

“Esther, my dear, Dr Fuchs is here” said Babington softly. 

“Come in Dr Fuchs, and thank you for coming. Babington if you could give the Dr and I a few moments please”. Not happy at being asked to leave, but Babington knew better than to argue with Esther. Not bearing to be too far away he paced the hallway outside. After what seemed an age Dr Fuchs came from the room and gestured for Lord Babington to go inside. Babington searched his face for any type of sign that all was not well but as any seasoned physician Dr Fuchs gave nothing away. For a moment Babington stood outside, frozen to the spot, he could not bear anything to be wrong with Esther, he was too nervous to set foot inside, that was until he heard an inpatient tone ordering him inside. 

“Babington, please do not prevent Dr Fuchs from leaving as I am sure he is wanting to avoid yet another talk with Lady Denham, who I believe will be resting at the moment if a quick escape was something he would like to do” Esther said smiling. Dr Fuchs smiled gratefully at Lord Babington and made his way quickly and quietly through the house. Babington stepped into their room and looked at Esther, she sat calmly and smiled at him. “I would like to go and visit Denham Place tomorrow, I have some plans and I would like your opinion”.

Babington stood there shocked, “I am more interested with what Dr Fuchs said, are you well?”, Esther replied. “Shut the door my dear, and I will tell you everything”. 

Tom was shifting through papers when Mary entered the office. “May I speak with you” she said. 

“Of course, my dear, please come in, come in.” It had been a long time since Mary had wanted to speak with him and he happily welcomed her into his room. 

“I heard you this morning, with Sidney and I think it is time that we discuss the mess that your decisions have made of this family”. 

“Really Mary, all I have ever wanted was to ensure that Sanditon took its place alongside the likes of Brighton, that we grow and take our place amongst the beau monde. Take our place in society”. He held Marys hand as he said this. Mary sighed as she looked up at her husband. She knew that he had big ideas for Sanditon but at what cost. 

“Why does the beau monde mean so much to you? Why, at the expense of everything that you hold dear did you risk our lives, reputations and even our home on the acceptance of people that do not care about Sanditon or you,? You will never be one of them or accepted into their circle” Mary began to say when Tom tried to interrupt.

“They have it in their power to render us fashionable to the whole of London and beyond, the aristocracy walking the boards of our town….”

“Tom please, listen to yourself. Even now, after everything I have said to you, all we have still isn’t enough. What happens when Sanditon isn’t fashionable anymore? When the next exciting place takes their fancy. You whole dream will end and you will end up with an empty town. And Sidney, what of him? He has sacrificed his life, his happiness to fix the mess that you created by your lying and deceit and yet you still do not own to it. All will be well? No it will not Tom, everyone around you can see that except you. At this moment I look upon you and I do not see the man I married, I see a liar, a reckless man willing to sacrifice all that is dear to him for a moments recognition that is as fleeting as a summers day”. Mary said sadly. 

Tom stood there, unsure what to say, he looked at his wife and for the first time he saw disappointment, sadness, she looked at him like a stranger. Mary walked to leave the room, she looked back at him staring at her. She realised then that it did not seem to matter what the cost was, to him it was worth it, it maybe worth losing his family for. Mary walked out of the room quickly ensuring Tom did not see the tears spring to her eyes. 

That evening, their meal was a quiet affair. Sidney noticed the tension between Tom and Mary, how Mary no longer seemed angry but so desperately sad. Tom was quiet, not even trying to engage Eliza in animated conversation of his ideas. Sidney looked around the table of people, and all he could think of was the woman that was currently dining in another house, he wished he could be with her. To share their food and their stories of their day. Curl up by the fire, hold her, kiss her. But those dreams were no longer his, this before him was his life. Stilted conversation with a woman he no longer knew.

Across at Sanditon House, Charlotte enjoyed a spirited dinner with Lady Denham who had told her that she intended to have words again with Tom Parker tomorrow. Charlotte informed her that Mr Stringer and Mr Sidney Parker seemed to have matters in hand and she would be able to look upon the administration soon. Charlotte informed her that the Parker’s would attend her luncheon but they would be bringing a guest in the form of Mrs Campion. 

“Ah, the wealthy widow by all accounts, well I remember her, a slip of girl when she left this place, full of dreams, it seems she has made them a reality”. Lady Denham said in a bitter tone. Noticing the look on Charlottes face, she decided to enquire a little more about the situation between Sidney and Mrs Campion. 

“I am surprised at Sidney Parker, I did not think he would marry someone like that. I remember when she left him, heartbroken he was.”. Charlotte smiled as much as she could and nodded. The last thing she wanted to do was talk about the love that Sidney lost, for she felt the same about herself. At that moment Lord Babington entered the dinning room. 

“Aunt, Charlotte, Esther would like to see you both in the small drawing room. She is feeling a little better and wondered if you could join her.”

“Of course dear boy, I think Miss Heywood was not too fond of our conversation anyhow.” Charlotte was sure she saw Lady Denham slightly smile at her. They both finished their food and proceed to go to the drawing room. There they found Esther sitting in chair, smiling, looking better than she had these past few days. 

“Well, did that quack have anything to say? Are you quite well?” demanded Lady Denham as she took her place next to Esther. 

“I am well Aunt, just a case of sickness. I just need a few more days of rest and I shall be back to my old self. Now we have a luncheon to discuss. Charlotte, I take you have delivered all the invitations and secured everyone’s attendance”?

“Yes, everyone will attend although Mr Stringer was very surprised to be included but he is much looking forward to it.” Charlotte said. 

“Good, I will draw up the sitting list and I would be grateful if you could pass this to our housekeeper Mrs H, she will ensure everything runs smoothly for tomorrow. Now, tell me any news from Parker’s? Esther enquired.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlottes becoming brave, Sidney is getting worse, and Esther is full of ideas, The drama before the lunch - enjoy

Chapter 11

Sidney stood on the clifftop, although Eliza was staying with them, he felt the same pull to this place, their place. Today was going to be hard enough attending Lady Denham’s luncheon, being in the same room as Charlotte. Maybe going back to London would be the best thing for the both of them but the thought of being so far away from her hurt his heart. When she had returned to Willingden it nearly broke him. The whole thing was a mess, as he looked out to sea he still couldn’t believe the life before him. He had been so happy for the briefest moment, the happiest he had ever been, even looking back to those years with Eliza. The connection he felt with Charlotte was something he had never felt before. She allowed him to be himself even at his very worst, she did not cower, she did not turn away. She encouraged and at times demanded that he be better. Sidney took at a deep breath, it was time to return to the house, as he did not feel like explaining his morning ritual to anyone. 

Charlotte woke early and sat at the window of her room. She stared out to the large park before her. She was tempted to take an early morning walk but she knew exactly where she would walk to and that would be a selfish act, putting them both through the pain for a mere moment alone no matter how much she wanted it. Charlotte thought back to the night of the ball, both of them alone on the balcony, she had never felt so much happiness and love. She closed her eyes and remembered the words he spoke to her. Tears came to her eyes, how had they been so happy for so little a time, Charlotte took a deep breath and went to prepare herself for the day. 

Sidney arrived back at Trafalgar House to the sounds of his nephew and nieces running around, as he walked into the room Henry jumped to greet him.

“Where have you been Uncle Sidney”? Henry enquired. 

“I have been to visit the sea this morning” Sidney smiled at his nephew as he swept him up into his arms and walked in to the breakfast room. 

Sitting at the table was Tom, Mary and Eliza, who seemed to not be enjoying the noise of a house full of children.

“Sidney you have been out early, may I ask what business needs to be attended to so urgently”. Said Eliza. 

“No business Eliza, just collecting my thoughts for the day. I must visit Georgiana and speak with Mr Stringer also. If you will excuse me Eliza, I will be back before luncheon”. Sidney said sharply. 

Mary could see that Eliza was not happy at the thought of being abandoned and was about to express her opinion on the matter when she decided to interject. 

“Mrs Campion, I would very much like to hear your plans for your upcoming wedding, and we can leave Sidney to his business, men do not often give the best opinion on such matters”. Mary looked at the state of Sidney, he still wasn’t sleeping and knowing that he would have to spend the afternoon with Charlotte must be agonising for him. Eliza smiled and agreed. Sidney smiled gratefully at Mary, nodded briefly at Tom and left for Mrs Griffiths house. 

  
Mrs Griffiths showed Sidney into the parlour, and offered him some breakfast which he gratefully accepted and was eating as Georgiana entered the room.

“Don’t tell me she has put you off your food already” Georgiana said laughing. 

Sidney finished his breakfast and smiled at Georgiana, he liked the ease between them and he never imagined that she would be the person he could be so open with about his feelings. 

“I was in no mood for either Tom or Mrs Campion this morning, I found I could not sleep and went for a walk, and then I thought I would come and spend some time with you”. 

“You mean I was your means of escape”? Georgiana smiled as she teased him. In truth she was worried for him, he looked terrible before Charlotte returned, now he looked angry and sleep deprived. 

“ Do you love her” Georgiana asked bluntly. 

Sidney paused before he answered, any other person would never dare to be so open and frank with him, therefore he decided to answer truthfully. 

“She is my whole heart, I feel lost without her” 

Georgiana placed her hand on Sidney’s hand and quietly sat with him. There were no words that she could say in that moment that would be of any comfort and after todays luncheon she had a feeling his mood would be very different. They both sat there quietly for a while and before he left he made her promise to come with them to the luncheon and in a moment of weakness she agreed but did say that she couldn’t promise not to throw Mrs Campion out of the carriage. 

Lady Denham knocked lightly on the bedroom door of Esther’s room and entered. Esther was again sitting on the chair peering out in the direction of Denham Place. Lady Denham sat next to her niece. 

“I can ask Mr Stringer to tear the place down if you so wish” Lady Denham said quietly. 

“There is no need to destroy what was once a beautiful building because a snake was once in the house. I will be speaking to Mr Stringer today about some plans I have for the place if that is agreeable with you Aunt”? Esther asked. 

Lady Denham did not answer straight away, she merely looked at Esther in a few short months she has seen her change, she saw a woman finally come to the light after being covered in darkness and lies. 

“I have already purchased it from that disgusting nephew of mine, so do as you please, it is yours” 

Esther looked at her Aunt in surprise, she knew of the sale of the house but did not expect her to gift to her. 

“I purchased the thing so that he would have no reason to darken our door again, he has the money he so coverts and you can have peace of mind. Esther, you have a man that loves you more than you could ever know, you have the chance of a good life, do not waste it thinking of past mistakes and broken promises”. 

Esther looked thoughtfully at her Aunt, her tough exterior sometimes gave way to softness and wisdom, a side she did not show to everyone and Esther was glad of it at that time. 

“Thank you Aunt” Esther replied softly. “Now, lets ensure this luncheon is prepared.”

Lady Denham decided that she wanted to see the books before the Parker’s arrival at lunch, she despatched Charlotte with a note to specifically be given to Mr Sidney Parker. Esther offered her the use of the carriage but Charlotte declined, a walk would give her the strength once again to face Sidney. Charlotte set off towards the town, she would also have some time to speak with Mary who had been so quiet upon Charlotte’s return. 

Charlotte reached the town and made her way to Trafalgar House. She knocked the door and entered, she made her way into the office to wait for Sidney, when Mary came in.

“Charlotte, I am so glad to see you, how is your stay at Sanditon House, I hope that Lady Denham is proving to be a gracious host. Please seat down with me”. Mary asked kindly. 

“Lady Denham and Lord and Lady Babington have been the most gracious hosts, I have a note for Mr Sidney Parker from her ladyship, she wishes some of the books to look over before luncheon.” Charlotte said looking around the room anxiously. 

As she said this, the door was opened and footsteps made their way through the house. 

Sidney stopped in his tracks, there sitting before him was Charlotte, for a moment he forgot himself and did not notice Mary also in the room. They stared at one another for what felt like an age. Charlotte rose from her seat.

“Good morning Mr Parker, Lady Denham has asked me to pass you this note, she requires some books before the luncheon today, I am to return with them, if you could arrange this.” Charlotte straightened her back and held her head high. 

Sidney smiled slightly, he knew she was trying to hold herself together as much as he was, and this brought him the slightest of comforts. 

“Of course, Miss Heywood, please give me a moment” Sidney turned to look at the note and proceeded to his desk. Mary and Charlotte continued to talk, with Charlotte promising tea with her and the children soon. 

“These are the books Lady Denham requires Miss Heywood, please let me take these for you, or you can take our carriage”. 

“No thank you Mr Parker, I like to walk, it clears the mind”. Charlotte smiled as Sidney handed her the books, I can see myself out, Mary I will see you soon, Good Day Mr Parker”. 

As she walked towards the front door a voice came from the stairs. 

“Ah Miss Heywood, what a surprise to see you here.” Eliza said bitterly. 

“Mrs Campion” Charlotte curtsied and bowed her head, she turned to leave. 

“I am unsure what you hope to achieve Miss Heywood, but as I told you once before, I never see the point in entering a race unless you plan on winning it, and I do believe this particular race is won”. 

Charlotte looked at Eliza, she should turn and walk out of the door but again Charlotte held her head high and proceed to speak to Eliza Campion. 

“Love, Mrs Campion is neither a race to be won or a thing to be bought. Good Day” and with that she turned and left.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I would like to say a few thank you's before this long chapter. Firstly to Mia, a fellow sister who is kindly goes over my work whilst also busy with her own life. She is a wonderful human to whom I am so grateful.
> 
> Secondly I would like to say thank you to everyone who takes the time to read this story and comments to let me know that you are enjoying the story. Its a very personal thing to try and create a story that you hope people will like and I am very lucky to have you all enjoy it so much. 
> 
> This is a little bit of a long chapter and I hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 12

Eliza stood stunned on the stairs, how dare that little upstart speak to me in that tone she thought angrily. She would talk to Sidney today, she wanted out of this town and to start their life in London. Once he was away from that little farm girl, his infatuation would end and he would see that they belonged together. As she turned from the step, she saw Mary standing in front of her with a thunderous look on her face.

“Charlotte Heywood is a friend of this family, she is welcome in my home at any time and if you cannot be civil towards her then I suggest Mrs Campion, that you return to London or find alternative accommodation.” Mary said angrily. Mary walked past her and turned onto the stairs, as Eliza went to walk away Mary spoke again.

“Be grateful that it was I that overheard your little comment and not Sidney, he would not have been half as gracious as I have been if he had.” Mary continued up the stairs.

Eliza stood there, shocked. So, it seems that the little farm girl has hoodwinked this entire family she thought. Well, she didn’t need the Parker’s, they needed her and it was about time they remembered that. She made her way to the office and she saw Sidney sitting at the desk. He looked tired, like he had not slept in an eternity. This place was draining him and she needed to get them both back to London as soon as possible.

“Sidney, I think we need to talk about our return to London. I am willing to release the funds before we are wed so that we can move forward with our lives in London. I am sure Tom and Mr Stringer can look after things here, for this is not your responsibility, our new life should be your primary focus now,” Eliza said confidently.

“Mr Stringer will not deal with Tom, and Lady Denham has made it quite clear that she would like me to stay to see through the building works. I told you this, if you wish to return to London then please do. I will join you when I can.” Sidney said, not even bothering to look up from the books he had been studying.

“I had hoped that we could move our wedding forward, we have so much time to catch up on, and this house is so crowded with everyone free to come and go as they please. We have barely seen each other since I arrived.”

Sidney knew that she was referring to Charlotte’s presence in the house, and her connection with the building project through Lady Denham. Part of him knew it would be the sensible thing, to return to London and oversee from there, but the thought of seeing Charlotte for that little bit longer, however selfish that may be, made him want to stay.

“No, I have made a promise and I will not break it. You are welcome to stay or return as you see fit Eliza, I am grateful for you coming to our aid however I have to keep my word, which at the moment seems the hardest thing to do. If you will excuse me, I need to change before we leave.”

And with that Sidney left the room. Eliza stood there furious. She would make her case to Lady Denham today, surely, she will understand that it was not Sidney that got them in to this mess and he should not be made to pay for his brothers’ lack of business sense.

Sanditon House was as busy as ever, with Lady Denham overseeing in her usual general-like manner, Charlotte decided to take the time to look some more within the library. She loved this room, she felt at peace with the books around her. As she was looking at the vast collection Esther entered the room.

“There you are, I thought you may try to escape today’s luncheon,” She smiled kindly at her.

“Of course not, I am looking forward to seeing my friends.”

“Charlotte, I know seeing Sidney with that woman is hard for you, but some things just need time to sort themselves out. Sometimes, everything can change in an instant, have faith,” Esther said, trying to make the next few hours a little easier.

Charlotte smiled at her friend. “I think some things, once in motion cannot be broken, but we must try to accept that and move on. Thank you for your kind words, but I am resolved to the situation. Mr Parker and I are acquaintances, at one point we may have been friends, but fate it seems did not share the same vision.” It was hard for Charlotte to express her feelings to anyone when it came to Sidney.

Esther looked at Charlotte, she had seemed so happy at the ball that evening, Babington had told her Sidney planned to propose, but the evening went from bad to worse. Esther did not think either of them deserved to be without one another because of other people’s mistakes, and she was going to work her hardest to help make it happen. She had seen what being in love with the wrong person nearly did to her own life, and despite Sidney’s best efforts, Charlotte had broken through that hard exterior that he presented to the world and he deserved to be happy.

“Well, I presume people will start arriving soon, we must make sure we are ready to greet the guests. I can imagine Tom Parker does not want to be left at the mercy of my Aunt.”

They both linked each other’s arm and walked towards the door of the library. Esther stopped, feeling a little faint and gripped Charlotte’s arm to steady herself.

“Are you okay Esther?” She asked worried for her friend.

“Yes, I am quite alright, just a little light headed, no fuss needed.”

Charlotte looked at her friend, not wanting to pry. She was sure there was something to Dr Fuchs’ visit but she knew Esther would tell her in her own time.

Georgiana arrived at Trafalgar House, she made her way to the parlour to wait for the others, and she found Eliza sitting alone.

“Ah Georgiana, well met, you must come and sit, we have not yet got to know one another,” Eliza said gesturing the seat opposite her.

Georgiana sat down and stared at Eliza, she remembered hearing her father talk about Sidney’s lost love, but the woman before her was not what she expected.

“As you are Sidney’s ward I feel it is best that we get to know one another.”

“Why?” Georgiana asked.

“Excuse me?” Eliza said feeling a little taken aback.

“Exactly what I say, why do we need to get to know one another? Do you intend on inviting me to live with the two of you?” Georgiana was challenging Eliza; Esther was not the only one who could play these games.

“Well, I am sure that is something that Sidney and I would have to discuss, but I am sure a girl of your age and means would like some independence?” Eliza replied.

Georgiana smiled, “I am not sure that’s what Sidney would want.”

“And what is it that you presume I would not want Georgiana?” Asked Sidney as he entered the room.

“Oh nothing, just Mrs Campion and I discussing womanly things,” Georgiana said staring at Eliza, almost daring her to repeat her comment. At that point Tom and Mary also entered the room.

“The carriage awaits, shall we?” Sidney gestured for everyone to leave.

As they made their way to Sanditon House, Sidney noticed the atmosphere in the carriage. Everyone seemed to be almost on edge. Tom and Mary had hardly spoken a word to each other for weeks, Georgiana stared out of the window to avoid any eye contact with Eliza and Sidney thought Eliza seemed fit to burst forth with anger at any moment. This should make for an enjoyable afternoon he thought. The carriage ride seemed to take an age but eventually they arrived. Outside, Lord Babington was waiting to greet them.

“Welcome! Welcome everyone! Please come through, Esther and Lady Denham are waiting for you.”

Everyone made their way into the house, Babington and Sidney looked at one another with a silent good luck!

In the main room Lady Denham was seated with Esther beside her, ready to greet everyone. Esther rose to welcome everybody. As Sidney entered the room, he could see that Mr Stringer had already arrived and was seated talking to Charlotte. He tried to ignore the irritation that seemed to niggle at him.

“Thank you all for joining us today, Mrs H, our housekeeper has us to a tight schedule therefore I think we should make our way into the dining room.” Instructed Esther.

As they made their way into the room Charlotte could feel Sidney’s eyes immediately fall on her. She had been talking with Mr Stringer when the party entered the room. It seems he had been invited so that Lady Denham could speak with him about his plans and ideas he had for the town, and also Esther has asked for his opinion on a project she had in mind. Charlotte tried not to look at Sidney, but their eyes immediately locked together. For a small moment everyone in the room seem to disappear and it was just the two of them. Luckily Esther’s voice brought them back down to earth, and she rose from her seat to greet her friends and to escort Georgiana into the dining room.

“Your names are all marked on the table, please take your seats,” ordered Lady Denham.

Charlotte was seated next to Georgiana and directly opposite Sidney, who was seated next to Mary. Mrs Campion was closest to Lady Denham with Tom directly across from her. Esther and Lord Babington were at the other end of the table. The servants entered the room and the first course was served, and there was general chatter around the table. When the main course was served, Lady Denham decided to take the conversation in a more serious direction.

“So, Mr Stringer, how are the buildings coming along, progressively I hope?”

“Yes, M’lady as much as we can given the change of weather and the winter coming soon. I mentioned to Mr Parker that we would be able to fix the inside and as much as we can do to the outside until the weather turns in the winter,” explained Mr Stringer.

“Good, good. I am happy that someone has some forethought for this plan. And you Miss Lambe! I do believe that you have had some ideas also, do you care to share them?”

Georgiana looked at Charlotte, who with a quick nod of her head encouraged Georgiana to speak out.

“Thank you, Lady Denham. I have spoken with Mr Stringer about making more room at the school, to include an extra classroom for the older children. I also think Sanditon would be benefit from being more of a family town rather than for those from London.”

At this statement Tom scoffed. Lady Denham in an instant turned head to look at him.

“You disagree Mr Parker?”

“Well, yes Lady Denham I do. What we need is the beau monde, they render a place fashionable in an instant, and they spend money. That’s what Sanditon needs.”

“Why are you so obsessed with the London beau monde? It seems to me they flit from one place to another, moving on when they become bored and restless. Sanditon could become a place where families come to have fun with each other. For annual cricket matches and regattas where they all get to join in and have their own teams, and create some memories for their children.” Georgiana spoke so passionately that when she finished she noticed that Sidney was looking at her and smiling.

“I think that’s a wonderful idea,” said Charlotte quietly.

“Well, Miss Lambe I am impressed, you seem to have given this a great deal of thought. Mrs Campion, what are your ideas?” Lady Denham said. The entire table looked at Eliza Campion.

“I am not sure of your meaning Lady Denham, I am sure that any idea Sidney has will be sufficient.”

“Really? Well that is disappointing! The fact I am considering letting you invest, or more to the point having you fix Tom Parker’s mess, I thought you would have more ideas than just referring to Mr Sidney Parker,” Lady Denham replied scathingly.

“I am sorry Lady Denham, I am not sure of your meaning, you say you are considering my offer of investment? Sidney led me to believe that you had no other option!” Eliza defiantly replied.

“That’s where Mr Parker made his mistake. You are not the only person at this table with money. There is another heiress with more money than any of us that seems to have given more thought to the town than its new possible investor. I am not sure what the women of London have to do with decisions of their money but I can assure you Sanditon women ensure they know their investments intimately.”

Everyone knew who Lady Denham was referring to. Charlotte dared to look into Sidney’s direction and she was not surprised by the look on his face, he was furious. Charlotte looked around the table and had the horrible feeling that this conversation had been had before this luncheon, but Sidney had not been privy to it.

“Georgiana’s fortune is not up for debate Lady Denham. If I had wanted her to invest I would have asked her, she is too young to tie her money up in this project.”

“It’s my money, and I do believe that I should have a say in what I do with it! My age should not matter! I come of age in a few short months, why should I have to wait to make an investment I actually believe in?”

Charlotte expected Sidney to explode with anger, but she was more than surprised when it was Mrs Campion who spoke next.

“What I think Sidney means Georgiana, is that you are far too young to make such decisions and surely you want to travel.” Eliza sweetly smiled at Georgiana, who at this point was becoming extremely angry.

“What business is it of yours what I do with my money? You may be marrying Sidney but that does not give you any right to comment on my life. However, whether I stay in Sanditon or travel I will be as far as I can be away from you! Something I am sure you would be agreeable to judging by your questions earlier!” Georgiana replied.

“Georgiana, we have had this discussion and I will not allow you to do this whilst your money is in my care. However, what you choose to do when you come of age is your decision. But it will not be fixing my family’s failings I can assure you of that. I don’t wish to discuss this again. Eliza, Georgiana is my ward and I would be grateful if you did not discuss her living arrangements without my presence.” Sidney finished any hope of discussion with that statement.

“Well Lady Denham, that was a lovely lunch and I am sure that everyone agrees,” said Lord Babington diplomatically.

Sidney stood up. You could feel the anger coming from him. He knew he had been accosted at this dinner and he was not happy at being cornered.

“Lady Denham, I promised you that I would restore those buildings and repair our family’s relationship and you have my word I will make that happen. However, I can assure you that Georgiana will not be the benefactor for my brother’s folly. Thank you for the luncheon, and your gracious company but I feel it is time that we left.”

Lady Denham smiled and nodded, “You are most welcome Mr Parker, I do have one request. That you visit with me tomorrow, alone.”

Sidney nodded and gestured for his family to follow him. He made his way to his carriage and the Parkers left Sanditon House. Georgiana opted to stay for a while longer, for she had no wish to share a carriage with Sidney at the moment.

They arrived at Trafalgar House and entered the warm parlour. Tom and Mary had walked to the school to fetch the children.

“Please ensure you get yourself together before we return to London Sidney, I am quite tired of your emotional outbursts and cold attitude,” Eliza said.

Sidney looked at her and replied “Don’t worry Mrs Campion, I will. I have a bargain to uphold.” He turned to walk out of the door, when she replied;

“Is that what you told your little farm girl? That it was a bargain?” Eliza glared at him.

Sidney froze. He slowly turned his head slightly to look at her. In a measured voice he said “Do not ever mention her to me again, do you understand?” and turned to leave once more.

Eliza was angry, “how dare you, how dare any of you? I have quite had my fill of this insipid little town and the people in it!”

“Those people are my friends and family. Be careful of how you speak of them,” Sidney replied.

“How I speak of them? Do you have any idea what I have endured since coming here? They have made it very clear that I am not welcome, yet you do and say nothing! Well I do not covet their approval and once we are back in London we shall be among more suitable friends and we can have our own family.”

“You really think that don’t you? That we can go to London, parade around the society that you deem acceptable and we will be the people we were all those years ago. You told me once that you were still the same girl but I alas, am not the same man.”

Sidney continued on, not pausing to give her time to answer. He needed to say this, to get this out once and for all. The burden of this whole damn mess was becoming too much.

“I loved you once, and when you finally acknowledged me I felt there was no man in the world who could be more in love than I. Then you chose another. I could understand wanting to have more than what we had, but I asked you to trust in me, in us, that I would make something of myself.  
I would have given you everything you desired but you CHOSE another anyway. You broke my heart, and I ran as far as I could to try and ease the pain, and when I returned I was no longer that boy.”

Eliza stepped towards him, “and now we have a chance to repair all that hurt.”

Sidney stepped back, “I will admit that I thought that not so long ago, when I saw you at the ball I couldn’t believe it. I was swept up in seeing you again. But I realised the more time we spent together that we are not the same people anymore, and for me at least those feelings are gone. I don’t mean to be cruel Eliza but I will not lie. I am ashamed of myself. I asked for your hand for the same reasons you accepted another’s all those years ago and now I have sentenced Charlotte to the same fate as I faced. No amount of time and space will ever heal that guilt, but be very assured, that at this time and for all of eternity it will be her, it will always be her.”

Eliza defiantly refused to accept this. She looked at Sidney, she would not have this, she’d had enough of Lady Denham, Mary, Georgiana and especially that jumped up little girl. “I want to leave this town soon Sidney, and as you say, you will keep up your side of the bargain.”

Sidney stormed out of the room and went to his bedroom, he lay on his bed, a somewhat relief washed over him. He knew Eliza would never release him, and no matter the history between them he would never cause her a scandal by leaving her. Yet in his heart he knew that he was no better than Eliza, he had done the same thing whether the reasons were different or not. He was repulsed, sad, lost….

He was broken.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A small chapter this time, the aftermath of the luncheon. Its mainly our two heartbroken characters. I thought it would be interesting to see Charlotte experience the pain that Sidney did the first time and for Sidney to be more emotional. 
> 
> Thanks as always to my sounding board Mia xxx

Chapter 13

After a short while, Charlotte bid Georgiana goodbye and decided to accompany Esther and Mr Stringer to Denham Place. As they walked towards the house, Charlotte walked behind Esther and Mr Stringer as they talked about plans and her mind drifted to the luncheon. She was very surprised at Lady Denham’s reluctance to immediately accept Mrs Campion’s investment. With Sanditon needing the capital she assumed it would be welcome. It was Georgiana that Charlotte felt the most pity for. It was obvious to all that she had put so much effort into her ideas, and yet Sidney would not even listen to her, and Tom was still stuck in his own world, obsessed with the high society of London.   
Sidney seemed to be so angry at the mere suggestion of Georgiana’s involvement, and Charlotte felt a little responsible for encouraging her to express her ideas, but as Georgiana had told her about their burgeoning friendship she thought it would have been welcome. Charlotte had done all she could during the luncheon to avoid any contact with Sidney, but they found themselves stealing small glances at one another. She found herself wanting to speak to him, to challenge him but that was not her place anymore. Mrs Campion would be the one to offer her advice now, and even though she loathed to admit it, it hurt her. 

They arrived at Denham Place and went inside. It was the first time that Charlotte had ever been to Esther’s previous home, it was a dark interior, with a winding stair that seemed to ascend forever. Charlotte let her hand glide along the peeling paintwork. Despite the disrepair, the artwork was beautiful, and therefore she was shocked when she heard Esther’s instruction to Mr Stringer. 

“All of it, rip it out and start again. I would like bright colours, and the entrance hall to be white with gold running up the stairs. Mr Stringer, please go upstairs and see what you can do with the rooms, myself and Charlotte shall wait outside,” Esther said. 

Charlotte followed Esther outside and stood in silence whilst she stared at the house. 

“I want to make this place a home, somewhere bright and welcoming. It has been a place of darkness and deceit for too long.”

“Will you live there yourself?” Charlotte asked. 

Esther smiled, “No, absolutely not, but I have this place in mind for someone else. More importantly when something is rotten, cut it out.”

Charlotte searched Esther’s face, and then she realised she had seen that look on her mothers’ face before, the urgency to ensure everything around you was clean and ready. She did not say anything as she was sure Esther would want to tell her in her own time. 

Mr Stringer joined them and he told Esther that he could start work once most of the apartments from the fire had been cleaned out. He would have Fred oversee the work and he would have the drawings and the plans to her in the next few days. They all walked back to Sanditon House, and Mr Stringer bid the two ladies goodbye. 

“I am quite tired Charlotte; please excuse me I will rest before dinner.” 

Charlotte insisted on escorting Esther to her room, and then went to her own room. She tried to rest, then read, but her mind wandered to the luncheon, to Sidney. His eyes, those deep eyes looking at her. Charlotte decided to go for a walk, she needed air to clear her mind.

Walking along the beach Charlotte looked out to the sea, and in that moment, she realised why Sidney boarded a boat and set sail across the world. The pain of heartache was at times too much. Feelings of anger and hurt rose in Charlotte, tears formed in her eyes and she threw her head back. It felt as if she was descending into madness, to stay in a place so close to the one who stirred such feelings, it was most definitely madness. Then she heard her name, a deep soft voice spoke to her. 

“Charlotte...Miss Heywood”

Charlotte turned around and there he was, he looked at her with concern at the tears flowing down her face. Sidney offered his handkerchief, and gestured towards some rocks nearby and without speaking she followed him. They sat there for a few moments in silence. Sidney was the first to speak. 

“Are you quite well?” he enquired. 

“Yes, thank you,” Charlotte replied, looking down at the fabric in her hand. 

“I needed some air, I like to walk by the water...” he told her. 

“It feels too much sometimes does it not? Being so close to one another? I know I should not speak in such a way to you, but there is no-one else that understands.” Sidney stared ahead as he said this, not daring to look at her. 

“Our paths are chosen for us now, and we must make the best of it,” Charlotte said sadly. 

“I will ask one thing of you though, if I may?” she said. 

“Anything” he replied, looking into her eyes.

“Speak with Georgiana, even if you do not agree with her, listen to her, do not throw away all the progress you have made,” Charlotte said.

Sidney smiled, it was typical of Charlotte, she asked of nothing for herself but something to ease the pain of another and he was powerless to refuse her. 

“I will visit her as you ask. I will not change my mind, but you are right as you so often are. I do not wish to ruin the friendship we have made.”

They smiled at one another, neither of them wanting to be the first one to leave. 

“May I escort you back to Sanditon House?” Sidney said, hoping she would accept his offer. 

Charlotte hesitated, she wanted nothing more than to spend more time with him.

“No, thank you I am quite able to make my way back. Good day Mr Parker.” Charlotte handed the piece of fabric she held so tightly back to him. 

“Please keep it. A small piece of me to keep with you.” Sidney smiled at her. 

Charlotte nodded her head, and slowly walked away, forcing herself not to look back him. The tears once again flowed down her face, and she gripped the cloth in her hand. She realised in that moment, she wasn’t unhappy or sad, she was broken. 

Sidney watched Charlotte leave, he was surprised when he saw her standing on the shore and at first, he intended to leave immediately but he could not drag himself away. Then he saw her crying, he knew he was the reason behind those tears, the cause of her pain so he went to her. He could not comfort her the way he wanted, to put his arms around her and pull her close to him. He sat with her, he knew he could offer no words that would ease their suffering, and in that moment, he decided to be honest with her. He knew he shouldn’t, it was not the proper thing to do but he was sick and tired of doing what was expected and proper. For a few minutes at least, he wanted it to be just about the two of them.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter of the aftermath of the conversation on the beach. For me Season 2 is more of Sidney's story and Season 1 was Charlotte's. I wanted to make their characters flip and have Charlotte feel what Sidney felt all those years ago. 
> 
> I want to thank Mia the Magic proof reader - she is amazing!!
> 
> and again I want to thank you all for all the kind comments, I have read everyone of them and it keeps me inspired to keep going. Each one of the comments is very much appreciated.

Chapter 14   
Eliza sat in her room after luncheon and watched from the window as Sidney stormed from the house. She was furious, she'd had enough of this town, his family, all of it. She would allow one more week and then she would demand that they return to London or she would withdraw her investment. Despite Lady Denham’s extremely vocal disapproval of her, it was not a lady’s job to concern herself with the everyday work of builders and manual labourers. She was happy in her world.   
Georgiana paced the floor in her room, she knew Esther’s plan would not work. Sidney was never going to listen to her, despite even the old dragon on her side. Well, for once she was not going to accept the decisions made for her. Georgiana left her room and was going to Trafalgar House. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she saw Sidney standing before her. 

“May I speak with you?” Sidney said. 

“How convenient I wish to speak with you.” Georgiana said walking straight into the parlour. 

Sidney went to speak, but Georgiana began immediately.

“I thought we had begun to understand one another, become friends even. You told me I could have some say in where I was to live, and make my own life, but it seems now that is only if you agree and if it suits your plans. You lied to me yet again.” Georgiana turned her back when she had finished. 

“I am grateful to you, even if you do not believe me, and you are right, I should have swallowed my pride that night and asked for your help. But it would have felt like a betrayal to your father.”

Georgiana turned to look at him, he could see how angry she was, and his explanation was not good enough for her. 

“And your excuse for continuing to refuse my offer? You embarrassed me earlier, I have ideas and I can make a home here, a place for myself! Do you have any idea how hard this has been for me, in this strange place and yet you continue to refuse me? Why will you not let me help you?”

“Because it would make no difference now,” Sidney said defeated. 

“What do you mean? If we use my money, and I have more than Mrs Campion, she is no longer needed here.”

“No Georgiana. Now please can we forget this subject?” 

“I WANT TO KNOW WHY!” she shouted at Sidney.

“Eliza will never let me go, even if Lady Denham refuses her money, I am still tied to her and you would be tied to this place. You should take your money and live the life you want. I know that you are trying to help both Charlotte and I, and I thank you with all my heart, but Eliza is the only one who can release me and I can assure you she will never do that.” 

Georgiana looked Sidney and she now knew the reason as to why he was so angry at the luncheon. It was not with her but with himself, the situation. There was no more she could say to him, but she was going to do all that she could to make Mrs Campion reconsider her position. Instead of going home as he should have, Sidney decided to go and have a drink in peace, he had no wish to go home to Trafalgar House. 

Mary, Tom and Eliza had dinner together, and Eliza retired early to her room. Tom found Mary looking out of window into the street. 

“I think he will be at the Inn, if it is Sidney you are hoping to see,” Tom said as he stood behind her. 

“I had hoped he would have joined us for dinner, but I believe it is all becoming too much for him. He does not sleep, he hardly eats. I think this is different from last time Tom.”

“I will go and look for him if it will give you some peace Mary,” said Tom. 

Tom left Trafalgar House and went to the Inn. He asked the owner if he had seen his brother and he pointed to the corner. There was Sidney, nursing a bottle of wine. 

“And that’s the second bottle he has had Mr Parker,” said the Inn Keeper. 

Tom thanked him and went to Sidney’s table, it did not take Tom long to realise that Sidney was drunk. It took Sidney a minute to register who was standing before him. 

“Ah my big brother come to rescue to me again, sit down Tom, take a drink with me,” slurred Sidney. 

“Sidney, I think that is quite enough, maybe you should come home?” Tom asked as he sat to face to Sidney. 

“Home for what? To speak with a woman I sold myself to or to sit in a chair and think about the woman I actually love? Which one would you like me to do Tom? Which one would benefit your precious town?” Sidney asked. 

Tom winced at Sidney’s words. Up until now he had thought that Mary’s worries had been exaggerated, but looking at Sidney in this state and hearing him speak of the woman he loved, Tom started to realise the depths of Sidney’s despair. Tom sat down opposite his brother and looked at the man before him. Mary was right, he looked tired and so desperately sad. 

“Why Tom, why?” Sidney suddenly asked. 

“Why what brother?”

“Why did you take all those chances, and put all of us at risk? Your own family, and more importantly Mary and the children! Do you have any idea how lucky you are? To be with the woman you love, to have a family, a place to call your home? And you threw it away for people who do not give a damn about you.” Sidney looked at his brother, shook his head and continued to empty the glass in front of him.

“That’s enough now Sidney, I am taking you home. Mary is worried about you and I promised to bring you back, so please come with me, if not for me then for her,” Tom said standing up and taking his brothers arm. 

Tom helped Sidney walk to Trafalgar House, they entered and Tom took Sidney to his room and helped him onto the bed. Hopefully the drink will help him get some sleep, thought Tom as he stood looking at his younger brother. He covered him with the blanket and left his room. Tom decided to go back downstairs. It would be his turn not to sleep tonight. 

Tom fixed himself a drink and stood in front of the large model of Sanditon. He had such grand plans, he wanted to build something to be proud of but at what cost? It seemed it had cost his brother’s life and happiness. He walked away from the model, no longer being able to look at it. He sat in front of the fire and watched the flames burn, he let the words Sidney said run through his mind when he heard a small voice behind him. 

“Tom, are you ok?” said Mary as she walked towards him. She stood at the fireplace, looking at her husband. 

“I am so sorry Mary, I put everything before you, the children, this whole family. I have condemned Sidney to a miserable existence. I just wanted to make something to be proud of,” said Tom, unable to look at Mary. 

“You already have something to be proud of. You have a family that loves and supports you, and you put that at risk and I will not absolve you of the trouble you have brought upon us. However, Tom, there is time to put it right although I am not sure how, but we can try, together.” Mary knelt beside Tom and took his hand. She could not bring herself to forgive him entirely, not yet, but she would stand by him as she always had. 

Tom looked gratefully at his wife as she held her hand out to him. He had a long way to go to regain her trust, he knew that but he promised himself that he would do everything he could to prove to her that he was worthy.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thought as I was in the mood I would try an upload as much as I could for you with the help of the awesome Mia being my soundboard. 
> 
> A few questions answered in this one, and peoples personalities are brought to the forefront. 
> 
> Enjoy

Chapter 15  
Eliza woke early the next morning, and as she rose she looked out to the street below, already the streets were busy. No doubt Sidney would be already at work, but today she would speak with him. Firstly, she wanted to visit with Georgiana, it seems that her relationship with Sidney was closer than Eliza originally thought. Maybe she could convince Georgiana to come to London and therefore Sidney would follow. She would tolerate the girl until she came into her fortune. With her plan in mind Eliza readied herself for the day.   
Everyone was in the dining room when Eliza entered, Tom and Sidney stood to welcome her. 

“Good morning everyone. Sidney, I did not hear you return from your walk yesterday,” said Eliza. 

“The fault lies with me Mrs Campion, I had persuaded Sidney to accompany me to the Inn, I am afraid we indulged too much,” Tom lied without looking at Sidney. 

“Ah, well we must allow the men some free time, do you not think Mary?” answered Eliza. 

Mary smiled and nodded. Sidney looked at his brother. He was unsure as to why Tom felt the need to lie on his behalf but he was grateful for not having to explain to Eliza the reason he was drowning his sorrows. Breakfast continued in quiet conversation. When Tom and Mary left the room, Eliza informed Sidney of her plans for the day. 

“I plan to visit Georgiana today, I feel that we have not got off on the best foot. I know that she is very important to you, and will soon be part of our family.” 

“Well, I wish you luck Eliza you may need it. I have a meeting with Lady Denham this morning and I am unsure what time I will return. I am sure you can occupy yourself until this afternoon.” Sidney rose from the table, collected his coat and left the house. 

Eliza left Trafalgar House and made her way to see Georgiana. She was escorted in to the parlour and waited for Georgiana. After what seemed like an age, Georgiana entered the room with a wary look on her face. 

“Mrs Campion, how can I help you?” asked Georgiana. 

“I have come to settle things between us, I feel that we have not got off on the right foot and I would very much like to correct that if you will allow it.”

Georgiana looked at Mrs Campion. This was the last thing she expected however this provided Georgiana with an opportunity to ask some questions of her own. 

“Why do you want to marry Sidney?” 

“Excuse me?” said Eliza, shocked. 

“I would like to know why you want to marry Sidney, you seem to hate Sanditon and I cannot see that you are fond of the Parker’s or myself. So why?” Georgiana asked. 

Eliza stood there stunned. She had never expected to be asked such a question, least of all by the wild and uncontrollable ward that Sidney had been landed with. 

“I came here to try and resolve our differences and I am met with your insolent questions. I do not have to answer you or anyone else about my relationship with Sidney. I think I made a mistake coming here today. Good day Georgiana.” Eliza stormed out of the room and the house. 

Georgiana stood there smiling, she knew that Mrs Campion would never answer her question, but she took her chance anyway. Hopefully her question will have some effect. She knew that Mrs Campion would be furious enough to tell Sidney, and Georgiana was hoping that Sidney would press for an answer. With that Georgiana decided to go and see Mary and the children but first she wanted to write a letter. 

Sidney had decided to walk to Sanditon House that morning. The walk would hopefully clear his head, which despite the first full night of sleep he'd had in what seemed like an age, he was still feeling somewhat ill from the previous evening. He did not mean to consume so much wine but the more he had drunk the less his heart seemed to hurt. Even though he had to endure a morning with Lady Denham, he found himself looking forward to seeing Charlotte. He knew that it was a selfish feeling and it caused them both pain but he could bear that to have a moment to look upon her beautiful face, to hear her voice. That was worth the deepest pain. 

Sidney arrived at Sanditon House and was shown into the library. After a while Lady Denham came in. 

“Ahh Mr Parker, good, glad you could make it, take a seat we have much to discuss.”

“Lady Denham, I would first like to apologise for my outburst yesterday. As you can imagine this has been a source of conversation for what seems an age and it was rude of me to behave in such a manner,” Sidney said before he sat down.

Lady Denham was quiet at first as she studied Sidney, then her opinion came. 

“Your outburst yesterday was not directed at me Mr Parker therefore you have no apology to make. I think it is your brother who owes you the apology. It seems his foolishness has led you down a dark path. However, I have come to a decision about Mrs Campion’s investment. I reject it,” said Lady Denham in a tone that dared Sidney to disagree. 

“Without Mrs Campion’s investment we have no hope of recovering the money you have already invested or repairing the apartments.” 

“I am going to accept Miss Lambe’s proposal and money and Babington has also offered to invest. Therefore the risk to Miss Lambe will not be as large as you once thought. If you reject this, then Babington will invest more along with myself, and we will then approach Miss Lambe once she comes of age. Eliza Campion has no place in this town or its future, but I think you already know this.”

Sidney did not know what to say, he wasn’t sure he had the energy to keep fighting it. Georgiana was determined to have her way and Lady Denham seemed to be intent on keeping Eliza from being part of the town. 

“One more thing Mr Parker, what were the terms of you loan from Mrs Campion? I assume you went to her for a loan and she added the engagement as a perk for herself.” 

Sidney had never told the story to anyone of what had happened during his time in London, but he did not think Lady Denham would let him leave unless she was satisfied and got the answer she wanted. 

“I had tried every bank in town. I even considered selling our London Home but it would not have raised enough to cover all the costs, so I went to Eliza. At first, she assumed that I was there to rekindle our relationship. I explained the situation and offered her a business plan but she refused. She said that as a widow she could not lend a man so much money without security and I was that security. So, I agreed. I sold myself to the highest bidder it seems,” Sidney said, feeling somewhat ashamed. 

Sensing this Lady Denham took a moment before she spoke. 

“People often marry for money, I did myself and I had a good life. But I am surprised at you Mr Parker. Your devotion to your family surprises me, you are not the worthless layabout I thought you were. As for your choice of bride, it may have suited the younger Sidney Parker but that boy no longer exists, does he? No, you need a woman who can challenge you, one that makes you think about your actions and way of life. It’s a shame there is no such person for you. Or am I mistaken?” It seemed as if Lady Denham was almost challenging Sidney to admit his feelings for another. 

As Sidney was about to answer, another entered the room. 

“Ahh Miss Heywood, there you are. I would be grateful if you could accompany Mr Parker back to town, I have some letters for you to post and I think that there must be work that Mr Parker needs help with. So off you two go. Thank you again Mr Parker, I will leave it to you to tell Miss Lambe the good news. Now if you will excuse me, I have a party to plan.”  
And with that Lady Denham gestured for them to leave. 

Charlotte and Sidney walked in silence for a while, the openness of their conversation yesterday seemed to hang over them. Charlotte decided she could not walk the entire way in silence.

“Did you have a chance to speak with Georgiana yesterday?” 

“Yes, I took your advice and as usual you were right, Georgiana and I in fact had a very open and honest conversation. Hopefully we can keep on building our friendship. After my conversation with Lady Denham it appears that I am overruled somewhat.” Sidney smiled as he said this. 

“I am pleased, and I know Georgiana will be too. We sometimes forget how it must be for her, in a strange country and to be the topic of people’s interest, but I do think her ideas are excellent and will make sure a part of this town for a long time. At least when you return to London you will know that she is amongst family and friends, surely that will be of some comfort for you. Do you know when you will return to London?” Charlotte asked. 

“I would still like to see the projects through and be here for Georgiana also, at least in the beginning of her new adventure. I am in no rush to return to London, I prefer the outlier life.” They both smiled at this, their own private joke. 

“So what plans do you have for me?” Charlotte asked. 

“Excuse me?” said Sidney a little startled. 

“Oh, I mean when we arrive at Trafalgar House. I used to help Tom with all the books and such.” Charlotte seemed a little embarrassed at the question, and when she dared to look up at Sidney, they both started to laugh. 

“I am sure I can find something for you to do” Sidney replied. 

As they walked into town they continued to talk. Sidney asked about her family and Charlotte explained that her sister Alison had taken up many of her responsibilities at the farm and her older brother was courting a young girl from the nearby village. They discussed Georgiana’s idea’s and the talent of Mr Stringer with his excellent designs. They both expressed concern for Mary and Tom all the time avoiding the reason for the conflict as they knew it was about them. They arrived at Trafalgar House, smiling and talking, both longing for it to last a little longer yet grateful for this small moment of paradise.

As they entered the house, Eliza was there waiting for Sidney, she did not even acknowledge Charlotte’s presence. 

“I need to speak with you Sidney if you please, it is important,” She said ignoring Charlotte as she walked into the parlour. 

“Miss Heywood, please go through to the office, you know where everything is, please try to make sense of what you can.” Sidney smiled at her, knowing that their moment of peace was over. 

Sidney made his way into the parlour and he noticed that Eliza seemed extremely angry. He was about to enquire what was wrong when she cut him off. 

“I will be returning to London at the end of week and I expect you to join me. We do not belong in this town and I want no more of it.” Eliza said. 

“I sense your talk with Georgiana did not go well, I did try to warn you Eliza.” Sidney tried not to smile. 

“She is the most rude, unruly young woman I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I will not tolerate her and her insolent manners in my home.” 

“Georgiana is my ward, and part of my family, and she will be welcome in any place that I live in. May I ask what happened that has made you so upset?” Sidney enquired. 

“She enquired as to why I wanted to marry you! The insolence of her! I could not believe my ears.” Eliza said, still outraged at the question. 

“Well, why do you?” Sidney asked quietly. 

Eliza looked at Sidney, she could not believe that he would ask her this. 

“I believe in us. I believe we are meant to be, that the night at the ball was meant to be, we had found each other again. I know that you say you have some small affection for Miss Heywood, but Sidney she does not know you like I do. We have a shared history, and once we are back in London, in our own little world, we can forget the problems of this town and we can finally live as we had always planned to do. I know that you do not think that at the moment, but I am sure that in time you will again feel for me what you once did before.” 

Before he could stop himself, Sidney laughed, out loud. 

“You really think that don’t you? No matter how much I tell you that I am just keeping to my side of the bargain.” Sidney searched Eliza’s face for any sign of her realising the truth of the situation but it seemed to have the opposite effect. 

“The end of the week Sidney, not a moment after.” And with that Eliza left the room. 

Sidney stood there stunned. He had no chance to tell her that her money was no longer needed, but he knew that would not matter at this moment, she would never let him go.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As this story develops I find myself drawn more Sidney's side of the story, how does a man become untangled to be with the woman he loves, we shall find out! 
> 
> Again thank you Mia, my proof reader extraordinaire. 
> 
> Also, the comments I have been receiving are so kind and generous. A few fanfic writers I know have been subjected to some awful abuse regarding their work and I am of the belief that if this isnt too your taste just move on. So to everyone who has been kind enough to read this story and stick with it, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Chapter 16 

Esther and Babington were enjoying cards in the library when the footman announced that Mr Stringer had arrived. 

“Good day Mr Stringer, are those the plans for Denham House I see with you?” Esther enquired. 

“Lord and Lady Babington, yes they are and I also have a note for you from Miss Lambe.” Mr Stringer handed the letter to Esther, and he and Lord Babington proceeded to the table to see the plans.

Esther read the letter and smiled, it seemed that Miss Lambe was taking control of the situation, although it made no mention of her Aunt’s intentions so she was unsure if Sidney had yet informed her. 

“Good news my love?” enquired Babington.

“Interesting news I would say for the time being. So, Mr Stringer, what do you have for me?” Esther asked. 

“Well Lady Babington, I think that we can lighten up the ceilings, and add a window at the entrance to shed light on that beautiful staircase. Some of the men are going in to clear out the house, so is there anything that you would like to keep?” he asked.

“No, nothing. I want it stripped from top to bottom please Mr Stringer, your plans look very good and I am happy with what you have suggested. Please send the bill for any supplies you need to the house. Now, may I offer you some refreshments? We are about to take some tea,” Esther offered. 

“No thank you, I have promised to walk with Miss Heywood today. Thank you for your offer. Good day to you both,” and with that Mr Stringer left. 

The maid brought in the tea and Esther began to pour when Babington asked her a question.

“Are you sure that you wish to do this Esther, that was your home for a long time, I would understand if you wanted to keep something from there,” Babington said lovingly.

“I see now that it was a prison, a place where I was controlled and manipulated, a place I allowed that to happen to me. I want no reminder of that George,” Esther said. 

Babington smiled at his wife. Esther never really spoke of her brother or their time in that house and Babington knew better than to pursue the subject. All he cared about was that she was happy and felt secure. 

“I do not wish to be reminded of those times, the house deserves to be cleansed of the ghosts of the past. Anyway, I am looking to the future, our future and the future of our family.” As she said this Esther’s hand went to her stomach. 

“We must tell people soon, especially your Aunt, she is very worried about you,” Babington said smiling widely at his wife. 

“Yes, you are right, although I think Charlotte has guessed our secret. We will tell Lady Denham this evening.”

In Trafalgar House, Sidney stood there and, in that moment, he was resigned to his fate. He knew that Eliza was intent on seeing the marriage through. He thought of the woman that was in the next room, she wasn’t the type of woman to make demands of anyone, especially demands of love. He wanted to put his arms around her and never let her go. He walked into the other room and observed her for a second. She was busy organising his desk, reading each piece of paper and placing them in meticulous piles. He smiled, he could stand here all day and watch her, lost in her own world. 

“You seem to be making some progress.” Sidney commented. 

Charlotte looked up at Sidney and smiled, it took his breath away. 

“Yes, some I think. I have arranged them into piles, bills to be paid and so on. I have done what I can for today but I must leave now as I have another engagement. I have promised Mr Stringer I would call on him,” Charlotte said as she moved from his desk. 

Sidney smiled and moved towards his desk, there was a feeling niggling at him. He stopped and turned to Charlotte. 

“Actually, I think I should visit Georgiana and give her the good news. We have plenty to discuss. I shall accompany you outside if you do not mind?”

They both walked towards the door and out into the fresh air. They walked together and Sidney felt like this was the most natural thing in the world. He enjoyed her easy company and he knew that the niggling feeling he had was jealousy. He was jealous that James Stringer would be the person to enjoy Charlottes company for the rest of the afternoon. As they approached Mrs Griffith’s house, James Stringer appeared. 

“Good Day Mr Parker, Miss Heywood.” He said tilting his hat. 

“Good day Mr Stringer, Miss Heywood thank you for your help today.” He turned and knocked om the door, hoping someone would answer very quickly. 

“Good day Mr Parker.” Charlotte turned and walked away with Mr Stringer. 

Mrs Griffiths answered the door and showed him into the parlour. Georgiana made him wait for what seemed an age before she walked into the parlour, yet she seemed happier than she had in a while. 

“Georgiana, how are we today? I do believe you had a visitor earlier.”

“Yes, I did, however I do not think she enjoyed it as much as I did.” She smiled brightly. 

Sidney sighed, he should be angry with her for speaking to his fiancé that way but he realised that he did not care. 

“She will be my wife, and I do not want that to affect our friendship. Now I have some good news for you. I have spoken with Lady Denham and she will be rejecting Eliza’s investment so therefore I have no option but to accept your gracious offer of help. Now I will ensure that a proper contract be drawn to ensure your investment is secure.”   
Georgiana looked at Sidney, relief washed over her. 

“Does she know? she asked. 

“Not yet, but Georgiana I can promise you it will not change anything. Eliza will not release me from this engagement. I will at some point have to leave and go to London. However, until all plans are secure and in place I will remain here,” Sidney replied. 

“Hmmm, we shall see” Georgiana replied. 

They continued to speak some more and Sidney left. Not wanting to go back to the house he decided to walk towards the seafront and on the way he met his brother, Mary and the children. 

“Uncle Sidney, father is taking us to find some shells, would you like to come?” Henry asked.

He smiled at his nephew and told him that he would love to and proceeded to walk with his family. At first, they walked along the front in silence, the children and Tom went off in search of shells, Mary and Sidney walked side by side. 

“How are you Sidney?” Mary asked. 

“I am unsure of how to answer that Mary, if I am honest” Sidney answered directly. 

“I saw you walking with Charlotte earlier, I am glad to see you are both speaking with one another,” Mary said. 

Sidney smiled. The truth was, that walk was the happiest he had been in weeks. 

“Yes, it was good to speak with her again. It was the happiest I have felt for a long time Mary,” Sidney said honestly, he trusted Mary. 

“The whole situation is just wretched Sidney, if only Tom hadn’t been so blind! If only the banks had agreed and we did not need her money,” she said sadly. 

“Ahh, yes about that. Lady Denham has refused her investment and I have agreed to allow Georgiana to invest her money before she comes of age.”

Mary was stunned, she never thought Sidney would agree to such a thing. 

“Does Mrs Campion know? Will she agree to release you from your engagement?” Mary asked hopefully. 

“I have not told her yet, but I am afraid her releasing me is quite out of the question Mary, she made this very clear today. She is convinced that once we leave Sanditon that all will be well, that we will fall into our old lives and love. She is convinced that Charlotte is nothing more than a passing folly that I will forget. How wrong she is.”

Mary put her arm through Sidney’s and continued to walk along side him in silence, she was powerless to do anything. Lady Babington had told her she had a role to play in this, and maybe her role was to be here and listen to Sidney and to advise Tom. Whatever her part was it felt like nothing at that moment. 

The Parker family walked all the way home to Trafalgar House where Eliza was waiting for them. She greeted the family but Mary did not feel like pleasantries. She greeted her with a curt nod and informed Tom and Sidney she would settle the children and be down for dinner. 

“Tom, could you give Mrs Campion and I a moment please?” asked Sidney. 

“Of course, I shall assist Mary.” And with that Tom left the couple alone. 

They went into the parlour, Eliza sat before the fire and Sidney stood before her, ready for the onslaught that would surely follow the news he was about to give. He decided direct was the best approach. 

“I have some news. I have spoken with Lady Denham and she would prefer Georgiana to invest in the town as she wants to make this her home. I do thank you for your generous offer Eliza but it is no longer needed.” Sidney hoped this would somehow encourage her to release him too. 

Eliza smiled, “Well this is good news, I only made the offer for you Sidney and now that it is no longer needed our ties to this sad little place is over, we can leave as soon as possible. Of course, we will return to visit your family, but we can shake off the responsibility and concentrate on the rest of our lives together, starting with our wedding.”

“I am afraid it is not that simple Eliza, I have given my word to Lady Denham that I would oversee the project and I am still in charge of Georgiana’s finances. I intend to keep my word,” Sidney said. 

Eliza stood up and straightened her gown. “Yes of course you must keep your word, however the work will stop soon due to the weather, and at this time we can return to London to organise our wedding and then you can come back once the building restarts.” And with that she left the room to change for dinner. 

After dinner, Eliza stated that she felt unwell and retired early and Mary went to the office to see to her correspondence. Tom poured Sidney a drink and they both sat in the parlour. 

“I am sorry Sidney, for everything,” Tom said. 

Sidney looked at his brother, who for the past few days had been very quiet and withdrawn. 

“What is done is done Tom. We cannot change it, and you are not entirely to blame. If I had not been so stubborn I would not find myself in this situation. Mistakes have been made and now we learn to live with them,” Sidney said sadly. 

“You are living with the consequences of my mistakes as well as your own, and I will forever be sorry for that. You are right, I should have never said those things about your younger years, you are my brother and it was my place and duty to help you.” Tom meant every word he said. 

“Thank you, Tom. I do appreciate your words. Yet, we must look to the future, you must stop chasing this dream of London society gracing us with their presence. It will only be a fleeting acknowledgement if they do. You should listen to Georgiana, if you want to build something lasting, some place that is for everyone from London society to a farmer and his daughters.” Sidney smiled thinking one particular farmer’s daughter. 

At Sanditon House, everyone sat in the library, Charlotte was quietly reading and Lady Denham was playing cards with Esther when Babington asked for the attention of those in the room. 

“Lady Denham, Charlotte, myself and Esther have an announcement to make. As you know Esther has been feeling a little unwell for the past couple of weeks and this is because...well…she is with child,” Babington said, beaming. 

“Oh Esther! George! I am so happy for you!” Charlotte rose to hug her friend. 

Lady Denham reached for Esther’s hand, and squeezed it tightly. 

“You will make a wonderful mother Esther, I have no doubt.” Lady Denham said softly with her eyes glistening with proud tears. 

“Thank you, both of you. Although I think Charlotte may have guessed. I am sorry we have kept it a secret, however I wanted to become used to the idea. I would be grateful if we could keep it between ourselves for now. Babington will of course tell Parker, but I would like to keep it amongst family for now.” Esther looked lovingly at her husband. 

Charlotte looked at the happy couple, she was so pleased for them, their love had survived Edward Denham’s untimely declarations at the ball, they truly belonged to one another. Charlotte decided she wanted to retire to her room. She told her friends that she was tired from all her walking today but in truth she needed sometime alone. Whilst her walk with Mr Stringer had been pleasant, she thought only of her time with Sidney. They seemed to have an ease with one another that she could not explain. When they had first met he was so angry and removed from those around him, he kept everyone at arm’s length including his family. Slowly that changed, and when it mattered he was there for all of his family. Regardless of what this had cost them both she was so proud of the man he had become and was still trying to prove himself to be. Charlotte lay in bed and tried to sleep, but her mind was full of thoughts of Sidney. His smile, his laughter. She knew that her feelings were wrong but she was looking forward to her work at the Parker house. Her time with him however brief was a secret joy to her, and now that Georgiana was to invest she knew that Sidney’s time here was going to be short. It would not be long before Mrs Campion would insist they return to London, and Charlotte was trying so very hard to break her attachment to him, but deep down inside she knew that she would hold on to it to the very last moment. 

Tom and Sidney continued talking into the evening until Sidney excused himself and retired to his room. He was glad that he and his brother were resolving their issues. Tom had once saved his life, Sidney had no choice but to save his family in return. Sidney decided to try and get some sleep, but as he lay in bed he thought of nothing but Charlotte. He remembered their kiss on the clifftop and how her lips brushed against his. The feel of her body against his, his arms wrapped around her. He could have stayed there for all of eternity. As he closed his eyes he knew that his dreams tonight would be filled with her and because of that reason he welcomed it.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The longing is getting worse, the demands are weighing heavier, there seems no way out of the darkness.......
> 
> Again thank you all for your support and comments, please know that I read every single one of them and they help to spur me on to write. 
> 
> As always thanks to my devilish friend for her unconditional support and proof reading.

• Chapter 17  
The next morning Sidney woke after his first decent sleep in weeks. He felt as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He no longer needed or wanted Eliza’s money, and although he would be married to her soon, he knew that his work in Sanditon would keep him busy for some time yet, even before the weather set in. He joined everyone for breakfast and his good mood did not go unnoticed. 

“May I ask what has you so happy this morning my dear?” enquired Eliza. 

“Nothing in particular, it’s a fine fresh day, work to be done and I have decided to pay Babington a visit. I have hardly seen him since he and Esther came to stay,” replied Sidney.   
“I shall accompany you, it would be nice for me to call on Lady Babington,” said Eliza. 

Just as Sidney was about to answer, one of the maids came though with a note. Mary took the note and then proceeded to tell everyone that they had been invited to dinner that evening at Sanditon House. Sidney was relieved, he could now excuse Eliza’s company with the premise that she would be able to speak with Esther this evening. As he began to speak Mary began first and it was if she had read his mind. 

“Mrs Campion, I need to shop for a new dress today and I would be so grateful for your advice as your taste is exquisite,” Mary said smiling. 

“Well, if Sidney is quite sure he can spare me I would be happy to,” Eliza replied.

With that Sidney excused himself from the table and left Trafalgar House. Sidney decided to ride his horse to Sanditon House. The poor beast had not had much exercise these last few weeks and he found he could not wait a moment longer to see his friend or Charlotte. As he approached the house, he saw Charlotte coming out of the door. 

“Good day Miss Heywood, you are not leaving so early?” he asked as he dismounted. 

“Good Morning Mr Parker, no I am waiting for Dr Fuch’s to arrive, I heard a horse and thought it may have been him arriving.” Charlotte replied. 

Sidney was about to ask her if she was ill when Babington came out of the house. He greeted Sidney with surprise. 

“Sidney, what the devil are you doing here at this time? Well never mind, I have some news! Esther is with child!” Babington could not conceal his delight. 

Sidney smiled at his friend and threw his arms around him. 

“Babbers that is such good news, is everything well? Miss Heywood mentioned that you are waiting for Dr Fuchs,” Sidney said with sudden concern. 

“Yes, yes everything is well, he is coming to make sure all is well with Esther, she has been feeling a little lightheaded and sick. Charlotte tells me this is normal in these situations but I wish just to make sure. Now, why don’t you two take a turn about the park whilst I wait for Dr Fuch’s and then once all is well we can have a good chat old friend.” Babington said as he practically pushed them away from the door. 

Sidney and Charlotte obliged Babington’s request and started to stroll around Sanditon Park. At first, they were quiet and content to be in each other’s company. Sidney spoke first. 

“Are you planning to visit Trafalgar House today? I am sure there is more work for you to do, I am not so organised.”

“I was, and I am planning to see Georgiana also. But I am sure Lady Denham will also have much for me to do with this evening’s festivities,” Charlotte smiled. 

“Yes, we received Lady Denham’s invitation this morning, although Georgiana and Mrs Campion being in the same room is not something I look forward to,” Sidney chuckled. 

“Yes, Georgiana is somewhat spirited in her opinions, but I truly believe she wants to make a life here, it must be awfully hard for her at times,” She said. 

“I agree, I brought her to England as her father wished it so, my plan was to introduce her to London Society but the more I spend time within it myself the more I feel she is best left out of it. I think her money is more of a prize to them. She deserves better,” He said. 

Charlotte smiled up at Sidney. He never talked openly about how he felt about Georgiana and it was good to know that he did hold deep affection for her. They continued to talk as they walked, talking about the plans for the town, and the work of Mr Stringer, when the conversation turned to what they had planned for their futures. 

“Do you have any plans to return to Willingden?” asked Sidney.

“I will at some point I suppose, but I am at Esther’s disposal at the moment, and I am enjoying being here. It feels more like home every day,” She said. 

“Yes, I agree, it is strange that I had spent so much time trying to run away and now I find myself hoping to stay, but at some stage I will have to leave,” He said sadly.

“When do you return to London?” Charlotte asked, trying to keep her voice as light as she could. 

“I will be expected to return there soon but I feel there is still much to be done. I do not want to go to London.” Sidney said in a moment of honesty. 

They looked up at one another, the unspoken truth being that they did not want to leave one another. Sidney knew their conversation was completely inappropriate, he was tied to another and he was being selfish, but he wanted to stay in Sanditon to be with her. Charlotte tried to look away from Sidney, and she knew what he was trying to tell her. As they walked along they moved closer to one another, there hands grazing as the walked. They both knew it was wrong but this stolen moment is all that they had until a voice broke them from their stolen bliss. 

“Sidney, there you are, Dr Fuch’s has gone, do you fancy a ride out? My horse could do with stretching his legs,” Babington said, oblivious to the moment he had interrupted. 

“Yes, I am at your disposal Babbers,” Sidney chuckled. “Thank you for the walk Miss Heywood.”

Charlotte smiled and bowed her head and wished the gentlemen a good day. As she entered the house, she walked into the library where Lady Denham was walking back from the window to her seat. 

“Ah Miss Heywood! You look a little flush, a good walk I take it?” Lady Denham smiled. 

“Yes Lady Denham, now how may I be of service?” Charlotte said trying to compose herself. 

“I need you to go to into town and have this letter sent to my solicitor, then I would like this order taken to the dressmaker. Then I wish you to return as we have many things to arrange for this evening and I need you to be of help to Esther. She needs to rest but will not listen. Oh and take the carriage, I think you have done enough walking for today,” said Lady Denham with a mischievous look. 

Sidney and Babington took a ride into town, Sidney smiled at the excitement in Babingtons voice when he spoke of his new joy. 

“I cannot believe that I am to be so fortunate so soon. How things have changed. I am lucky man Sidney and I am not ashamed to say it out loud.” 

Sidney smiled at his friend, he was happy for both of them, to be blessed with the person you love was a rare and beautiful thing. 

“Well, yes things have changed, for us both. You with your new family and I am finally enjoying my work, and my relationship with Georgiana has improved significantly,” Sidney replied. 

“How is your other relationship?” Babington asked nervously. 

“As you know she is no longer investing but that has not changed her mind or plans. She has demanded that we return to London, but I find myself not wanting to leave, there is so much work to be done,” Sidney said. 

“Would that change if Miss Heywood was to return to Willingden? Let us be honest my friend, the work could be organised from London, you are here for as long as she is. Is that fair? To either of you?”

Sidney thought about his answer, he could be affronted at his friends’ forthright question but that would be only to mask the truth of the answer. 

“Yes, I want to be here for as long as she is. No Babbers it’s not fair, but I am destined for a life I do not want with a woman with I do not love. At some point we will both leave this place and Charlotte will move on. If these few moments together are all that I can have then I will be selfish and I will take them.” 

Babington decided not to pursue the matter any further, Sidney was clearly in pain at the thought of never seeing Charlotte once he left for London. If only he had to come to everyone before he had gone to Mrs Campion, but his pride would never have allowed it and now the consequences will be shared between himself and Charlotte. They arrived in town and went straight to Trafalgar House. As they walked through the house, they heard voices coming from the office. Charlotte, Georgiana, Mary and Tom were all discussing plans for Sanditon once the apartments were finally restored. Georgiana was still enforcing her idea of making this a town for families to gather, every type of family with some of Dr Fuchs’ spa amenities, which she conceded had been one of Tom’s better ideas. Charlotte pointed out that Lady Denham was not sold on that idea but Georgiana was firm in her decision and she would have her say. Sidney looked into the room from the doorway at this group of people, his group of people, friends and family and realised the thought of leaving them weighed heavy on his heart. Babington put his arm on his friend’s back and forced him into the room. 

“Good day everyone.” Babbers announced their arrival to the room. 

Sidney and Charlotte locked eyes immediately and smiled at one another. Tom rose to greet Babington and thanked him for the kind invitation to dinner. Georgiana demanded Babingtons’ attention to put forth her ideas and Sidney escaped over to the desk where Charlotte was busy arranging documents and smiling at the conversations before her. 

“I see you are occupying yourself at a safe distance from the heated debate,” Sidney chuckled. 

“Yes, I believe this is the safest option, Georgiana is a force to be reckoned with and I think I will leave Tom and Lord Babington to that particular argument,” Charlotte started to laugh. 

They continued in their little groups for at least another hour. Georgiana continued her discussion, and Sidney sat at his desk pretending to work whilst trying to not to look at Charlotte, which proved to be unsuccessful. They stole glances at one another and it seemed to have gone unnoticed by everyone, but they did not see the one person observing from the hallway. Eliza had stood there and listened to their conversations but she watched intently as Sidney struggled not to look at Charlotte. She’d had enough of feeling like an unwanted guest in this house, she wanted to go home to London. 

Eliza quietly turned and went to her room. She was a wealthy woman with an excellent social standing with the highest society of London and yet her future husband seemed to completely enamoured by a little farm girl of no consequence. She knew Sidney better than anyone, she was certain that fate had brought them together again for a reason. This was their second chance. She remembered the night she had seen him at the ball. She saw him dancing with her and although she had made her enquiries as to his marital status, when she first saw Sidney dancing with her, she thought she saw something between them, but as soon as Sidney saw her he left her side to come to hers. Even when he had told her that day at the regatta that he did not feel the same way, she was sure that he was just hiding his true feelings. She had hurt him so much all those years ago, that was the reason he was so reluctant to let her back in, as he feared she would hurt him once more. Eliza was certain that once they returned to London and it was just the two of them that she could show him that nothing could tear them apart. She had decided to allow him time to get the affairs in order here and then she really must insist he return to her in London. As she heard the people downstairs start to leave the house, she felt calmer, and she now had a firm plan in mind, it was time to get herself ready for tonight’s festivities. 

Charlotte took the carriage back to Sanditon House and she sat back and closed her eyes. The rhythm of the horses and carriage relaxed her. The same image came to her head, one that was in her thoughts every day, and the one that filled her dreams every night. Sidney. The more time they spent together the easier they became in each other’s company. They seemed to gravitate to one another no matter who was in the room. She wondered if anyone ever noticed the looks that they gave one another. Charlotte felt guilt and shame, for she knew he now belonged to someone else, and she had made him promise not to talk about their feelings. Mrs Campion loved Sidney and it was his duty to honour the vows he was to make. Yet, a part of Charlotte felt sad, angry, and jealous all at the same time. It felt like a part of her heart had been stolen, never to be returned, and for her, Sanditon was not home, he was.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok, getting to a crucial point in the game - the mother of all showdowns, enjoy..

Chapter 18

Charlotte walked downstairs as soon as she was ready and went into the dining hall, the table looked beautiful. She walked along the chairs, taking a sneak peek at who she was sitting next to. There was her name in the middle of the table right next to Sidney. If she did not know better she would think that Lady Denham seemed to pushing them closer together, but for what reason Charlotte could not fathom, his future was settled, there was nothing to be done. 

“Are you happy with your seat Miss Heywood?” a voice came from the doorway, Charlotte looked up. 

“I am at your service Lady Denham, I am happy to sit any place you would wish,” Charlotte said. 

“Hmm, come through to the library, we can join Esther and George before people arrive,” she instructed. 

She accompanied Lady Denham to the library, when the fire was lit the room had the most beautiful glow, the book covers shimmered as the light from the fire danced over them. This was her favourite room in the house. Esther was sitting near the fire alone. 

“It seems I cannot sit without a blanket in case I get cold, it is going to be a long few months if he continues like this,” Esther said sarcastically. 

“Now Esther, do not admonish him too harshly, this is also his first child, and if it gives him comfort to attend you then let him be.” Lady Denham said. 

Esther eye rolled in Charlottes direction and she smiled back to her. Charlottes mother had 11 children so Charlotte had seen all manners of pregnancy, but there is none more nerve wracking than the first she thought. 

“You look lovely Charlotte, blue seems to be your colour,” complimented Esther. 

“Thank you, I was unsure as to how to dress for this evening, but it is somewhat of a celebration is it not? I know that Georgiana is so very happy,” Charlotte replied. 

“Yes, well her investment is more welcome than Mrs Campion’s I can assure you. That woman has one prize in mind and it is not this town,” Lady Denham said as she settled herself. 

The women chatted amongst themselves until Lord Babington came back to tell them that their guests were arriving. Georgiana, The Parkers and Mrs Campion walked into the library and Esther and Babington stepped forward to welcome them. Charlotte stood behind Lady Denham and greeted everyone with a smile. 

“Well now that you are all here, let’s go through to the dining room, our cook does not like to be kept waiting,” Lady Denham said as she led everyone out of the library. Georgiana locked arms with Charlotte. 

“Charlotte, I am so excited! I shall have a voice for the first time, and if she thinks I will be a silent investor then I am afraid Lady D is in for a shock,” she giggled as they followed everyone in. 

Sidney escorted Eliza into the dining room and they looked for their places. Sidney was startled slightly when he saw he was to be seated next to Charlotte, with Eliza sitting on the right-hand side of Lady Denham, and Georgiana directly opposite on the left. Interesting, he thought. Charlotte came to stand next to him, she held her breath, even the smell of him sent goose bumps over her skin. They all sat down and waited for the first course to be served. Sidney found himself smiling and turned to speak to Charlotte. 

“Do you remember the first time we sat at this table? You were so angry with me that you flatly refused to speak to me, in fact you instructed me not to ask you any questions.” Sidney laughed. 

“Yes, I remember. I think I said that I did not wish to court a third tongue lashing and I proceeded to speak with Mr Crowe.” Charlotte smiled at him. 

“I deserved it and much more. How things have changed,” Sidney said. 

Whilst waiting for their dinner to be served Charlotte observed Esther nod to Lord Babington, who rose to his feet and asked for everyone’s attention. 

“I know that we are here to celebrate Miss Lambe and her investment into the town but Esther and I would like to add to that celebration. Esther is expecting our first child and there is no other man in the world happier than I,” Lord Babington happily declared. 

The table broke out into a round of applause and then congratulations from every person at the table came their way. Lady Denham looked at Esther with a proud look on her face, Esther smiled at everyone’s gracious good wishes. The first two courses were served and the talk around the table was of Esther and Babington’s plans for the future. Then Lady Denham decided to make her announcement. 

“Tonight has become a wonderful celebration, and I would like to welcome Miss Lambe as an official investor and resident of Sanditon. Whilst Mrs Campion did offer her services I think we can all agree that the best solution has been found. I maintain that an investor in this town should be one that will be here to live within it, not escaping back to London, yet we are grateful for your offer,” she announced. 

Sidney took a drink and then coughed slightly at the forthright statement from Lady Denham, and he looked towards Eliza who was trying her best to smile through the anger Sidney knew she was feeling. As for Georgiana she smiled and bowed her head gracefully, all the while not taking her eyes off Eliza, Sidney could not help but laugh. Charlotte raised her glass and joined in the congratulations and as she put her glass back down their hands met. A shock ran through both of them. This was torture. Charlotte looked around to see if anyone saw the brief interaction and she saw Esther looking back at her, with a slight smile. 

After dinner the party returned to the library and Charlotte kept distance between Sidney and her, it was for the best she thought. Sidney stood with Babington and Tom although he did not hear a word they were saying, he was staring at Charlotte. This was becoming harder and harder, he wanted to walk over and throw his arms around her. He had to find a way out of this mess for both their sakes. 

Esther observed Mrs Campion from the moment they arrived for dinner. Something was different, she seemed to be rattled, Esther thought she would be happy that she would have no to ties to the town, that she could now drag Parker back to London. 

No, this was different. Esther followed her gaze to see that she was indeed staring at Charlotte. Esther smiled, this was the perfect time for the last part of her plan. 

“Mrs Campion, are you enjoying yourself this evening?” Esther asked. 

“Yes, thank you Lady Babington, although I am somewhat looking forward to returning to London, we have many things to arrange as you can imagine.” Mrs Campion smiled sweetly at Esther.

“Ah your upcoming wedding. I thought I found you distracted somewhat this evening, I thought I observed, though obviously incorrectly that Miss Heywood was the cause of your distraction.” 

“I’m not sure what you mean, Lady Babington, why would Miss Heywood affect me?” Eliza asked, annoyed. 

“Well, I’m sure that if it was my fiancé who was staring at another woman the entire evening, I would surely be very distracted.”

“How dare you…” Esther cut her off with a wave of her hand and stepped in closely so that only Mrs Campion could hear her words. 

“Now, Now, Mrs Campion you see it is just that I have known people like you all my life, you use money and your version of love to manipulate and bend people to your will. I am surprised Mrs Campion, a woman such as yourself would be happy to spend the rest of your life knowing your husband is in love with someone else.”   
Eliza was enraged. “I have known Sidney all my life, I know him better than anyone.”  
“Ahh, then you know the last time his heart was broken he ran off to sea. I’m quite unsure as to what he is capable of doing now, but you don’t have to worry, Lady Susan and I will be sure to quell any rumours of your husband’s constant presence in Sanditon and not in London. Or perhaps he will depart for the sea again. Now you must excuse me, I can see Georgiana and Lady Denham entering into a debate of some sort,” Esther said as she excused herself.   
Esther walked away unsure if her words had any effect or whether they made Mrs Campions resolve to hold onto Sidney stronger, but she had done what she could. Sanditon was safe, the final piece of the puzzle unfortunately lay with Mrs Campion and this would be a fight to the bitter end. 

Eliza was furious, she walked over to Sidney and demanded to go home. Sidney still distracted, at first did not hear her comment, she grabbed his arm.   
“Are you even listening to me Sidney, I said I want to go..now.” 

Sidney was unsure what had happened but Eliza looked fit to burst, he did not want to risk an argument in full view of the room. He spoke with Babington and Tom and took one more look at Charlotte and with a smile and nod of his head he left the room and Sanditon House. The carriage ride home was silent, he was so wrapped up in Charlotte that he had failed to notice Eliza all evening, something he knew he would pay for. Once they arrived at Trafalgar House and stepped inside, he turned to Eliza, furious that she had made him leave.

“What is wrong with you? I have had enough of your demands. That was a celebration for people I care about and I expect you to play your part as you expect me to play mine in London, do you understand.” Sidney said, trying to keep his voice as low as possible. 

“Wrong with me, how dare you? Esther has the cheek to threaten me with social ruin all because you cannot keep your eyes off that little farm girl. I admit that I have now realised your attachment to her is a little bit more than I originally thought, but if you think for one moment I will return to London alone and my engagement no more so that you can run off with that nobody you are very mistaken. I will not have people gossip about me. You came to me, and now that you do not need my money anymore you think you can just toss me aside. I will not have it. I expect you to keep your side of the bargain otherwise I will ruin you and not just you, I will ruin your precious Charlotte’s reputation, do YOU understand? She said venomously. 

He had warned her once before to not invoke Charlottes name as a way to hurt him, now she had threatened her reputation, Sidney felt an anger rise in him that he had never felt before, and even he was shocked at the pitch of his voice he was sure the rest of the street heard him as well.

“THAT’S ENOUGH!!!!! I did come to you, for a loan, an investment, you knew I had no other choice and you attached certain other conditions. I did what I had to do for my family, and in doing that I broke Charlottes heart, I behaved as you did all those years ago and I can hardly live with myself, I do not know how you lived with yourself back then. And now you stand there threatening to ruin an innocent women’s reputation like a spoiled child. Charlotte has doing nothing wrong, do you want to know something, I went to her the day she left, I felt sick at the thought of her leaving, I needed to say goodbye. I told her, I told her that you were not the one I loved and do you know what she said, she told me not to speak like that, that you loved me and I must try to make you happy. She thought of you, your reputation, your happiness. You were right Eliza when you said you are still the same girl, you are still that spoiled, entitled young girl who ran off with a rich man. Even now, you still will not let me go, then so be it I will pay for my mistake in going to you for help, but if you ever threaten Charlotte Heywood again, I promise you that when I am finished the reputation of our so called marriage will be dragged through so much mud you will not be able to set foot in London Society ever again.” And with that Sidney stormed off to the parlour, he needed a drink.   
“Sidney, ….Sidney….I do not feel quite right……Sidddd”

Sidney turned around just in time to watch Eliza fall to the ground.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is wrong with Eliza? What is her next demands? 
> 
> Is there any chance of a HEA?

Chapter 19

Sidney shouted for help as he went to Eliza’s side, he told the maid to go immediately to fetch Dr Fuchs. 

“Eliza, can you hear me?” he shook her slightly.

Her eyes flicked slightly before she opened them. 

“Sidney, what happened?” she said. 

“Shh, I need to get you upstairs and the maid has gone for Dr Fuchs,” he scooped her up into his arms and carried her to her room. 

He lay her gently on the bed, she looked very pale, and seemed to be sweating slightly. He heard the door open and Dr Fuchs call his name. 

“We are upstairs Doctor, please come up.”

“What do we have here Mr Parker, what happened?” Dr Fuchs said as he moved Sidney out of his way. 

“She said she felt unwell, and then she proceeded to faint. She woke up and I brought her straight upstairs. Is she ok Doctor? he asked worriedly. No matter what their circumstances were, he did not wish her ill health. 

Dr Fuchs did not answer him at first, he was pre-occupied with examining Eliza, who still was not speaking. 

“She has a temperature it seems, and her breathing is slightly laboured. She will need plenty of rest and ensure that she is kept hydrated. I will check on her in the morning. Please fetch me if her symptoms become worse. I have no answers yet Mr Parker, it could be a very bad cold or an infection. Please ensure someone stays with her to watch her fever,” Dr Fuchs said. 

“Yes, Doctor, Myself and Mary will watch over her, the family should be home soon, and thank you for coming so quickly,” Sidney said and the doctor left the room. 

“I want to go home, please take me back to my home,” Eliza said weakly. 

“Shh, you heard Dr Fuchs, you need to rest.” Sidney instructed the maid to fetch fresh water and then to wait for Mr and Mrs Parker to come home, she was to instruct Mrs Parker to come up immediately. 

Tom and Mary arrived home with Georgiana a short while later and they all came immediately upstairs. 

“Sidney, what happened, have you sent for Dr Fuchs?” asked Mary concerned. 

“She fainted downstairs, Dr Fuchs said she has a temperature but he is unsure of the cause at the moment. Mary, I need to ask if you could undress her and make her more comfortable. I will stay with her but as she is not my wife I do not feel that I should see her in that way.” Sidney said. 

“Of course, Nellie and I will see to her. Georgiana, I will need your help also. Tom, take Sidney downstairs and get him a drink.” They left the room and walked silently down the stairs. Mary closed the door and instructed Georgiana to look amongst Eliza’s clothes for her nightwear and asked Nellie the maid to help her with Eliza. 

“Eliza, it’s Mary, I need you try and sit up so that we can get you undressed.” Eliza nodded her head and held out her arms. 

Eliza felt so weak and tired, she put up no fight when Mary said she was going to help her undress. She just wanted to sleep. 

Downstairs, Tom and Sidney sat together. Tom had asked him what had happened, and he told him that they had argued and then she fell to the floor. 

“The whole thing is a mess Tom, I was so angry at her. I shouted at her. I lost my temper. If I had known she was unwell…” Sidney said with his head in his hands. 

“It is not your fault Sidney, she has a fever, that cannot be brought on by an argument, you know this,” Tom said trying to ease his brothers worry. 

Mary and Georgiana entered the room and informed Sidney that Eliza was settled into bed and sleeping if he wanted to go and sit with her. He thanked Mary and left the room. As he entered Eliza’s bedroom, he saw her lying in the bed, her face was flushed with the fever. He sat in the chair and watched her closely. He would get no sleep tonight and he was not sure whether he deserved it. 

The next morning, Eliza woke to the sound of Dr Fuch!s entering her room. 

“Good Morning Frau Campion. How do you feel this morning? Your fever seems to have settled, although you still look pale. I recommend plenty of rest and some herb tea,” he instructed. 

“Thank you Dr Fuchs, but I would like to go home to London, I have my own physician and wish to be within my own house.” 

“Frau Campion, I would not recommend that you travel. It would be best if you stayed here a while longer.” Dr Fuchs tried to insist. 

“Again, I thank you for your concern but I am quite determined, I am sure my health will restore once I am amongst my own things and in my own house.” Eliza would not be deterred from her plan. 

Dr Fuchs bowed and went downstairs to relay Eliza’s wishes to the Parker’s. 

“She cannot be serious, she is much too ill to travel. I will go and talk some sense into her” Sidney said and stormed from the room. 

He knocked and went in to Eliza’s room, she was resting against her pillows. 

“Eliza, Dr Fuchs informed me that you intend to return to London, I do not think that is wise, you are far too ill to endure such a journey,” he said. 

“I am going home Sidney, I cannot rest in this house or stay in this town a moment longer. I have sent Nellie with a letter to send to my house to have them prepare everything. I am grateful to Mary for her help and I am told that Georgiana was also here, please extend my thanks. I would be grateful if you could join me on my journey. I am sure that Lady Denham would spare you now and you can conduct whatever business you have from your house in London. I have arranged for the carriage to be sent here after lunch, please make sure you are ready to leave as you cannot expect me to make this journey alone.” She turned her head; the conversation was over. 

Sidney left the room. This was it, he had no choice but to accompany her back to London. He leaned against the wall, his heart beating fast. She was sick, and any decent gentleman would want to do his duty and ensure her wellbeing, but the thought of this being the last time he could possibly see Charlotte filled him with absolute dread. He breathed deeply and headed downstairs to inform his family. 

When Sidney came downstairs he was surprised to see Georgiana sitting with Mary and Tom.

“Good morning Georgiana, I did not thank you properly for your assistance last night. I am glad you are here as I have some news. Eliza has decided that she would like to return to London, I have tried to dissuade her but she has already put her plans in motion. I cannot in good faith allow her to return alone so I must go also.” 

The room fell silent, everyone knew that the last thing Sidney wanted to do was leave Sanditon. 

“Well, we knew this day would come and if she is unwell you can hardly refuse to go,” Georgiana said sadly. 

“Thank you for understanding. Mary I would like Georgiana to live here until she can purchase a home of her own. She does not need to be governed by Mrs Griffiths any longer, if you have no objections?” Sidney asked. 

“Of course not, I would have suggested this myself. Sidney, I am sorry you are leaving, we promise to keep an eye on everything here and everyone,” Mary said trying to reassure him. 

“Thank you. Georgiana if you can wait a moment I shall accompany you back and speak with Mrs Griffiths and then I need to visit Lady Denham.” And with that he left the room. 

Sidney and Georgiana walked to Mrs Griffiths and Sidney informed her of the plans to move Georgiana across to Trafalgar House, explaining that if he was not here he would rather her be with family. Georgiana was grateful for it, and said she would be there to see him off. Sidney left and decided to take a walk to Sanditon House, he knew Lady Denham would not be happy at him leaving but there was nothing that he could do, and he was sure her and Georgiana would keep Tom in check. Then there was the conversation that he dreaded having. Saying goodbye to Charlotte was never easy. He had resigned himself the first time to never seeing her again and then she returned. He felt this time with her had been a gift no matter how hard it had been, it was the most wonderful gift and all he would have now would be more memories. 

He arrived at Sanditon House to a surprised Babington. 

“Good Morning old chap, this is early for you! I say, you look rather concerned, is everything alright? 

Sidney explained the events that had happened in the last few hours, Babington stood there, shocked. 

“My god, is there anything we can do? I will fetch Esther and Lady Denham straight away, please go into the small parlour, there is a fire lit,” and off Babington went. 

Sidney stood looking out of the window when someone entered the room. 

“Mr Parker! I apologise, I did not know anyone was in here. Does Lord Babington know that you are here? Shall I fetch him?” Charlotte asked. 

“Good morning Miss Heywood. Yes he has gone to fetch Esther and Lady Denham, I have some news.” Sidney struggled to say the words but he was glad they were alone. 

He walked over to her, he looked into those eyes that seemed to swallow him whole. He smiled at her savouring every moment that he had left with her. Charlotte looked back at him, she began to worry, he was staring at her. 

“Are you quite well? Is something the matter?” She asked nervously. 

“Mrs Campion is unwell, and she has decided to return to London. As things stand I have no choice but to accompany her, and I do not know when I will return,” Sidney said still trying to memorise every line of her face. 

Charlotte stood there not knowing what to say. She always knew this day would come, and she had no right to be upset but it took all she had to hold in the tears. They had stolen their last few moments together, and she was grateful for them however inappropriate that may be, and now she faced the thing she had being trying to forget. He was leaving, and this could be the last time she ever saw him again. 

“I am sorry that Mrs Campion is unwell and I wish her a speedy recovery. I wish you both well Mr Parker. I presume that by the time you return I will have departed once more for home. I should go and see where Lady Denham is.” She turned to leave the room.

“These past weeks have been the best of my life, and I know that you do not wish me to speak in such a way but I am not sure if we shall see each other again, and if we do then my circumstances will be much different. Charlotte, I…I...” Sidney knew that if he finished that sentence he would not be able to leave the room. 

Without turning around, Charlotte answered him. 

“Please do not finish what you were about to say. It is not in our power to say the things that we want to, but know that you are not alone in those feelings but revealing them now will do nothing other than bring each other pain. We have had no right to have the precious moments we have been given and I will be forever grateful that we had them. Let us part as friends, I wish Mrs Campion a speedy recovery. Good day Mr Parker.” Without turning around Charlotte left the room. 

Sidney stood there, using every piece of strength in his body not to follow her out the door. She was right as she always was. Then he realised, in the midst of everything before him, London, Sanditon, none of them were home, she was.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter today, people leaving, some truths being spoken.......

Chapter 20 

Sidney stood there as Charlotte left the room, she was right, telling each other exactly how they felt would bring them nothing but pain, but he so desperately wanted to hear those words from her. He hated himself for doing this to her. Lost in his thoughts, he did not realise that Lady Denham had entered the room and stood there staring at him for a moment. 

“Mr Parker, it’s a little early for a social call is it not? I believe then that it must not be good news that brings you here so early,” she said as she made her way to the large chair. 

“No Lady Denham, I am here to tell you that I must leave and go to London. For how long I am unsure, Mrs Campion has taken ill and she wishes to return to her home. I cannot in good conscience let her undertake that journey alone. Mr Stringer is up to date on all the matters regarding the refurbishment and what can be finished before the winter sets in. I am sure that Georgiana and Miss Heywood will keep you abreast of all the administration. I am sorry for this, and I will return when I can. I have instructed Georgiana to keep me informed with weekly letters,” Sidney said.

“I see, and I gather you have told Miss Heywood? Which would explain her distress as she passed me on the way,” Lady Denham said directly. 

“Yes, I am at fault for that and many other things Lady Denham.” 

“Self-pity is neither constructive nor attractive Mr Parker therefore it would be better not to practice it. I am an old woman but I am not blind, the connection between yourself and Miss Heywood is obvious for everyone to see no matter how much you try to hide it, both of you. I would place a wager that had your brother not been so stupid, you and Miss Heywood would be in a different position than you are now,” said Lady Denham, not mincing her words. 

“Erm, well, yes maybe things would have been different and if we are being honest Lady Denham, I decided to stay and help this town not because of my brother but to prove to her that I am the man she thinks I am. If I had not been so stubborn and gone to Georgiana in the first place we would not be in this position, but I did not and now I have to live with the consequences and so does she. I will not forgive myself for that.” 

“Thank you for being so honest Mr Parker. I am sorry to see you go, you have proved that you are at least not as stupid as your brother. Miss Heywood is a capable young woman; I would not worry too much.” she smiled as she said this. 

Sidney bowed and left the room, and after a quick goodbye with Babington he left Sanditon House. He took one last walk along their cliffside and went back to Trafalgar House. 

Mary was in Eliza’s room helping to organise her things, when she decided to question her on her reasons for leaving. 

“Are you sure it is wise for you to be leaving Mrs Campion? You still seem flushed and very pale. Surely our hospitality has not been so bad it would make you leave?” she asked honestly. 

“No Mary, you have been very generous in having me to stay, but I would feel better in my own house, the journey is not so far and I will have Sidney with me.” 

“Is that your true wish? To have Sidney far from his family? I hope that you will not disappear so much into London society that we shall not see him again.” Mary asked honestly as she had feeling that this was a plan set in motion. 

“Of course not, I know how dear your children are to Sidney and I will promise that we will visit at least once a year. The summer perhaps when the weather is more favourable, on our way to join our friends in Brighton.” Eliza smiled sweetly, annoyed at Mary’s impertinence.

“Well, I must say that is of comfort, if you will excuse me I must ensure Sidney’s things are ready.” Mary said dropping Eliza’s dress on to the bed and walking out of the room.

Mary had never been so annoyed. She did not doubt that Eliza felt unwell but she was certain that this illness played into her hands of removing Sidney from Sanditon, his family and more importantly Charlotte. She then heard Sidney come into the house so she proceeded downstairs. 

“Sidney, may I speak with you in private?” Mary said as she walked towards the parlour, giving Sidney no time to answer. She turned and spoke her mind. 

“Sidney, I am not doubting Mrs Campion’s ill health, however I do think this is to her benefit to remove you from your home and family. Please be careful for I am sure she means to keep you there forever. I know what you did, you did to help Tom and prevent my family falling into ruin and for that I will be forever grateful, but I must speak my mind. If you can possibly find a way out of this marriage then do so for your own sake. It will not be a happy marriage, nor an equal one I dare say,” she said honestly. 

“Mary, believe me when I say I have tried. I have told her honestly where my heart lies and it seems to make no difference. She thinks that when we return to London and her life I will suddenly see the light. If I leave her, it will be a scandal and not just for her but for anyone in association with me and I will not do that. Tom is not the only one to blame here; my foolish pride is also. A part of me hopes that when we are in London she will see how disinterested I am, although I am not hopeful,” he said. 

At that moment they heard Eliza instructing the staff with regards to the luggage, and as they opened the front door there was Georgiana. She had come to say to goodbye to Sidney and to deliver some news to him that shocked everyone. Eliza followed her into the room. 

“Sidney, Mary, Mrs Campion. I am here to wish you well on your journey and to inform you that I will be arriving at Bedford Place tomorrow myself, I have arranged this with Tom. I need some new clothes for the winter and what better time. Therefore, Sidney will not be alone in that big house, I mean, he cannot stay with Mrs Campion before their wedding. Have a safe journey Sidney, I will see you soon,” Georgiana said completely ignoring the look on Eliza’s face. She nodded at Mary and left. 

Mary smiled, it seems everyone has their own agenda and it seems that Georgiana knew where she was not wanted so she was going to place herself in that exact place. She must speak with Tom, it was not like him to engage in travel arrangements with anyone and he was also not here to see Sidney off which was strange. Eliza stood there smiling sweetly, Sidney knew she was enraged at the thought of Georgiana joining them. Perhaps Georgiana’s constant presence would be enough to make her rethink her hold on him, otherwise he was unsure what else he could do. What a mistake he had made because of his pride. He made up his mind there and then, that whatever scheme Georgiana had in her mind, he was to be her accomplice, and that made him happy. 

Sidney and Eliza said goodbye to Mary and the children who was were very unhappy that their Uncle was leaving. Sidney noticed that Tom was nowhere to be found and for some reason he was sad about that. They left Trafalgar House and started their journey to London, which he realised would probably be the longest journey he had ever taken. 

As the carriage left Trafalgar House, Charlotte stood at the top of the street and watched it leave. He was gone and she was unsure as to when she would see him again. Would he be married? This was for the best she thought, she could now concentrate on her work and not worry about dealing with her feelings for Sidney. She resolved there and then to enjoy her time in Sanditon with her friends and her new work, and her first visit of the day was to go and see Georgiana and invite her to dine at Sanditon House tonight.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is moving about, people coming and going, mysterious notes, is Eliza really sick??? 
> 
> Thanks to my awesome friend Mia to listening to my crazy ideas and proof reading....

Charlotte went to visit Georgiana and found her packing. 

“May I ask where you are off to in such a hurry? I had come to ask you to dine with us tonight,” Charlotte said. 

“That would be lovely thank you. I am away to London tomorrow, I am unsure how long I will be gone for but I cannot possibly leave Sidney alone with that harpy, and my presence irritates her, that therefore brings me joy,” Georgiana said happily. 

Charlotte laughed and shook her head. She would miss Georgiana but there was Mary, Esther and all the work still to be done. Charlotte left Georgina and promised to see her at dinner. She walked over to Trafalgar House and on the way, she met Mr Stringer. They discussed Sidney leaving but Charlotte did not say much, she changed the subject to the work still outstanding and the work that had started at Denham Place. After they departed Charlotte finally made it to Trafalgar House, and as she walked inside she thought how empty the place suddenly felt, she expected to see him at the desk. Mary entered the room and gave Charlotte a hug. 

“Please sit, I have asked Nellie to bring us some tea. How is everything at Sanditon House, is Lady Babington keeping well?” Mary asked trying to avoid the elephant in the room.   
“Yes, she is starting to feel much better. I am unsure whether they will return to London for the birth, I am sure Lady Denham would want them to stay. Georgiana tells me she is going to London herself tomorrow,” said Charlotte. 

“Yes, I believe Sidney will be grateful of the company, he does not mix well with Mrs Campion’s friends. Charlotte, may I be forward and ask you how you are dealing with all of this? It cannot be easy for you to see them together. The whole situation is very unfair,” said Mary. 

“Yes, and I will not lie at times it is hard to see and speak with Sidney, but this is our fate and we must deal with it the best that we can. I wish him well. I have my time here in Sanditon to keep me busy and I will enjoy that for as long as Lady Denham wishes me to stay,” Charlotte replied. 

Mary smiled and was amazed at Charlotte’s resolve. She seemed on the surface at least to handle the situation better than Sidney, yet she hoped that this has not made Charlottes heart cold as it had Sidney’s all those years ago. 

They chatted for a while longer and Charlotte promised to visit again tomorrow. As she left Tom Parker entered the house, he greeted Charlotte and then hurried to the office. Charlotte completed her errands and posted a letter to her parents and sister Alison. She loved her walk back to Sanditon House, it was peaceful and quiet. Lost in her thoughts, she thought about her future. Was she destined to stay in Sanditon or return to Willingden? It was only a few weeks ago that she thought her life to be headed in a different direction, although it had been hard; especially being so close to Sidney but she decided that no longer was she going to sit around in mourning of a love that was not hers. Whatever their feelings, fate had been decided and they were not at liberty to change it. She did not want to spend her life questioning what might have been. Life had already given her much to be thankful for, she had a loving family and friends, her work for Lady Denham and the refurbishment gave her a purpose, a sense of achievement and usefulness. Not everyone is destined for the big love that encompasses their life, hers was a love that had been lost and she felt that this was perfectly fine, however broken she had been, she would survive. 

In Trafalgar House a very quiet Tom Parker sat at his desk, missing his younger brother. Mary entered the room. 

“May I ask why you were not here to see your brother off to London Tom?” queried Mary. 

“I could not bear to see him leave Mary, not with Eliza, when it is my fault and mine alone that we are in this mess. I have not the bravery to look him in the eye and wish him well when it is my stupidity and blind ambition that put this entire family at risk. I am a coward Mary, plain and simple,” Tom confessed. 

“Yes Tom, you put your ambition before your sense and family, but it is done. You can only learn from this and move on. Be here for Sidney when he needs you, I have a feeling being married to Eliza Campion he may need your comfort more than you think!” Mary started to laugh as she said this. 

Tom rose to meet Mary and put his arms around his wife. It had been a long time since they had embraced one another. It was a long road to prove to everyone that he had learned his lesson but he was resolved to do so. Firstly, he would write to Sidney and ask him what he can do in his absence. He would also speak with Georgiana and ask her what her ideas are to generate business into the town. He wanted to prove to those around him that he could be trusted once more. 

That evening, whilst Charlotte was upstairs changing, Georgiana arrived early to speak with Lady Babington. 

“Well, some of the plan worked at least, she is gone and no longer an investor but she still has her talons into Sidney, surely she knows that he does not care a jot for her and yet she continues her charade of a happy union. He looks like he is being sent to the gallows not a man in love, with her at least” she said to Esther. 

“Yes, I agree. I had thought that the words I had with her would have had some effect but I see that she really is quite determined. I have one more ace to play. I have a letter for you to take to London, and once you are in London ensure that one of the servants in Bedford Place takes this to the address on the front. Await instruction for a visit, this may be our last hope,” Esther said sadly. They both exited the library and joined the rest of the house for dinner. 

Sidney and Eliza arrived in London late into the night. Sidney ensured that Eliza was settled and instructed the servants to ensure they fetched the doctor in the morning to check their mistress over. He then left and made his way to Bedford Place. Once settled he wrote a note to Arthur and Diana to let them know of his presence in town and to invite them for dinner with himself and Georgiana later that week. He was looking forward to Georgiana’s visit and would be glad of the company. The journey back to London had been quiet as Eliza had slept most of the journey. He knew that he would not have much sleep himself, he felt restless. He fixed himself a drink, grabbed a book and settled in his seat. It was going to be a long night. 

Georgiana woke early the next morning, she was excited to leave for London. She had breakfast, went across to say goodbye to Mary and then boarded the coach for London. Sidney was to meet her at her destination, and she was hoping to see Arthur whilst she was in London also. The carriage ride was very different from the last one she had experienced, life had changed so very much since then. She very rarely allowed herself to think of Otis, it still hurt. She loved him so very much and she hoped that wherever he was, he was doing well. After a while she reached London and as promised Sidney was there to meet her. He instructed his carriage driver to take her luggage back to the house as he wanted to walk back to Bedford Place, it had been a long time since they had walked the streets together. 

“I hope your journey was agreeable, it is nice to have you here Georgiana although one of your reasons is to irritate Eliza,” Sidney said smiling. 

“That is an added pleasure if I do, but it is not my sole purpose in coming here. I want to see Arthur, to purchase some new clothes, and I did not like the thought of you rattling away in that house thinking about Charlotte,” she said looking directly at him. 

“Am I that obvious? Well I have sent a note to Arthur and Diana and asked them to dine with us tomorrow. I would like to see them also. Then I am sure you will want to make appointments with your dressmaker, you can do this whilst I am out this afternoon. Do you have anything else you need to do?” he asked. 

“Yes, Esther has asked me to see a friend of hers on a private matter but I will need to wait for a reply to the note that was sent. Will you be at her house all evening?” 

“I hope not, I do need to make sure that she is well, but as this is your first evening I will make my excuses and leave. Thank you, Georgiana. For everything.” Sidney smiled at her. 

They both walked all the way back to Bedford Place, Georgiana explained the plans she had in mind, she even gave Tom some credit for not interfering. Sidney did not realise exactly how much he enjoyed her company until now. There had been so much anger and distrust at the start that was mostly down to him, but they had made such progress with each other and now it seems she was willing to take Eliza on. 

Once Georgiana settled herself into her room, Sidney left to go to Eliza’s house, and Georgiana had the note that Esther had given her sent to its recipient and she was eagerly awaiting the reply. 

Sidney made his way over to Eliza’s house and when he arrived, Eliza was in her parlour waiting for him. She still looked unwell, her face was pale and she seemed very tired when she spoke. 

“Hello Sidney, did Georgiana arrive safely?” she asked. 

“Yes, she did thank you, how are you feeling?” he asked. 

“The fever seems to have completely gone but I still feel very tired, the physician is due shortly. I am hoping that you will stay until then.”

Sidney nodded in head in agreement and proceeded to take a seat opposite her. They spoke a little regarding London and plans that Eliza had for when she was feeling better. She broached the subject of their upcoming wedding - Sidney knew that it was a subject that could not be avoided forever, but the thought of it made him sick to his stomach.   
“I think that it may be a good idea to move the wedding forward now that we are back in London,” she said, studying the reaction on his face. 

“We are in no rush, and I thought that you wanted to have a large wedding in the Spring? Surely you need to concentrate on getting better?” Sidney replied using every excuse he could muster. 

“I think that now we no longer have the responsibility of Sanditon hanging over us we should move on, and begin our lives as a married couple,” Eliza said, annoyed at the reluctance that Sidney seemed to be showing. 

“No” he answered before he could stop himself. He was happy to ensure that she felt well again but there was a real panic in him, she was right, he may have to oversee the project but he could do that from here. 

“Excuse me? Did you just say no? Do you expect me to let this engagement drag on?” shocked at the response she was receiving. 

Just as Sidney was about to answer the butler came in and announced that the doctor had arrived. Sidney left the room to greet him and to show him where Eliza was situated. He waited outside the parlour whilst Eliza was examined. This gave him time to think about what he had just said. In their arguments he had told her explicitly that he did not love her anymore but that did not seem to matter to her, she seemed to think that being back in London would sway his mind, but since arriving here all he had wanted to do was to turn around and go straight back to Sanditon, to his family, his friends and Charlotte. He was going to try once more to convince Eliza that this would be an unhappy marriage. After a time, the doctor came out and said that Eliza was to have rest and he would be back in a few days but did not say anymore than that. When he went into the parlour Eliza was staring into the fire, she looked different. 

“Eliza, are you alright?” he asked. 

“I am fine, I need some rest that is all. If you don’t mind Sidney I would like to retire for the rest of the day. I am sure that Georgiana needs your company. I will see you tomorrow” and with that she rang for her maid to help her to her room. 

Georgiana was organising her diary for her time in London when Sidney returned home. 

“I did not expect you so soon, do not tell me that she was happy for you to leave her and spend time with me?” Georgiana asked smiling. 

“She still feels unwell and the doctor said that she needs rest, therefore I am all yours for the rest of the day. Shall we go for walk? A museum perhaps? He asked. 

“Well, I actually would like to discuss some ideas about Sanditon, I think that we should expand the school, and organise events for the holidays, family events such as a family cricket event. We should also speak more with Dr Fuchs about his treatments despite Lady Denham’s objections and there is so much more” Georgiana spoke so excitedly and she noticed that Sidney was smiling at her. 

“What may I ask are you so happy about?” She asked. 

“I never thought I would ever see you happy here, and listening you speak so passionately brings me joy, am I not allowed to have any?” he asked pretending to be hurt. 

Georgiana rolled her eyes and they spent the rest of the afternoon and evening after dinner contemplating ideas for the town. During this spirited conversation the maid entered the room with a message for Georgiana. She read the message and smiled. 

“It seems I am busy tomorrow so you will have to fend for yourself, but I shall be back in time for dinner with Arthur and Diana. Now let’s get back to work” she ordered.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't have wrote this Chapter without the help of my friend Mia, she is my sounding board, my proof reader no matter the time of night, thank you so much, this chapter is for you!!!!
> 
> I hope you all like it.......

Charlotte awoke that morning, and wandered over to her window. She looked out to see Mr Stringer and Fred on their way to Denham Place, through Sanditon Park. Esther had not really spoken of the plans that she had for the property, she did not mention it at all to her. Charlotte knew that Lady Denham had purchased the property from Edward so that he could never return and in turn gifted it to Esther to do as she pleased with it. 

As she sat in the chair, looking out into the cold morning her mind drifted to Sidney, she hated herself for thinking about him. She tried to keep her mind occupied most of the time but it was in these unguarded moments that she thought of him. She thought of the night in London when they danced together. She had never felt so close to a person before, he had held her so gently yet firmly. He guided her around the floor and made her feel that she was the only woman in the room when he said “I don’t want to dance with them”. That dance will always hold a special place in her memory, it was their own special moment before a series of events that fate had in store for them. 

In another bedroom, another person was dreaming of the same dance. 

He held her tightly. They were moving to the music but it seemed so far away, it was just the two of them. He looked into her eyes and pulled her close, their bodies pressed against one another. There was no one else in the room but them. He bent his head, his eyes never leaving her mouth, the slight whisper of his name was on her lips, and he pressed his lips to hers…Sidney Parker woke with a start, breathing heavily he fell back on to his pillow. At first he could not sleep at all, now sleep found him easily and she was in every part of his dreams. He would give anything to have her lying next to him, for them to be together, married with their own family. He could blame fate or Tom but the truth is he was in part to blame himself. His stubbornness in not wanting to involve Georgiana or ask Babington, had led him to his impending fate and now all he had were the dreams that haunted his sleep. 

Charlotte decided she definitely did not want to spend anymore time moping about things she could not change so she got dressed and joined everyone for breakfast. There was already a discussion going on when she arrived in the dining room.

“Good morning Charlotte, I have some errands for you today when you have finished and then I thought we could go for a stroll on the beach. It has been an age since I have smelt the sea air, so eat up and be ready for the day,” Lady Denham ordered. 

Esther smiled at Charlotte, and she noticed Esther seemed to be looking at lot less sickly and had a slight radiance to her. Her and Babington seemed to be so happy, they had their troubles at the start but they were a team now, and Charlotte had never seen a husband prouder than him. They all finished breakfast, and Lady Denham gave Charlotte a list of jobs, such as sending orders to the kitchen, writing letters for her and choosing books that she wanted Charlotte to read to her. After all this was done, she ordered the carriage to take her and Charlotte to the beach. It was a cold but clear day and Esther had warned her Aunt not to overexert herself but as usual she replied she knew herself best. So, off they went, just Charlotte and Lady Denham. 

Sidney dressed and joined Georgiana for breakfast, he noticed that she looked very spirited this morning, and eager to start her day. 

“May I ask where you are going today? I do not like the thought of you wandering London alone,” Sidney said in a serious tone, this was not Sanditon he thought, and her last experience was not the best one. 

“I have a meeting with an acquaintance of Esther’s. Sarah, the maid is coming with me so you don’t have to worry, I shall be back in time for dinner with Arthur and Diana I promise,” she said in a matter-of-fact fashion. 

Sidney was a little unsure due to her unwillingness to offer any more information and a part of him was sure this had something to do with Eliza. He finished his breakfast and went to the office. He wanted to write to Mary and Tom to assure them that things were well here, and they had all arrived safely. He thought briefly about writing to Charlotte. He could say it was to give instructions but the truth was if he started writing it would not be about that town! He was due to visit Eliza this afternoon and he was sure she would broach the marriage subject again, even after he had plainly said no there seemed to be no dissuading her. She seemed too intent on marrying Sidney and he did not know the reason why. He had told her, often in a cruel manner where his heart lay and with whom, yet it was of no use. He could refuse to marry her, but he was gentleman and would not ruin her reputation or soil any union that he would make with Charlotte if he was free. He sighed and set to writing his letters. 

Charlotte and Lady Denham arrived at the beach front, and climbed out of the carriage. Charlotte remembered back to the first time that she met Lady Denham, she had been so strong and full of character but her illness had taken its toll, not mentally but physically, once the footman had helped her out of the carriage, Charlotte offered her arm and she gladly took it. They walked in silence for a while, then Lady Denham spoke on a subject that took Charlotte by surprise. 

“So Charlotte, I suppose you are missing Sidney Parker? That would of course explain your melancholy the past two days but mark my words, his marriage to that Campion woman will not be a happy one, you can take solace in that fact,” she said, unaware of the shocked expression on Charlottes face. 

“Erm, I am not sure what you mean Lady Denham, yes Mr Parker and I are acquaintances, friends even, and I wish him well in his future marriage,” Charlotte said, she was quite taken back. 

“You know exactly what I mean, no need to act coy with me my girl. We have all loved and lost at one point in our youth. I doubt that anyone wishes Eliza Campion well, even her future husband. However, I have to say I have admiration for Parker, it takes a good man to put the family’s honour and reputation before his own happiness. As I told Parker myself, you’re a strong one, you will see your way through this and there is always a place for you here,” she said as she tapped Charlottes arm in an affectionate manner.   
They continued their walk in silence, Charlotte in truth did not know how to respond to the fact that Sidney had spoken to Lady Denham about her. Charlotte smiled, it would be a very unwise and foolish person to ever underestimate Lady Denham, and she was very grateful to her for letting Charlotte know she always had another place she could call home. 

Georgiana left Bedford place for her appointment. They passed through the streets of London until they came to a very fine place on the edge of Hyde Park. The house was large with tall columns at the front. Georgiana knocked on the door and a very stern looking butler answered and showed her and her maid into the foyer where they were greeted by their host.

“Well, you must be the famous Miss Lambe I have heard so much about, how do you do?”

“And you are the famous Lady Susan that Charlotte tells me so much about” Georgiana replied as she curtseyed. 

Lady Susan smiled and instructed her butler to show Sarah to the kitchen and gestured for Georgiana to follow her into her library. 

Georgiana had always been impressed with the library at Sanditon House but this was altogether a much grander room. The ceilings were high with a painted ceiling as if the sky had been transported inside. Books covered every inch of the room from the floor to the ceiling, she stood there, taking in this beautiful room. 

“Please Miss Lambe, take a seat near the fire, it is becoming colder now.” Lady Susan invited her to sit. 

“Call me Georgiana, please, and thank you for seeing me, although Charlotte will be very jealous that she was not here to see you also.” 

“How is Charlotte? She wrote to me to let me know that Lady Babington had invited her back to Sanditon and to inform me that you are now the investor in the town, although that came a little late to stop a certain engagement from happening,” Lady Susan said with a distasteful look on her face. 

“Yes, well not only is Tom Parker possibly the worst business man in the world, Sidney’s stubbornness prevented him from asking me in the first place. However, this change has not prevented Mrs Campion from moving forward with the marriage to Sidney, he has told her repeatedly that he does not love her but still she proceeds. She even used her supposed illness to bring Sidney back to London away from Charlotte. Lady Babington thinks you may be able to help?” Georgiana asked hopefully. 

Lady Susan smiled, Esther had written to her a few weeks ago, asking for any information that she could acquire to help release Sidney from the clutches of the wealthy widow. Eager to lend any assistance that she could, she sent her network of friends to work and the information she found whilst not shocking to her would indeed anger Mr Parker.   
“Georgiana, I have some information and while this might not encourage her to leave Mr Parker, I do believe it may help him plead his case but before I give this to you please note that this is not pleasant reading, and I myself find it reprehensible,” she said as she passed Georgiana the letter and documents that she had been sent. 

Georgiana was quiet for some time, perusing the information she had just been given. Eventually she lowered the documents with shaking hands, “And you can vouch that this information is true?” Georgiana asked, struggling to conceal her anger. 

Lady Susan nodded and they continued to talk a little longer before Georgiana announced that it was time for her leave. She thanked Lady Susan for her help and asked her to not tell Charlotte yet. She called for her maid and her carriage. They made their way back to Bedford Place, and Georgiana went inside to find Sidney about to leave. 

“Georgiana, are you quite well?” he asked noticing the silent fury emanating from her. 

Georgiana without a word passed Sidney the documents and walked towards the stairs, she needed to lie down. She turned to Sidney before he left and said “She is never to be in my company again, do you understand? If you still choose to marry her because of some blind gentlemanly agreement then you and I will no longer be friends, and the moment I am of age I will have nothing to do with you. This is not about you and Charlotte anymore; I am asking you to choose...It’s me or her Sidney.” And with that Georgiana turned and walked up the stairs.

Sidney looked down and scanned the documents, his rage building as he read. Without calling for his coat or hat he tore out of Bedford Place with the words of Georgiana and what he had just read going over in his mind. He stood outside Eliza’s house trying to calm the anger rising in him. He banged on the front door and as the butler opened it he burst through. The butler was speaking to him but he only heard that she was in the parlour and he made his way to her. He thundered into the room to find her sitting there with some of her friends.

“Sidney, please come in...whatever is the matter?” she said noticing his rage. 

He threw the documents at her, not caring about the people in the room to witness it.

“Tell me that this document is not real, that is a fake Eliza,” he said through gritted teeth, barely concealing his rage. 

Eliza looked at the documents and neatly folded them in her hands, she politely asked her friends to wait whilst she spoke with Sidney, and gestured for him to leave the room. He followed her upstairs to her room. 

“Well? Explain yourself!” he demanded as soon as the door was shut, trying to keep his voice level. 

“Explain what Sidney? It’s business, I am quite unsure what the fuss is about” she said.

In that moment Sidney Parker exploded with rage that could be felt throughout the whole of London. 

“FUSS? IS THAT WHAT YOU CALL IT? FUSS! YOUR MONEY COMES FROM THE SLAVE TRADE! YOU MAKE MONEY, YOUR HUSBANDS MONEY BY BUILDING AND OWNING SHIPS THAT TRANSPORT PEOPLE AS SLAVES! HOW THE HELL CAN YOU STAND THERE AND BE SO COLD ABOUT THE BUSINESS OF TRADING PEOPLE?”

Without giving her a chance to answer, he continued:

“You knew my feelings on the matter, my refusal to have anything to do with the sugar trade, you said your husband made his fortune in ships and exporting of trade. You looked me in the eye and failed to mention it was the trade of people. You sat across from my ward, knowing what she has seen and experienced and had the audacity to be annoyed with her.”

Sidney continued…

“You make me sick! Do you know that? Sick that I could have ever loved someone like you. I am glad and I thank you for one thing, for running off all those years ago. I want nothing to do with you do you understand? Nothing! This engagement is over. I do not care for my reputation or yours for that matter, tell people what you like I do not care, but I will never marry you, I would rather be in the poorhouse or debtors prison.” And with that he turned to leave. 

“If you think for one second I will let you go you are mistaken. If you leave me now, not only will I ruin your family name, I will ruin the reputation of that little harlot you are so in love with,” she said with venom. 

Sidney smiled as he answered her…

“I think I can answer that threat for her. Charlotte Heywood would rather risk a ruined reputation amongst the people of this city than have her best friend associated with a slave trader. She would risk her own good name to ensure that Georgiana and I stay as a family. So, do your worst Eliza, nobody cares. Now I am going to go home and, in the morning, I am going to leave this god forsaken city and return to my home.” And with that he left. 

Sidney walked out of Eliza’s house and for the first time in years he felt free. A weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He would ensure that Lady Susan informed people this had nothing to do with Charlotte but as for his own reputation he did not care. 

Eliza stood there, raging. How dare he! How dare that little upstart and her friend destroy her happiness. Well, she thought, they won’t get away with this. She ran out of her room, and towards the stairs.

Sidney arrived at Bedford Place and went immediately to see Georgiana. He told her everything that had happened and promised her she would never see that woman again. He told her over and over that he was sorry, he had no idea what the trade was that her husband dealt in. Georgiana smiled and hugged Sidney, and although she wanted to have her own choice words with Eliza Campion she knew her time would come. Sidney and Georgiana went downstairs to prepare for Arthur and Diana’s arrival. It sometime later when the footman came to Sidney with a note. 

He read the note, his face drained of colour, and he looked directly at Georgiana.

“Eliza is dead…”


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very short chapter to deal with the immediate aftermath, I have read all of your comments so hopefully this will confirm some peoples fears!

Sidney stood there looking at the note, his face was the colour of snow. His hand trembling, he felt like he could not move. Georgiana slowly walked towards him and removed the note from his hand, she read it carefully. 

“Dear Mr Parker, it is with a heavy heart and shock that I write this message to you. It is with regret that I inform you that our mistress Mrs Campion has sadly passed away this afternoon following a fall.”

The letter continued on asking for Sidney to visit the house as soon as possible as the whole house was in uproar and Mrs Campions’ friends were still there wondering what should be done next. Georgiana was shocked, of all the things she never expected to hear such news. She looked at Sidney who had not moved from the spot where he stood. Georgiana guided him to the nearest chair and fixed him a drink, she sent a note with their footman that Sidney would be there soon. She kneeled in front of him and spoke softly. 

“Sidney, I know this has shocked you but you need to go to her house, I will come with you, we need to go, so drink and I will have the carriage brought around.” 

Sidney did not speak but nodded his head in acknowledgment. They both made their way to the carriage and onto Eliza’s home. Sidney still did not speak, Georgiana watched him closely, the shock was all over his face. She knew they must have argued due to the information that he took to her. Georgiana was worried, very worried. 

They arrived at Eliza’s house, the front door was open and there was the physician and some men who looked like they were awaiting instruction, the doctor looked up to see Sidney and walked over to greet him. 

“Mr Parker, I am so very sorry, Mrs Campion it seems took a fall down the stairs” The doctor looked over his shoulder and then gestured for the gentlemen to stand away from the body. 

Sidney walked over to the body lying at the bottom of the stairs, he knelt beside her, her eyes were closed, he bowed his head and laid his hand on her head, he whispered to her and then nodded to the gentleman to cover her once more. The doctor asked Sidney to accompany him into the parlour where Mrs Campions’ friends had gathered with a policeman who had been called by himself. As they walked towards the door Georgiana appeared by his side, she touched his arm to let him know she was there. As they entered, the room turned to look at the three people that entered and then in a flash one of Eliza’s friends walked over to Sidney and slapped him across the face. 

“This is your fault, if you had not treated her the way you did, your angry words, your fighting, she would not have ran after you, this is your fault.” The woman screamed at Sidney. 

Sidney stood there and accepted the woman’s attack and menacing words. The policeman approached Sidney. 

“Mr Parker, I do believe that you and Mrs Campion were engaged, and that today before her tragic fall you had some disagreement. May I ask what this was concerning?” he asked seriously.

“Yes, I had found out some news relating to her business that I was extremely unhappy with, I came into this room, and threw the letter I had at her and then we went to her room and argued some more before I left. The last time I saw her was in her room, I did not see her leave that room.” Sidney’s voice was flat as he answered. 

“I can confirm that Mr Parker did in fact leave this house before Mrs Campion had left her room” came the voice from the corner of the room, Eliza’s butler. 

The policeman looked at Sidney, and then over to Georgiana, he looked her over before speaking to her. 

“And who are you young lady?” he said glaring at her. 

“That is my ward Miss Georgiana Lambe, she was with me at our home in Bedford Place when we received the news. She was not here during the argument.” 

“Hmmm, well I see no reason for anymore questioning at this time, I will however speak with you at another time Mr Parker. Please accept my condolences” he bowed his head and left the room. 

The policeman left and then one by one Eliza’s friends left the house without a word said to Sidney. He knew they blamed him, the gossip mill would spread through London like wild fire. He noticed that the doctor was still present.   
“Dr Thornton, is there something else that you need” Sidney asked. 

“I have left the details of the funeral directors that have taken Mrs Campion. Also Mr Parker, I hope that you know what happened today was an accident and that you should not blame yourself.” he said kindly. 

Sidney nodded and thanked the doctor for his assistance and asked the butler to show him out. Georgiana stood there, quiet the whole time, just watching. He gave some instructions to the staff and said he would return tomorrow, and then took the carriage back to Bedford Place. When they arrived Diana and Arthur were waiting for them. Sidney took one look at Georgiana, and then walked up the stairs without a word to anyone. Georgiana relayed the news to Diana and Arthur. 

“Oh my lord, what awful news. Arthur and I will stay and help with what we can.” Diana said. 

After dinner, Arthur asked the maid to fix Sidney a small plate and with that he took a bottle of Whiskey and 2 glasses upstairs. He knocked on the door, but no answer came, he entered anyway. There was Sidney sitting in front of the small fire, Arthur put the food to one side, his brother would be in no mood to eat and sat in front of him and poured two very large glasses and handed one to Sidney. 

For a while they sat there in silence, until Arthur decided to speak not knowing if this was a good idea or not. 

“I am sorry Sidney” he said quietly. 

“I do not deserve your condolences brother, I deserve absolutely nothing from anyone” 

“Sidney, it was not your fault, and before you say anything Georgiana told us what happened, there was no way that you could have known the events that were to follow. You were defending a member of our family, Eliza made the choice to go after you, it was a tragic accident,” Arthur said kindly. 

Sidney smiled at Arthur, he knew that his brother, who was the kinder and more genteel of the three of them, was trying to help but Sidney could only think of the words that he had said. 

“I was so angry Arthur, and she would never have come after me if I had not told her that I would not marry her. Everything I had felt these last few weeks came bumbling out all at once. If I had just kept my temper, had I not made her go upstairs to talk immediately then she would not have followed me. The truth is, not only was I angry because of her deceit but because I was pleased I had finally found a way out, a way to be with... well let’s just say my reasons were selfish” he said as she swallowed his drink and poured another. 

“A way to be with Charlotte I believe you were about to say. Don’t look so surprised brother, I am not blind, anyone with eyes could see at the ball that there was something between you two; I know I am regarded as the fool of the family Sidney but I know the look of love when I see it. And now you are about to punish yourself once more for something out of your control,” he said. 

“Arthur, please, you cannot understand...” Sidney said ready to argue.

“I told you once that all I really knew of my older brother was that he was driven to the West Indies with a broken heart, Eliza Campion, when she was alive took many years from you, do not let her death do the same thing.” And with that Arthur knew that it was best to leave Sidney to himself, he was still in shock. As Arthur walked to the door he looked back at his brother, the thought of Eliza Campion had hurt him for many years; Arthur hoped her ghost would not do the same. 

Later that evening Georgiana found she could not sleep so she decided to write some letters, she knew that Sidney would not be in the frame of mind to let everyone know the events that had taken place so she took that worry from him. It would be best that she informed Mary and Esther at the same time, and hopefully they would tell the one person she was struggling to tell.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentines Day - Thank you all again for your kind comments, I read them all and they are very much appreciated.

Sidney woke the next morning still sat upright in the chair, he looked at the empty bottle in front of him, he did not so much sleep but passed out. He leant forward and rested his head in his hands, he still could not believe everything that had happened, she was gone, really gone and now it would be left to him to sort arrangements. He wasn’t even sure as to any requests or wishes that she had, the truth was they didn’t really know one another, not in the closeness that two people about to marry should. Eliza thought she knew Sidney, but that boy was long gone, however she had not changed from the headstrong girl he once knew, only now he had seen clearly the parts he had brushed aside, the parts of someone that you choose to ignore when you are young and in love. 

He knew he would need to go to her home, he needed to speak with the butler, hopefully he would know where she kept her business papers and such. He would need to contact the funeral directors - he would need to do everything, but all he wanted to do was drink some more and forget but he could not, there was no running away this time. 

Downstairs, Arthur, Diana and Georgiana were all trying to eat breakfast whilst each closely watching the door waiting for Sidney appear. 

“Should I go and wake him? Diana said feeling helpless. 

At that moment Sidney walked through the door and answered her. 

“No need Diana, I am up, there is much for me to do today, I have no time to wallow in my own self-pity. But thank you sister, for your concern.” He smiled at her and rested his hand briefly on her shoulder as he moved to his seat. 

“I have made you a list of things we think you will need to do, and things that we can help you with. I have already written to Mary and Lady Babington to inform them of recent events. Arthur will go with you today to the house, and before you argue I do not think that you should be left alone. I have also sent a note to Lady Susan and asked her for dinner. Judging by the animosity you received from her friends it would be best to speak with her regarding the vicious rumours that they will undoubtedly spread,” said Georgiana. 

“Thank you for writing the letters and yes it would be useful to have Arthur with me, but Georgiana believe me when I say I do not give a fig about what they think of me. Arthur, I would like to leave shortly if you please.” And then he left the room. 

Sidney and Arthur left Bedford Place and took the short journey to Eliza’s house. When they arrived, they were welcomed and the butler showed them into the small office. 

“Sir, I understand this is a sad time for you but the staff were wondering what was going to happen to them,” the butler said, clearly feeling uncomfortable. 

“I understand that this is a worrying time for you all, I am here today to go through Mrs Campions papers, I will contact the law firm handling her affairs and then I will have a clear picture of her wishes. Please be sure you will be the first to know. For now, please try to carry on as normal as you can. Thank you, Thomas,” said Sidney. 

Sidney and Arthur then began to go through the files of papers in the desk, they came across paperwork from her lawyer’s office and sent a letter to them explaining the situation. After a couple of hours, Thomas the butler entered the room to tell Sidney that the constable from yesterday was here again along with the doctor. 

“Please show them in Thomas, and bring some tea.” Sidney ordered. 

Both the men entered the room. 

“Well Mr Parker you waste no time I see, and you sir, you are?” the constable asked looking Arthur’s direction. 

“This is my brother Arthur Parker, he has come to help me today. Do you have more questions for me? Although I have no more answers than I had yesterday.” Sidney answered him shortly. 

“No Mr Parker, I have no more questions, I have come to inform you that the magistrate has decided that this matter is no more than a tragic accident and there will no further investigation. I have sent this instruction to the funeral directors so that they can proceed with any instruction you give them. Please accept my condolences. Good day Mr Parker.” And with that he left but the doctor who had been quiet the whole time stayed behind. 

“Doctor, is there something I can do for you? I thought you had come together?” Sidney asked.

“We did come together of sorts Mr Parker, I was called by the magistrate this morning to discuss the events of yesterday and I decided to attend with the constable as I feel there is something that you should know. In these situations, when we argue with a loved one and then something happens we tend to blame ourselves, however I hope that is not the case here.” He said with genuine affection to Sidney. 

“Doctor, if there is information you wish to tell me then please get to the point,” Sidney said, not wishing to talk about his feelings with anyone. He gestured for the doctor to take a seat and Arthur moved to the back of the room. 

“You will remember when I visited Mrs Campion a few days ago, I examined her following her reports of a fever. Well, the fever had subsided but I noticed the increase of swelling in her legs and abdomen, it is what we call dropsy. We are unsure as to what is the cause and this swelling had been happening for sometime. Mrs Campion had been ill before her trip to Sanditon but seemed to make a recovery, however the swelling did not go away but seemed to increase. The truth is that people that have this swelling we think have problems within the body, death is usually not far behind. In my opinion Mrs Campion’s health was already failing. I do not think she was long for this earth, in fact it may not have been the fall that ended her life but rather the shock from it on her body,” the doctor explained. 

Sidney sat there stunned, trying to process the information. 

“She...she was already ill? She never mentioned a thing,” he said. 

“Mrs Campion refused to accept that she was ill Mr Parker, she believed the swelling was nothing serious, I advised her not to travel but to rest. She would not hear of it. I hope that this information brings you some peace,” he said as he stood up to leave. He nodded to both Sidney and Arthur and left the room. 

Sidney sat there, unable to speak when Arthur appeared next to him. The news lingered in the air, both unable to speak about the information that had been presented to them. 

“Come brother, there is still much to be done,” Arthur said knowing that his brother would want to process the information and not discuss it yet. 

Once all the paperwork had been organised and letters sent to the appropriate persons, Sidney informed Thomas he would return in the morning to see to any responses that may have returned. He was exhausted from the days events and just wanted to go home and be left alone. 

When they arrived back at Bedford Place, Lady Susan had already arrived and was being entertained by Diana and Georgiana. 

“Good evening Mr Parker, please accept my condolences for the passing of Mrs Campion,” she said kindly

“Thank you, Lady Susan, if you will excuse me, I do not feel like eating or entertaining guests this evening.” He bowed his head and left the room. 

Later that evening, a knock came at the door of the upstairs lounge area. It was Lady Susan, Sidney rose from his chair but she waved him to stay seated. She joined him on the opposite chair. 

“I can see that no words will bring you any comfort at the moment, and I am unsure whether this is grief or guilt or both that you are feeling. However, Georgiana explained to me the reaction of Mrs Campion’s friends yesterday. I can assure you that I will do everything I can to quash any rumours or disparity of your reputation Mr Parker. I know that you do not care for the opinion of the Ton but any future Mrs Parker may not want any gossip by association,” Lady Susan said bluntly.

“Thank you but I am sure that there will be no prospect of any Mrs Parker’s in future once the news of Eliza reaches their ears. I think the damage of Sidney Parker has wreaked quite enough lives, don’t you? I am not worthy of anything pure, I am a curse on even the most hateful of people. I appreciate your concern Lady Susan and I know that the concern is more for your special friend Miss Heywood but be certain of this, I would never taint Charlotte with whatever curse seems to follow me where Eliza Campion is concerned and I believe it will follow me even in death. If you will excuse me again I am very tired from todays news. Good evening.” And with that he left the room. 

Sidney lay on his bed, he was angry, Eliza had lied to him again, repeatedly, about her wealth, her business and now her health. This explains her eagerness to get married he thought, but then she would have married him knowing that she was sick. He had been so horrible to her, so cruel at times, Lady Susan was right. Was it grief or guilt or anything at all? She was gone but he had grieved for the girl he loved a long time ago but the woman she became he felt nothing for and what type of man did that make him? Then there was Charlotte, he was finally free but would it be fair to ask her to be with him, someone who was capable of feeling nothing but a sense of duty for the woman that he was to marry? She deserved better, she was so pure, so kind, she even wished them well in their future. He would never be free, Eliza’s memory would make sure of that whether she meant to or not.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath reaches far and wide, everyone is hearing the news.....

Mary and Tom were having breakfast when their maid handed Mary a letter that had been expressed from London, she opened the letter and had to read the contents twice before she set the letter down on the table. 

“Mary, is everything alright?” Tom asked, noticing Mary’s change in demeanour. 

“The letter is from Georgiana, she...She states that Eliza is dead, that she had a fall two days ago. Oh Tom, poor Sidney,” Mary said. 

“Mary, may I see the letter please?” Tom asked as he rose from his seat to comfort his wife.

Mary passed the Tom the letter, he stood there and read the contents. Georgiana explained that Eliza had passed away due to a fall from down the stairs and that Sidney was trying to organise her affairs but she was concerned about him. 

“Mary, I must leave for London, you may accompany if you wish. Yes, in fact I think it is best that we both go. I will make the arrangements and I think that you should make your way to Sanditon House, I am unsure if Georgiana will have thought to tell Lord Babington,” Tom said. 

Mary agreed, she saw to the children and then left Trafalgar House. On her way she thought about not only relaying the news to the Babington’s but to Charlotte. She arrived at Sanditon House and was escorted into the library. A moment later Esther Babington appeared. 

“Good Morning Mrs Parker, if you are here about a letter from Georgiana that was expressed from London then we already have received a copy. Babington is currently planning to leave for London and before you ask, no, we have not yet informed Charlotte. I am not sure what to say really. I may not have liked Mrs Campion but I did not wish this upon her,” Esther said sadly. 

“Tom and myself are leaving for London today and Lord Babington is welcome to accompany us. I think that both of us together would be best way to tell Charlotte. I know that she will immediately be worried about Sidney and want to try and help but I think it is best that she stays here for the time being,” said Mary.

“I agree” said Esther as she rang for the maid to fetch Charlotte. 

Charlotte was eating her breakfast with Lady Denham who was unusually quiet this morning. The maid entered and passed the message that Lady Babington required her presence as soon as possible. Charlotte excused herself from the table and went to the library where she found Esther sitting with Mary, and both of them had worried looks on their faces.   
“Mary, Esther, is everything alright?” she asked wearily. 

“Charlotte, we have received a letter from Georgiana, it seems that Eliza Campion had an accident and died.” Esther decided to tell Charlotte directly, there was no easy way of relaying this type of news. 

Charlotte stood there, stunned, and then her thoughts turned to Sidney and how he must be feeling and coping. She noticed that Esther and Mary watching her closely.   
“That is indeed shocking, and I am sorry for her and I shall say a prayer for her. Pray, what can I do to help?” Charlotte asked. 

“Tom, Lord Babington and I will be leaving for London today, I would be grateful if you have any spare time to check in on the children. I do not think we should take them with us but they would benefit from a friendly face now and again if Lady Denham and Lady Babington can spare you.” Mary thought it may be best to try and keep Charlotte busy. 

“Of course, I will ensure that Charlotte visits with the children for as long as you are in London.” Esther smiled. 

With that, Charlotte left Mary and Esther to their arrangements and returned to her room. She was in shock. That was not the news she expected to hear with regards to Mrs Campion. She was sad for her, despite the feelings between the three of them. Her thoughts ran to Sidney, she knew him well enough to know that he would take all the burden of this on himself, and she was powerless to help him. It was out of the question that she go to his side, to help, to be there for him. Again, they were stuck in this middle ground, not together yet never really apart. She thought about sending him a letter, but then what would she say? It would add nothing but misery to him, another burden. All she could do was continue on as she had, help Mary with the children and wait for any news. 

Lord Babington arrived at Trafalgar House as Tom was giving instructions to the coachman. 

“Babington, please pass your luggage, Mary is just saying goodbye to the children then we can be on our way.” 

Mary joined the two of them and they embarked on their journey. The journey seemed to take an age. They spoke briefly about Mrs Campion, then the conversation moved to Sidney. 

“I am worried that he will retreat back into himself due to this,” said Tom worriedly. 

“He will surely be feeling the pain and burden of this accident, we know him well enough to know this for certain. All that we can do is ensure he does not dive head first into despair,” Mary said. 

“I agree, once everything is in order and the funeral has taken place I think we should bring him back to Sanditon, whether he will agree is a different matter,” said Babington.   
They arrived at Bedford Place later that evening. Diana and Georgiana greeted the three travellers. It seemed that Sidney and Arthur were still at Mrs Campions house, organising her affairs and had earlier had a meeting with the lawyers managing her business affairs, though they did not have any more information as neither of them had yet returned. 

Earlier that day, Sidney and Arthur were still organising paperwork, when Thomas the butler announced that one of the partners of the law firm had arrived and wished to speak with Mr Parker. 

“Show them in Thomas, thank you.” Sidney said. 

The lawyer entered the office, he was a tall, thin man and went by the name of Mr Bowles. 

“Mr Parker, my name is Mr Bowles, I managed your fiancée’s business affairs and private accounts before her tragic passing. I have come today as there are many things we shall need to discuss.” He nodded in acknowledgment to Arthur also. 

Sidney gestured for him to take a seat, Arthur sat nearby. 

“Mrs Campion was as you know a woman of large fortune, inherited from her late husband. If of course you had been married the entirety of this would have been left to you. Mrs Campion did however have a will that preceded your marriage. Most of her fortune has been left to her niece, the daughter of her sister who I am to believe Mrs Campion did not have the best relationship with. She has however, made provision for you too Mr Parker, a very sizable provision along with this house.” Mr Bowles said smiling to Sidney. 

“I have contacted Eliza’s remaining family and they are due to arrive in two days’ time, and from that moment on I would be grateful if any matters that concern her money or estate are conducted with them. I would also like to make it very clear Mr Bowles, that I do not want a penny from this estate, I am happy to sign over this house and any monies given to me to Eliza’s niece,” Sidney said as plainly as he could, trying to hide the contempt for her money from his voice. 

“Mr Parker, I am sure that the shock of the situation is compelling you to say such things. This house alone is worth a considerable sum and I am sure that if you did not wish to live here any longer that a buyer would not be hard to find, and also may I add the sum of money that has been left to you is also quite considerable. I would beseech you to think about this carefully,” said Mr Bowles, clearly confused as to why Sidney would reject such generosity. 

“Mr Bowles, I appreciate your advice but again I must say that I do not want anything from this estate. I am happy to sign any paperwork that will relieve me of such entitlement. I would be grateful if you could draw this up and have this ready in time for her niece’s arrival. That is my final say on the matter,” Sidney said. 

Mr Bowles realised that Sidney could not be swayed in the matter and agreed to do what he had asked and would return with such paperwork for them to sign. Sidney also passed on the name of the undertakers as the paperwork they had come across showed that Eliza had already made plans for her funeral and had arranged for this to be paid for. He wanted to ensure her wishes had been carried out. Mr Bowles left and Sidney grabbed two glasses and a bottle of wine and sat with Arthur. 

“I do not think that you should come back to this house again Sidney unless it is to sign that paperwork, it does not do well to be here and to be reminded of that accident. And my dear brother, it was an accident,” Arthur said kindly to his brother. 

“I think you may be right Arthur, I have done all that I can for now,” Sidney admitted. 

They sat there again in silence for the most part, exchanging comments of paperwork that they had come across, Arthur then convinced Sidney it was time to leave and go home.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have managed to write 4 chapters - hope you like them. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for taking time to comment on the story and I am grateful for you taking the time to read it.

Arthur and Sidney arrived home to be greeted by three new faces. He greeted them all with hugs and noticed the concerned looks on all their faces. 

“I see that Georgiana has asked you to come as she is concerned, judging by the look on all your faces. Well for the first time this week I am hungry, we can talk over dinner.” Sidney walked towards the dining room with his family and friends in tow. 

As they sat down, Sidney realised everyone was watching him anxiously. He smiled to himself, their concern was touching but a little annoying. He decided to tell them all about the provisions that had been bequeathed to him, he added that he had no intention of taking anything from her estate and that it was not up for any discussion. They continued to have dinner, then the gentlemen all went into the parlour to talk and drink. After some time had passed, everyone decided it was time to leave. 

“Sidney, I am sorry old chap, I cannot imagine everything you have been through, Esther and I are here for anything that you need. If you will excuse me, I am going to get settled into our house and I will return in the morning. Try not to drown your sorrows too much.” Babington smiled and hugged his best friend. 

Arthur and Diana also both left, as with Mary and Tom now here they were comforted that Georgiana and Sidney would not be alone. Tom and Sidney sat in the parlour, whiskey at the table.

“How are you doing Sidney, none of this can be easy for you?” Tom asked. 

“My feelings are not important Tom” Sidney replied.

“You’re wrong about that Sidney, you are important to a great many of us, everyone here tonight came because of their concern for you. Try to remember that in your darkest moments.”

“Do not worry Tom, this is not like before, I will not be running off to sea.” Sidney said

“I think the only reason that you would not is because you couldn’t bear to be so far from Charlotte.” Tom decided to address the elephant in the room. 

Sidney stiffened at the mention of her name. 

“Charlotte is not going to be burdened with me Tom, but to answer you honestly yes she is the reason why I have not decided to take off running again.” There was no point in trying to deny how he felt about her now. 

“You are not a burden to her, to me, or to any of us. I understand that now is not the time to speak of such things but promise me that you will not ruin any chance of future happiness due to feeling unworthy. You, my brother, are worth more than you know. The sacrifices you were willing to make for your family - for me, shows that your character is beyond reproach, please know that.” Tom said as he drained his drink and left his brother to his thoughts. 

Sidney smiled at his brother, unsure what to do with such honesty. He closed his eyes and the face before him was one with large brown eyes, and a smile that lit up his heart. It was all such a mess. He felt confused with feelings of guilt and something else, although he was unsure what the other feeling was. Would Charlotte even want him now? After everything he had put her through and now, the gossips, no matter what Lady Susan or the official magistrates say, will always have their opinions and he did not want to subject her to such things. He smiled when he thought of what she would say to such people, she did not suffer fools, he knew that personally. That was part of her character that he loved so very much, she had an opinion and she would not be cowered into supressing it. Charlotte Heywood was a lady like no other. He once told her she was more than equal to any women at that party but the truth was they were not equal to her, for they did not have her kindness, wit, beauty or her mind. She was one of a kind and at this moment so far out of his grasp. 

Charlotte and Lady Denham spent some time in the library after dinner and Lady Denham decided she wanted to Charlotte to read Romeo and Juliet, when a quote caught in Charlottes throat;

Love is heavy and light, bright and dark, hot and cold, sick and healthy, asleep and awake, it is everything except what it is…

“Shakespeare knew how to pierce the soul did he not Miss Heywood? Love is many things to many people many times over. Love is supposed to be the beginning and the end, yet life, and its complications get in the way.” Lady Denham said as she noticed the gleam of water entering Charlottes eyes.

“Sidney Parker is a strong man and he will recover from this. If it had been you that had passed then I would be worried for his life, apart from Babington I have not seen a man so in love with a woman as he is with you. These are words you may not want to hear but such is your sadness at the moment, I think it would be wise for you to remember that. Now if you would escort me to my bedroom I am very tired.” 

Charlotte smiled and helped Lady Denham, before she looked in on Esther who felt slightly ill after dinner and retired early. Esther was asleep when Charlotte looked in on her so she went to her own room and changed into her nightdress. She sat at her favourite chair looking out to the park which was completely in darkness, the evenings were becoming shorter. She wondered how Sidney was fairing. In truth she wanted so much to speak with him, she felt a little ashamed of herself for feeling this way considering the tragedy of the circumstances that he found himself in, but she knew that he would be carrying the burden of this on his shoulders, and choosing to do so alone. She hoped that Mary would send word soon.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are about to get real!!!!!

Sidney spent the next day with his family, all of the Parkers together, and they made Sidney take a walk outside through Hyde Park. That evening, after dinner, Babington arrived with a surprise guest. 

“Good evening all,” Crowe said as he walked into Bedford Place. 

“Crowe, how the devil are you? It is good to see you.” Said Sidney genuinely happy to see his friend. 

“Well, due to recent events I suspect that venturing out is not in your plans so I have brought cards and a good brandy. Arthur, Tom, please join us, the ladies too if they so wish,” said Crowe. 

“No thank you Crowe, we ladies have other matters to discuss” said Georgiana, giving him a distasteful look as she turned to walk out of the room, with Mary and Diana following her. 

“I am sure your ward does not think well of me Parker, and I am at a loss to think why?” Crowe said laughing as the men went to the upstairs sitting room. 

Crowe was the tonic that Sidney needed, someone who would not question him on his feelings, or expect him to talk in depth about the weeks’ events. For the next few hours, they played cards, drank copious amounts of brandy and listened to tales of Crowe. It seemed Lady Denham’s ward Clara, from what Sidney could fathom seemed to be with child, although Crowe’s drunken state made it hard to decipher. When Crowe started to fall asleep, Babington decided it was best to see him home, Tom had passed out in the chair, and the last person standing with Sidney was surprisingly Arthur. 

“Please brother tell me that you will not abandon me, my so-called friends are now leaving me to finish this fine brandy” Sidney slurred slightly. 

“I will stay with you brother, I think Tom is settled on the chaise longue for now. I will stay with this wine as brandy does not suit my constitution,” he said as he took his seat opposite Sidney. 

Sidney poured another drink and Arthur noticed that for a while he seemed lifted, not a man with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Tomorrow would be a different day, a day to meet relatives, to finalise details. Sidney raised his glass. 

“This is to you brother, I know I have not been there for you, but these past few days you have shown yourself to be a good man Arthur, and I am grateful for it, I have not shown you the respect you deserve.” 

Arthur smiled, he had longed for a better relationship with his older brother, and it was strange that tragedy had brought them together. 

“Do not mention such things Sidney, in truth we have not known one another, like passing ships in the night. I was still so young when you left and then when you returned you seemed so intent on keeping us all at bay that I took this to be your way, and I accepted it,” Arthur said truthfully. 

“You are right Arthur, when I returned I raged against responsibility, you saw how I was with Georgiana, with Tom, you and Diana. You did not deserve such censure, but it’s easier to keep the world and its people at bay than to risk hurt when you have been so badly hurt before.”

“Does it not become tiresome or even lonely to live such a way Sidney? I cannot imagine a day without Diana, and now I have Georgiana as my friend, to not to surround yourself with people who love and value you is a sad way to live,” Arthur said. 

“When you deserve good things and good people Arthur, they come to you, I however, do not deserve such things especially now.”

“Why? Why not now? You need to stop with this guilt Sidney! It was an accident! No one forced Eliza to come after you- she chose to do that. You did not put an obstacle in her path, and she was ill, you need to remember that. She chose to not tell you that either. I mean not to speak ill of the dead but she kept many secrets it seems; she broke you heart once and now it seems in death she still has some hold on you,” Arthur said becoming annoyed.

“You do not understand, I know that it is not my fault but I have other reasons for feeling guilt Arthur and I beg you to leave it alone,” Sidney replied also becoming annoyed. 

“Then make me understand! For god’s sake Sidney let it out, whatever it is, has she not given you enough misery in the past that she must now hold the key to your future?”

“Arthur, please stop...” Sidney did not want to carry on with the conversation.

“No, I will not, I will ask you every day why it is that you feel you need to carry this guilt, do you understand? I will not risk losing my brother...”

At that moment Sidney exploded.

“I WAS RELIEVED! RELIEVED THAT I WAS NO LONGER BOUND TO A WOMAN I COULD NOT STAND TO BE AROUND… RELIEVED THAT I WAS FREE! WHAT TYPE OF MAN THINKS THOSE THINGS IN THE LIGHT OF SOMEONES DEATH? TELL ME! I DO NOT FEEL GUILT, I FEEL DISGUSTED WITH MYSELF! HOW COULD SHE LOVE A MAN LIKE THAT IF SHE KNEW THAT WAS MY ONLY REACTION, THAT MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS TO RUN STRAIGHT TO HER? ANSWER ME ARTHUR...HOW?” Sidney bellowed, letting it all out.

“Charlotte...” Arthur whispered. 

“Sidney, there is nothing wrong with how you feel. Arthur is right, it was a tragedy what happened to her but you were honest with her, she knew where you heart lay. Yet she still kept that noose around your neck knowing that you would do your duty for your family, even for her reputation. The only person here who should feel guilt is me, for putting you and all this family in this position,” said Tom as he rose from his sleep. 

“It is about time this family stopped appointing blame and guilt and looked towards the future. There has been too much blame and running away. Sidney, Charlotte knows what type of man you are and is it plain for all to see that she loves you. Any sane person would have felt the way you do, you were like a caged animal and now you are free. Feel sadness for a life taken, but do not allow her to take anymore of your life. Now I think it is time for us all to retire, we will need to be at our best in a few hours,” Arthur said as he raised and held his hand out to his brother. 

The three of them hugged one another, and it seemed a barrier had been broken between the brothers. Sidney appreciated their words, whether he could live up to them was another thing.

Charlotte woke the next morning and busied herself with her jobs for the day. She had breakfast with Esther and Lady Denham, and then arranged to go into town to look in on the children for Mary and to check that Mr Stringer did not need any assistance, as she had also promised to keep an eye on things whilst everyone was gone. Esther decided that she would like to accompany Charlotte into town and they could enjoy a walk back along the sea front. 

Once Lady Denham was settled, Charlotte and Esther took the coach to town and called into Trafalgar House just as the children were leaving for their school day.   
“Charlotte! Charlotte! Mama and Papa have gone to visit Uncle Sidney in London so we have to be on our best behaviour and I have to be a good brother and watch over my sisters!” said a very serious Henry as Jenny his older sister rolled her eyes. 

“Well, if you are very good and behave for your governess and teachers then how about we all have tea tomorrow after school?” Charlotte said. 

“Yes please! Can we play some games too? Will this pretty Lady be with you also? asked Alicia, looking at Esther. 

“If I am invited then I would very much like to join you. In fact, why don’t we have tea at the big house, and then you can spend some time in Lady Denham’s park, if you would like to?” Esther replied.

The children gave a cheer and made Charlotte promise again and then ran off to school. Charlotte went into the Parker office to check for business letters, she sent a note with Nellie asking Mr Stringer to come to the house if he has time. Then she saw the letter that Georgiana had sent to Mary and Tom, she closed it over, not wanting to snoop or even read the contents as she knew it would only add to her worry. 

“I can tell you what the contents of the letter was if that will ease your mind?” Esther offered. 

“No thank you, I am sure that Georgiana would have informed me if there was anything that I could do.” Charlotte said quickly. 

“I think the only person that would be able to help Sidney at this moment would be you, but unfortunately I do not think that is appropriate given the gossiping that the Ton likes to do. Vile place! I only go and tolerate them for Babington, otherwise I am quite happy away from the place, although Lady Susan I must excuse from that statement.” 

“I have only the one real experience amongst them and that was a party I attended with the two Mr Parkers and Lord Babington, it was also the first time that I saw Mrs Campion, although we were not formally introduced.” Charlotte said, thinking of that special ball. 

“Be grateful for that. The Ton are there to be seen and then move on once they are bored. That is why I always thought Tom Parker was mad for wanting their attention. I understand they have some money but they do not have loyalty and that’s what a place like this need, people who will return time and time again as Georgiana said,” Esther said letting her distaste show on her face. 

At that moment Mr Stringer was shown into the office, He stated that the men had completed the renovations they could do and would do what they could with the exterior, but if the weather started to change they would have to halt. Esther also went over some details with him for the house. They had also made excellent progress there too, and Fred had been doing a fine job. He wished the ladies well and left them to their day. Esther observed James Stringer as he left. 

“I do think Mr Stringer likes you Charlotte. Poor man, I am sure we could find a suitable lady for him,” Esther said smiling. 

“Yes, he is a fine young man and will make someone very happy one day, but alas it will not be me. Now, shall we take a walk back to Sanditon House? Lord Babington will not be happy if I have you out in the cold too long.” Charlotte ordered Esther out of the room and house. 

“Yes, well, Lord Babington can take it up with me if he is feeling brave enough” Esther said as they walked towards the door. 

They walked home along the front and chatted about lunch the next day with the children but Charlotte was distracted. Her mind kept going back to Sidney. She wondered how he was, and she knew he did not care for London or its society much yet he would have to deal with them knowing that Mrs Campion was so involved for surely everyone would want to pay their respects. Suddenly she realised that Esther had asked her a question, and had stopped walking as she trundled on ahead.

“Charlotte Heywood, at least you could pretend to listen to me! However, I expect worrying about Sidney Parker is rather high on your list. I should have word from Babington soon and I am happy to pass on anything that I discover, and before you say that you would rather not know, please do not. That little crease in your forehead that you have had since I told you the news proves otherwise,” Esther said knowingly. 

Charlotte smiled she was so very grateful to Esther, she had become a good friend.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A new character, will Sidney ever go home??

Sidney had woken that morning with a dreadful headache. He had indulged that evening and revealed more than he had planned, but he had to admit that he felt lighter. Somehow, admitting to his brothers the worst that he felt about himself had lessened the feelings of repulsion and disgust. 

As he dressed and was making his way downstairs, he came across Mary in the hallway and he suddenly had the idea to ask her to accompany him today. 

“Good morning Mary, may I be so bold as to ask a favour from you? I am to meet with Eliza’s niece today and I am not sure I can manage alone, I am unsure of the reception from her I am to receive and I have been known to not be so tactful at times,” he said as he smiled. 

“Of course, Sidney I would be happy to. Tom is not yet risen but I will leave a message with Georgiana, when would you like to leave?” she asked. 

“I am going downstairs for some tea and to speak with Georgiana, then we can leave.” Sidney nodded to her and went to see Georgiana.

As he entered the dining room, Georgiana was there studying the newspaper very intently. 

“Good morning Georgiana, may I ask what you are looking for so intently?” 

“I was looking at the announcements, you will have to make one soon Sidney, people will talk if you do not. Not that I care what they think but her friends already have a low opinion of you. I will not have them use anymore gossip against you.” She said. 

“Yes, I do believe you are right, I will propose something today whilst I am at the house. I am thinking that once this is all over that you should return to Sanditon with Mary and Tom, English weather this time of year can be unpredictable and I do not want you travelling late in the coming months.” 

“Are you coming back also? If not then I will be staying with you.” She said defiantly. 

“I am not sure of my plans, once the funeral has taken place I cannot just run back to Sanditon. It would not be proper,” he said sadly. 

“Who cares what they think? Your family is in Sanditon and therefore it is best that you are with them, also Arthur and Diana are going to come for Christmas and I will not have you spend it alone.”

Sidney smiled but did not give her an answer. He told her of the plans for the day and invited her to come with them. She declined stating errands of her own to run, but she would see them all for dinner, although she did want to speak with Tom about some ideas she had. 

Mary and Sidney left Bedford Place and made there way to Eliza’s home, Thomas the butler greeted them and said that they expected Mrs Campion’s niece Anne Clarke that afternoon. Sidney and Mary went to the office and ensured that all paperwork was ready for Anne to see. Thomas knocked on the door and announced that Mr Collins from the undertakers was here to speak with him. Sidney asked him to show him to the parlour and he would attend him shortly.

“Mary, please accompany me, I am not very good at the organisation of such things.” He gestured for her to follow him. 

Mr Collins was waiting in the parlour and bowed very solemnly when they entered. 

“Mr Parker, please let me offer my sincerest condolences for your loss, such a lady in her prime.” 

“Thank you, Mr Collins. Please be seated. This is my sister-in-law Mrs Parker, now how can I help you?” he asked. 

“Well Sir, I am here to discuss the arrangements to have Mrs Campions body returned to the house before her funeral. She has been attended to by our ladies and it is customary for a lady of her stature to be brought home before her journey to her final resting place. As her funeral will be in three days’ time, we will bring her home tomorrow. Do you and the family plan to sit and keep vigil or can I arrange our professional watchers to help ease that burden.” 

Sidney had not thought about this, he looked to Mary in a silent call of help. Mary recognising this immediately jumped to answer Mr Collins. 

“Mr Collins, as you can see Mr Parker has many things on his mind, may I ask that you arrange for your watchers to attend from the evening time as this was not Mr Parker’s home and he would not want to burden the staff with such as job. As a family we will be here during the day. Have you been in contact with the Reverend Higham with regards to the service and has your funeral furnisher arranged horses and carriages and such?” Mary enquired. 

“Yes, Mrs Parker, all has been arranged, we will collect Mrs Campion from the house and then proceed to the church. I note that the reverend has also asked that one of the family speak and I note that Mr Parker, you were to be married therefore I presume this will fall to you? He enquired. 

Mr Collins continued on mostly speaking to Mary about the service and delivery of Eliza back to her house. Sidney had not thought for a moment that he would be asked to speak but surely it was his duty to, his last duty. In front of her friends who disliked him so much and his family who knew the truth of his feelings. He had no idea how he was going to do this, at that moment Mr Collins addressed him again. 

“Mr Parker, I can see that this is troubling time for you so I shall take my leave. We will arrive tomorrow morning, if you could allow one of the furnishers access to the room that you would like to use later today so that they can prepare the room.” 

Sidney nodded, still stunned and Mary again took over and showed Mr Collins to the door and he heard her informing Thomas of the plans. He looked at the time. Anne would be here soon. Mary came back into the room and she sat down next to Sidney. 

“I take it you did not make plans for her return? Not to worry, I have spoken with Thomas and he will make sure that the library is prepared for the furnisher this evening. Now, I know that you are still processing this information but we need to pull together for Miss Clarke’s arrival soon, she will want to know all the particulars. Just a few more days and this will all be over,” Mary said kindly. 

Mary busied herself with helping Thomas as Sidney sat at the desk in the office trying to think of what he was going to say. Not noticing the time, it was not long before Mary interrupted him and asked him to come to the parlour as Miss Clarke was due very soon. 

Anne Clarke was the daughter of Eliza Campion’s late sister. She had a good relationship with her Aunt, better than her mothers had been. News of her death had saddened her greatly and then she had received a mysterious letter from her fiancée Sidney Parker asking her to come to the house before the funeral as he had some business he would like to discuss. She had heard Mr Parker’s name in passing over the years usually when her mother spoke spitefully about her Aunt, she knew that they had been friends when they were younger but her Aunt Eliza had married another man. Her mother had always told her Aunt what a mistake she had made and how she had married for money, so she was surprised when following the death of her Uncle she received news of an engagement with the same Sidney Parker. Anne arrived at her Aunts house, took a deep breath and knocked the door. 

Sidney and Mary heard the knock at the door and both raised from their seats to greet their guest. Thomas knocked the door and showed in Anne Clarke, Mary gasped, it was like she had seen a ghost, Anne Clarke was the spitting image of her now late Aunt Eliza, even Sidney noticed, only Anne was taller and he noticed she seemed very nervous. Mary approached the young girl and curtseyed and introduced her to Sidney who smiled, trying to make her feel comfortable. 

“Please take a seat Ms Clarke, may I pour you some tea?” Mary asked kindly. 

“Yes, thank you. Mr Parker it is very nice to meet you although it under such sad circumstances, I had hoped it was to be at your wedding” she said and she noticed Sidney stiffen.   
“Miss Clarke, thank you, I was sorry to hear that your mother had passed away. I remember her from my younger days, so full of cheer and laughter when we were younger. May I ask after your father, will he be joining you?” Sidney asked.

“Thank you, but my father has been somewhat indisposed since the passing of my mother sir, he is unable to attend many social occasions, he is currently at our hotel but I have brought my maid with me who is downstairs, I hope that is acceptable.” she said sweetly. 

“Of course, well, I think it is only fair that I tell you as to why I called you here. I have been notified that you are to inherit a great deal from your Aunt including her business. Her lawyers will speak with you regarding this after the funeral. I have been bequeathed this house and some money. I do not want any of it. I would like to sign all the property and monies over to you.” 

“Mr Parker, I am not sure I understand. Why would you do such a thing? My Aunt obviously wanted you to have this house, please I beg of you to reconsider,” Anne said extremely shocked. 

“Miss Clarke, I will be honest with you. Your Aunt and I had an arrangement that was born of a financial agreement, this was not a love match, not on my part and it would be against my character to accept such gifts. On the day of your Aunt’s passing, we had quarrelled about our future life and if I am being honest I would tell you that I had asked your Aunt to relinquish me from our engagement. I know that you may think badly of me and it will be no more than I deserve, but I will not accept that which I am not worthy or entitled to. I would be grateful if you could respect my decision and accept this house and money as part of your inheritance. I have already instructed the lawyers to draw up the paperwork so that I can make this official,” he stated, ensuring that she would have no place to argue with him. 

Anne Clarke sat silently for a moment before she answered him. 

“I appreciate your candour Mr Parker, I can see that you are most serious in your decision and if this is what you want, then I accept the terms of your proposal. I have already received a letter from Mr Bowles regarding my inheritance but I wrote to him and asked to discuss this after her funeral. May I ask what arrangements have been made?” 

“Your Aunt had the foresight to arrange most things in advance, it seems that she was ill but she did not disclose this information to a single soul including myself. She is to arrive home tomorrow before her journey to her final resting place in three days’ time. You are more than welcome to move your things to this house immediately if you please. Mr Collins, the undertaker has arranged for a watcher to sit with your Aunt during the late evenings and overnight. I myself have no more business here but I am happy to attend during the day.” 

“Thank you, Mr Parker, I would very much like to spend some time with my Aunt and say my goodbyes. I am happy for you to do the same should you wish, it may ease whatever burden you seem to be carrying. I must leave you now, my father will become restless if I am gone for too long. I will speak with Thomas before I leave and plan for tomorrow. Thank you again for your honesty and generosity at such a time.” And with that Anne curtseyed to both Mary and Sidney and arranged to see them again tomorrow. 

“She seems like a lovely young lady, although I must say she is so very much like Eliza in her looks, I was taken aback at first,” Mary said. 

“Yes, that is very much how Eliza looked when we were younger although her disposition seems more amenable. I am happy that she has agreed to my wishes, I can now leave this house in some good conscience.” He sighed. 

Mary smiled at Sidney, he was brave for admitting his true feelings to her niece, the news could have been received very badly but it was not in Sidney’s nature to lie to people and he would not bequest this house to Anne without telling her the reason as to why. Hopefully this was a step in helping Sidney move on.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter today my friends. 
> 
> Thank you again for your lovely comments.

Chapter 29. 

When Sidney and Mary arrived home, Mary informed Tom and Georgiana about Anne Clarke, and the day’s events. Sidney however, stayed quiet throughout. Dinner that evening was a subdued affair, and Babington had asked to be excused from the open invitation as he had to help Crowe with his situation. Georgiana and Tom talked about the plans they had discussed for Sanditon, Tom mentioned that the whole family would be home for Christmas and how excited the children would be. Sidney smiled, and he excused himself.   
He went to his room, he was exhausted and wanted nothing but some peace and quiet. He lay on his bed and thought about his life up to this point. He could scarcely believe the events that had taken place, he thought about one event in particular, the day he met Mary and her companion on their walk. He had been so taken aback when he laid his eyes on Charlotte, he had never had that type of feeling before, even with Eliza. He was struck by her beauty, and eyes that immediately pierced him. He was so unbelievably rude to her; he’d had no intention of being caught up with any young lady. Her accurate observations about his family had shocked and hurt him a little but she seemed to have such an insight it scared him, so he pushed her away and kept trying to do so, yet time and time again she proved herself to be unlike any other young lady he had ever known. She was brave, unselfish, kind and intelligent. He loved every part of her and yet in the end he brought her pain, and even in the face of it she held her composure, and reminded him of his duty. He missed her so very much, she was the person he wanted in his life forever. 

Charlotte lay in her bed, unable to sleep. A memory came to her mind, the one she usually dreamt of. Their dance. She would never in her lifetime forget that dance and the way Sidney held her, she remembered every moment. The way that he pulled her close and held her hand as he guided her across the floor, the intimacy of the moment sent goose bumps all over her. Even now, in this dark time she wanted to hold him close, to share whatever burdens he faced, to speak with him. A single tear fell down her cheek. It was all so unfair, she felt guilty at giving into her despair considering the fate that had befallen other people but it felt like a constant battle for the both of them. Fate was constantly thwarting them it seemed at every moment. Will this ever end she thought, would this feeling of wanting someone so much ever leave her? Would any man be able to replace him in her affections?

The next day Sidney went to Eliza’s house to ensure that Thomas had everything ready for her arrival back to her home. Thomas assured him all was done; the furnisher had attended to dress the room and they had nothing to do but wait. Anne arrived a short time later with her father, a small portly nervous type of man who was brief in his attentions to Sidney before asking Thomas to show him to his room.   
“Please do not be offended by my father’s disinterest Mr Parker, he finds any social situation unpleasant, especially since my mother passed,” Anne explained.   
At that moment there was a knock at the door, Sidney went out to check and saw that the undertakers had arrived with Eliza. Sidney pointed to the room that she was to be placed in. The next few moments felt surreal to Sidney as he watched the coffin of the woman who he once loved brought home for the final time. He waited outside whilst they fixed what they needed to. Sidney gestured for Anne to speak with them before they left and to have them explain the details for the day of the funeral, all the time standing outside the room looking in, not sure if he had to the stomach to sit in there with her.   
That afternoon, without attending to the library he made his excuses and left the house. He told Anne Clarke that he was needed at home and it would be best if she had some time to settle and say her private goodbyes to her Aunt. He left the house and decided to walk home, he needed the air to clear his head. In a few days all would be done, all that would remain would be memories. He had not made up his mind whether he would return straight away to Sanditon, he was unsure what course of action would be acceptable. Bloody mess, he knew what he wanted to do, but that was not an option at this moment. 

Charlotte spent the morning in a quiet attitude, she had not slept well, her mind full of thoughts and memories. Lady Denham did not require much attention that morning and the children were not due until that afternoon. The morning passed with Charlotte writing her letters home, and with that she found herself wanting to write to Sidney, yet what would she say? Would this bring him more misery? The sound of Esther coming into the library snapped her out of her thoughts, the children were coming and they needed to be ready and Charlotte was glad of the distraction. The rest of the afternoon passed very quickly, the children played freely across the park despite the cold weather. Esther had arranged a huge picnic lunch in front of the fire in the parlour and even Lady Denham made an appearance. Charlotte was glad of the laughter and merriment the afternoon brought and was sorry to see the children return home. The rest of the evening passed in discussion with Lady Denham and Esther with regards to Esther’s plans for the birth of her child. The joy was evident when Esther announced she had no plans to leave Sanditon House before the child was born, she did not care for London and felt that Dr Fuchs was more than able to attend her. Charlotte excused herself after dinner, she wanted to try and sleep, but once she rested her head against the pillow and closed her eyes his face was there. 

Sidney joined Babington for dinner that evening, he spoke of his shock when the undertakers arrived to bring Eliza home. Babington being the good friend that he was listened and did not offer any advice or judgement, just friendship. Sidney changed the subject to Babingtons’ upcoming fatherhood, and Crowe’s also. It seemed that Crowe had spent a few enjoyable weeks with Miss Brereton who was now with child, a marriage seemed imminent and Crowe was handling the matter in his usual fashion, high spirits and drink. The two friends talked into the small hours and Babington offered Sidney the use of the guest room but Sidney wished to return home. He needed to ensure that he was fresh for the morning, and he wanted to visit the house before the church service. He wanted to say his own private goodbye.


	30. Chapter 30

The day of the funeral arrived and Sidney kept to his room, he had no appetite and no humour for small talk around the breakfast table. A small tap on the door of his room shook him from his thoughts. 

“Come in” he answered. 

Georgiana appeared and stood beside the half-opened door. 

“I have come to see if you need anything?” She said quietly. 

“No thank you, I will be leaving soon to go to see Eliza before she leaves for the church. You will go with Mary and Tom and I will meet you there,” he said as he walked to her and took her hand. 

“In these past weeks, you have been more than a friend to me, you have been a part of my family. I will always be grateful for your honesty and loyalty to me despite the rockiness of our beginnings. Thank you” he said so sincerely. 

Unable to say anything in return, Georgiana gave Sidney a hug and a small peck on the cheek and left him to finish dressing. 

Sidney said goodbye to everyone and arranged to meet them at the church. 

He arrived at the house to find Anne and her father in the parlour, Anne ensuring all was ready for after the service. Sidney asked if he could have a few moments with Eliza before they arrived to take her, and made his way to the library. He hesitated before he opened the door, the room was decorated in black hanging material with candles giving the only light. He closed the door and slowly walked to where Eliza lay. He laid his hand on the side of the coffin and looked at her peaceful face. The sight of her lying there proved more emotional than he thought it would. 

“I am sorry that our last moments were in anger. I am sorry that I could not love you the way that you wanted me to. I hope that you have found peace. Rest easy Eliza.” He bent to kiss her forehead and for a moment he mourned the girl he once knew. He walked out of the library and informed Anne he was to make his way to the church and would meet her there. 

All the Parkers, Georgiana, Babington, Crowe and even Lady Susan were all there when Sidney arrived. He smiled at this group of people who stood by his side. As they entered the church, he saw that a large number of people were in attendance. As he made his way to the front of the pews, he noticed the slight looks and whispers of Eliza’s friends, their whispers grew a little louder until Lady Susan looked at them all with her withering and defiant stare. Anne Clarke and her father joined Sidney at the front. Sidney had decided not to speak but had chosen hymns and a reading that he thought she would have liked. 

At the end of service, Anne, her father and Sidney stood by the entrance to thank people for attending and to remind them to pay a visit to the house, the burial was a private affair with Sidney’s family, friends and Eliza’s closest friends in attendance. It was a sad moment, no matter their fights or words of hurt. Sidney was sad that her young life was cut short. Once she was lowered into the ground Sidney stood there as everyone made their way back to the carriages, one person stayed behind and Sidney was surprised to see that it was Diana. She stood next to her brother and put her arm through his. 

“Do you remember the last time that we stood in such a place? It feels like a lifetime ago that we said goodbye to our own parents. Arthur and I were so young, I remember you taking my hand and giving me your handkerchief… It’s time to go Sidney, it will not do to dwell on things we cannot change,” she said as she encouraged him to move from the spot. 

Once back at the house, Sidney ensured he played his part and attended those who were kind enough to come and pay their respects. He introduced Anne to Eliza’s friends, he wanted to make sure she had some connections here if she was to make a life for herself here, it was the least he could do for her niece. The hours passed, and people gradually left. Sidney stood in the foyer and took one last look at the house, he thanked Thomas for all his help and asked him to watch over Miss Clarke as she would need his assistance. He then said his goodbyes. 

“Miss Clarke, I shall take my leave. I know that this time is an unhappy one but I do wish you the best in the future and I hope that you make a home here.” He bowed his head as she thanked him also. 

Sidney stepped outside of the house to find Georgiana in a carriage waiting for him. 

“Come Sidney, let’s go home.”

All the Parkers, Georgiana, Babington and Sidney sat in the parlour together, the weight of the last week seeming to lift from everyone. In that moment, Sidney realised something.

“This might be inappropriate at such at time...but I am so very hungry. Arthur, see what bread is in the kitchen and you can make some of your famous toast,” said Sidney. 

Mary, Diana and Arthur headed to the kitchen for supplies, Sidney fixed everyone a drink, the trio came back from the kitchen with arms full of bread, butter and jam and a feast was had. Sidney looked around the group of people around him, his family, blood or not, these were his people, and he could not ask for better. A few months ago, this situation would have been the last thing he would have cared for, sitting here, listening to stories and laughing even in the light of the events of the day. They talked into the small hours until people either passed out or went to bed. 

The next morning, everyone was gathered around the breakfast table when Mary announced that she would need to return to the children soon, and the weather would only start to get worse and make travelling difficult. Georgiana agreed, Diana and Arthur stated that they planned on returning to Sanditon by the weeks’ end. 

“I am going to stay in London for a while longer, I know that Babington is returning in the next day or two so I will send a note to him, perhaps you can all travel together.” Sidney said not looking at anyone. 

“Why are you staying here? There is nothing for you here” Georgiana asked. 

“I am not ready to return yet, it would not be appropriate” Sidney replied. 

“Appropriate for who? Why do you care what they think of you? Come home with your family!” She said raising her voice. 

“I have said NO Georgiana, please do not pursue the matter. I will return when I am ready. Now if you will excuse me,” Sidney said as he abruptly got up and stormed out of the room. 

Sidney was in his room when someone knocked at his door, he sighed, he was not in the mood for an argument with Georgiana.

“Come in” he said sullenly. 

Arthur entered the room. 

“You owe Georgiana an apology, she is just concerned for you,” he said as he sat on the bed next to him. 

“I know” he said wearily. 

“Brother, I am going to speak openly and honestly. Please stop, please stop punishing yourself and Charlotte, surely it must be exhausting torturing yourself all of the time. If you stay here and wallow you will be wasting more precious time, and Eliza will still be wielding that control over you.” Arthur rose to leave, as he approached the door he stopped once more and turned to look at his brother. 

“A choice is before you dear brother, return to Sanditon and start living again or stay here alone with the ghost of a woman you did not love.” And with that Arthur left Sidney to his thoughts. 

Sidney smiled to himself, who knew Arthur was so wise.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Esther has had enough......

Charlotte sat at the desk in Bedford Place, she tried her best to concentrate but it was proving to be difficult. She called to see the children earlier before they left for school. It had been two days since the funeral, and Esther had received word that Lord Babington was to arrive home today, there was no mention of the Parkers or Sidney. Feeling restless she got up and decided to pay a visit over to Mr Stringer, who was overseeing the finishing touches to the buildings that were caught up in the fire. 

As she walked across the street she noticed the chill in the air, the seasons were changing. Mr Stringer was standing outside the building, drawing and looking very serious. Charlotte smiled, Mr Stringer was a good man, after his father had passed, he decided to stay in Sanditon to oversee the rebuild, she hoped that one day he would pursue his dream of becoming an architect. 

“Good day Mr Stringer” she said disturbing him from his deep thought. 

“Well met Miss Heywood, how are you today?” 

“Very well thank you, I hope I am not disturbing you?” She asked. 

“Not at all, I am just ensuring that my drawings are finished and ready for when Mr Parker returns, have you heard when that will be? I was sorry to hear about Mrs Campion, I expect Mr Parker will be in London for the foreseeable future.” 

“I am unsure, I know that Lord Babington is due back today but I am not privy to Mr Parkers’ plans. Actually, it is time that I made my way back to Lady Denham. Goodbye Mr Stringer.” She was unsure why but talking to other people about Sidney always made her uncomfortable. 

Charlotte made her way back to Sanditon House, and as she walked along she wondered how Sidney was. She wished she could give him some words of comfort. He may not come back at all she thought to herself. He could easily oversee the rebuild from London and with the occasional visit. Charlotte breathed deeply, it was time to let it all go she thought, it was selfish of her to be worried that he may not come back, inappropriate even. What did she think? That he would come running back to her? Charlotte felt awful, a woman had died and she was concerned about her own heart, that’s not who she was. She hoped Sidney would be ok, but for the two of them, their story was done. 

Later that evening, before dinner, Lady Denham, Charlotte and Esther were in the library discussing their plans for Christmas. 

“Babbers and I will be staying here until spring, then if it pleases you Aunt I would like to invite his parents here in time for the birth.” Esther asked Lady Denham. 

“Of course, I am pleased Esther that you have decided to stay and have your child here. And you Miss Heywood, I suspect you would like to go home and visit your parents for Christmas?” Lady Denham asked. 

“I would, although I am here at yours and Esther’s pleasure, I would not leave if I am truly needed.” Charlotte smiled. 

“I am sure that we can spare you to have time with your family and then you could return when the building starts up again. With the weather it will be a while before we can finish, however that young Mr Stringer wastes no time, he may surprise us all and have it done.” 

“Charlotte, I think it is important that you see your family but I would be very grateful if you would return to help with everything, I know that is a lot to ask but you really are part of the family here now, and as reluctant as Lady Denham would be to admit this, she has come to rely on you somewhat as have I, there would be many here that would miss you. However I would understand if you wished to stay with your family.” Esther said kindly. 

Charlotte asked for some time to think of her plans and would inform them as soon as she had made up her mind. The trio continued to talk when Lord Babington arrived home.   
“Good evening Ladies,” he said, but he only looked at Esther as he approached her and swept her up in to his arms. 

“I have missed you Lady Babington, I am glad to be home,” he said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. 

“How are the Parkers? Have they returned?” asked Lady Denham.

“Yes, I arrived with Tom, Mary and Georgiana. Diana and Arthur will arrive at the weeks end. Sidney has decided to remain in London, for how long I am not sure,” he answered Lady Denham whilst looking in Charlotte’s direction.

Charlotte smiled and lowered her head; she was not surprised, she knew that he would not yet be ready to return following such a tragedy. The four of them then proceeded into the dining hall, Lord Babington recalled details of the funeral and mentioned of a relative of Mrs Campions. He also said that Sidney was unsure of his plans or whether he planned on returning anytime soon. Babington was sure that it was just for appearances but the look on his face did not convince Charlotte that was the only reason. Dinner continued on with talk of plans for the baby’s arrival and then the subject changed to Charlotte’s plans once more. 

“Charlotte may be leaving us for a short while over Christmas but we are hoping that she returns after Christmas” Esther informed Babington. 

“Really Charlotte? Leaving so soon? Yes, well, I did not think of you returning home, that’s a new development”. Babington stuttered with Esther looking at him oddly. 

“Yes, I have not made any firm plans as of yet” Charlotte said. 

The dinner continued with further discussion of Christmas plans. Afterwards they all retired back to the library. 

“So, Mr Parker is remaining in London then? I have to say that I am a little surprised.” Lady Denham said looking at Charlotte. 

Charlotte smiled and continued to read her book. Babington rose from his chair and went to the desk and began to write. 

“Aunt, I think that the three of us should pay a visit to the Parker house tomorrow, it will be good for you to have some fresh air, and check on the building repairs. I also need to speak with Dr Fuchs,” said Esther trying to change the subject.

“I would very much like to see Georgiana and Mary tomorrow, and I also have some letters to send. Now if you will excuse me I am going to retire to my room. Goodnight all.” And with that Charlotte left the room. 

“Now that Charlotte has left the room, can you please tell me what on earth you are putting in that letter to Sidney?” Esther said to Babington.

“What, how did you know?” he said flustered. 

Esther looked at him and shook her head. 

“Really, you’re not exactly stealthy George. Here, let me see what you have written… is that it? Dear Sidney, Charlotte is leaving...this is what has taken you all this time?” Esther stifled her laughing and moved him from his seat. 

“Firstly, answer me this, why is Parker choosing to stay in London?” she turned to ask him. 

“I think he thinks it’s the most appropriate thing to do but I think there is something more to it but you know Sidney, he can be closed off at times.”

“A stubborn mule, if you ask me” interjected Lady Denham. 

Esther turned to write a letter to Sidney, enough was enough, it was time someone told that man exactly what he was doing wrong.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is Sidney going to do......

It had been a few days since everyone had returned to Sanditon and the house felt very quiet, Sidney found himself missing the noise and bustle of a full house. He had arranged for Arthur and Diana to come for dinner and stay at Bedford Place before they left tomorrow for Sanditon. 

He came downstairs to find a letter waiting for him with the Babington seal, when he opened it he was surprised to find it was from Esther Babington. 

“Dear Sidney, I hope this letter finds you well. Firstly, I wish to convey my condolences for the passing of Mrs Campion.   
I feel at this point I must be honest with you Parker, please stop wallowing in whatever pity that you think you deserve or have to portray to the rest of London society and come home. There are many people here that dare I say miss you, I know that my own dear Babington would benefit from having you near.   
There is however, one other person who you should consider, Charlotte. There has been time lost for both of you, and she has suffered enough at the hands of this wretched mess. I know that you will feel this is inappropriate, but if you are honest, those that know and love you, know of your real feelings to Mrs Campion and you have discharged your final duty to her admirably but you should care not for the gossip of the Ton, they matter not.   
Charlotte will depart for Willingden for Christmas shortly and I am unsure if she is to return. If you can honestly say that you do not care for her anymore then please stay in London until she leaves, if not then as I have said previously, come home.   
Your friend,   
Esther Babington”

Sidney stood there, not sure how to react to such honestly from Esther, yet he expected nothing less. At that moment Diana and Arthur arrived. 

“Hello brother, thank you for the invitation…Sidney are you ok you look quite shocked,” asked Diana. 

“Yes Diana, I am quite well, follow me, dinner is ready it seems,” he said distracted. 

Dinner was a quiet affair with Arthur expressing his joy at seeing their nephew and nieces, Diana was watching Sidney closely, who was agreeing at the appropriate times in the conversation but seemed to be wholly distracted. 

After dinner, Diana decided to ask Sidney what the matter was and he passed her the letter from Esther, they both read the contents and Arthur, being a faithful brother, said nothing regarding the fact that he knew Sidney was reluctant to go home to Charlotte, however Diana had something to say on the matter. 

“Well, she is right of course, if you stay here for no other reason than to satisfy people who do not care a jot for you then you are no better than the gossips, only interested in appearances…It is apparent to me that Charlotte is very important to you, I am not so ignorant as everyone seems to think Sidney…You have made sacrifices for this family that can never be measured but it is time to think of yourself, be selfish, be in love, for I imagine it is a wonderful feeling to find that person. If you do not I have a feeling you will spend another decade in regret because of Eliza Campion, and I do not wish to speak ill of the dead, however she is not worth that, not again. Please brother, come home,” Diana said looking directly at Sidney, giving him no chance to interject. 

Arthur smiled, and nodded his head in agreement. 

“What if...Arthur what if…?” Sidney asked his brother, struggling to get the words out.

Arthur knew exactly what his brother was trying to convey, “Charlotte loves you Sidney, it is about time you realise that,” he said kindly. 

Sidney smiled and excused himself to his room, he had opinions from everyone it seems. If he admitted the truth he was scared that after all of this time the hurt had become too much for her, that she would no longer want any part of him. Sidney was tired, more tired than he realised, he would think about this some more tomorrow, he just wanted to close his eyes and sleep. 

Sidney opened his eyes as the sun was coming up, he had dreamt of her last night, his favourite dream, the two of them sitting on the ground of their clifftop, his head resting on her legs. She was reading to him, her fingers laced through his hair. Sidney jumped up and out of bed. 

“Why the hell am I lying here dreaming about her.” And with that he got dressed in a hurry, the staff were surprised to see him up so early, he left instructions to pack his clothes and ensure they left with his siblings. He then told them to inform Diana and Arthur that he had left early to go home. 

Charlotte woke up early as usual, she had made her mind up to go home for Christmas and had not yet decided her future. She asked Esther for some time at home to think about this, Esther reluctantly agreed as she wanted her friend to return. Charlotte had written a letter to her parents to inform them of her plans, and after breakfast she collected all the other post and decided whilst it was dry to take a walk into town. 

Charlotte walked towards town and found herself wanting to go their spot, she liked to stand there sometimes and just remember that perfect day. Sometimes, she could hear him saying her name as if he was standing right next to her.

“Charlotte…” she closed her eyes, and then she heard it again...clearer as if he was standing behind her. 

“Charlotte…” she turned around and there he was, standing there looking at her, a weary, shy smile across his hopeful face. 

“You came home” she said, not moving from the spot. 

“You are my home” he replied.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> true love....

Charlotte stood there and she did not know what to say, part of her thought she was dreaming, she was too frightened that if she moved her dream would become the nightmare it had before, that he would disappear. 

“You are my home” he said, as he took a few tentative steps towards her. 

“I have no right to ask anything of you but your forgiveness,” he said gently.

“There is nothing to forgive, I told you that I do not think badly of you…I never could,” she said as she bowed her head. 

He moved closer to her…

“I thought that you were to remain in London?” she asked.

“I had thought to, but if I am honest, I was only staying because I thought that you might think ill of me if I returned so soon,” he said nervously. 

Charlotte looked confused... “Why would I?”

“I need to be honest with you, after Eliza died and the shock had subsided, the feeling that I had was one of relief. Relief at the fact that I would be free of the arrangement, relief that I could come back to you. I was ashamed and disgusted at myself because I knew that you would feel that way about me once you knew, but I need to be honest with you, there was never a moment when I haven’t wanted to be with you,” Sidney said. 

“I appreciate your honesty but now it is my turn. You’re not the only person who had feelings that they should not have had. All the time that we spent together before you left for London I was grateful for, even though you were promised to another. When I heard of Mrs Campion’s passing I immediately wanted to be with you, to comfort you. I had contemplated writing to you but I could not fathom the appropriate words to say. So, I do not think badly of you.” Charlotte said honestly. 

Sidney smiled at Charlotte, they had been through so much and here they were standing opposite each other, no obstacles in their way. 

“I received a letter from Esther that said you were leaving for Willingden, is that true?” 

“I am returning home for Christmas, I have missed my family. I made the decision when I thought you were still away,” she said bowing her head again. 

Sidney took another step closer to her, he placed his hand under her chin and raised her head to look at him. Those big brown eyes stared right back at him. 

“Charlotte Heywood, I told you once that I was my best self when I am with you, the truth is I am my whole self. There has never been a person that has made me feel so complete, never been a person so willing to accept every part of me, even the ugly parts. There has not been one moment since the day that you left that I have not thought about you, or wanted to be with you. When you returned I was so happy, happy to have stolen moments, to see your face, to speak with you. I only hope that you still feel something for me,” he said looking at her hopefully. 

She smiled as she looked him. 

“Charlotte…I love you.”

Charlotte did not answer straight away, her mind trying to process the words, and the fact that Sidney was standing in front of her, saying the words she wanted to hear.   
Sidney desperately searched her face for a reaction, she looked at him and smiled. 

“I love you too” 

And with that Sidney pulled her to him and held her tight, worried that she might slip away. Charlotte raised her head from his shoulder, they looked at one another, Sidney lowered his head to hers, his eyes never leaving her mouth. Charlotte closed her eyes, and then she felt Sidney’s lips on hers. At first it was light, gentle and then with each moment and action the kiss became deeper, more urgent, Charlotte melted into his arms. The kiss seemed to go on forever, both reluctant to be the one to stop. 

Sidney held on to Charlotte tightly as he kissed her, he was sure that if he did not his legs would have betrayed him. His arms pulling her in tighter and tighter. This was the place he wanted to be, the place he dreamed of every night. Eventually they broke their kiss, Charlotte looked at Sidney, he was smiling as he looked at her. 

“Well Mr Parker, I do believe if we stand here much longer then someone is bound to come across us.” 

“Let them” he growled as he lent back down to kiss her again. 

Charlotte laughed and stepped back slightly. 

“You will need to let your family know that you have returned, and there are building business to attend to.” She said giggling when she realised all he was doing was staring at her lips. 

“My family have seen enough of me and the building is not going anywhere, they can all wait.” He kissed her again. 

Charlotte, being the sensible one stepped back and pointed towards town, after a moan Sidney conceded that it was probably the best thing to do. He held his arm out to her and noticed her hesitation. 

“I promise to release you before we reach the town, I know that we will need to act appropriately for a while but I promise you this Charlotte, I will be appropriate for the shortest time. Now reluctantly let us be on our way.” He said as he held he arm out once more. 

They walked together to the edge of town, they talked of details that Sidney missed whilst he was away. As they approached the small alley way Charlotte dropped her arm out of his grasp, and walked in front of him. He watched as she moved, her hair resting on her shoulders, the wind catching her dress. He wanted to spend the rest of the day looking at her, holding her, kissing her. 

Charlotte turned to Sidney ….

“Why are you smiling?” she said.

“Because of you” he gently whispered in her ear as he walked past. 

Charlotte informed Sidney she needed to post her letters and he should make his way to Trafalgar House, he raised his eyebrow to state that he would wait outside and they would go together. As he waited outside he felt happier than he had ever felt, Charlotte Heywood loved him and he would never need anymore than that. 

They made their way to Trafalgar House, Charlotte felt strange before they entered, they had not discussed what they planned to tell everyone. Sidney secretly gave her hand once last squeeze before they entered the house, and they were greeted by Henry who was very happy to see his uncle had returned.

“Uncle Sidney is here, Uncle Sidney is here, and Charlotte is with him.” He shouted to everyone in the house. 

At that moment both Tom, Mary and Georgiana came into view. 

“Sidney, I am so happy you decided to come home, Oh and Charlotte is with you with how wonderful” said Mary. 

“Well met everyone, “ he said as he picked up Henry and swung him around. 

“Yes, I ran into Miss Heywood in the street, both of us heading to the house” Sidney stuttered, unsure of what to say. 

“Yes, yes I was quite surprised to see Mr Parker, I was at the Post Office, posting letters” said Charlotte. 

Georgiana looked to Charlotte as she mumbled her excuse and then looked to Sidney, gave them both a sly smile and walked back into the office.   
“Come, come both of you “ said Tom ushering them both in. 

Tom and Sidney went straight to business, discussing the dates in which the buiding work would have to be halted. Mary and Georgiana asked Charlotte to accompany them in to the parlour. As soon as they were alone, both of them stood there looking at Charlotte. 

“Is everything alright?” Charlotte asked innocently. 

“Well considering you cheeks are flushed and you have a very huge smile on your face, I would say that all is well” said Georgiana.

“Yes, well, I am happy that Mr Parker has returned and that he seems well.” 

Mary and Georgiana looked at one another and then to Charlotte. Then Mary walked forward and embraced her. Charlotte was happy that they did not press her any further, as at the moment she had no answers for anyone, she just wanted to enjoy this time together. Tom and Sidney joined them and they all sat and had some tea, discussing plans for Christmas. Sidney mentioned that he was in such a hurry this morning that he did not have a chance to speak with Arthur and Diana. 

“Well, I must really go and see Lady Denham and let her know that I am returned. I would also like to see Babington.” Sidney said standing up. 

“I am sure she will be very happy to see you. Also I believe Charlotte is heading back that way, how fortunate that you can now accompany her.” Georgiana said smiling at Sidney.   
“Yes, thank you Georgiana. Miss Heywoood if you are ready I am happy to walk with you” he said trying to not be obvious. 

“Thank you Mr Parker, I should be getting back. It is so nice to have you all back. Georgiana, Mary I will call on you again tomorrow.” And with that Charlotte and Sidney left Trafalgar House. 

They decided to walk along the sea front, Sidney offered his arm to her which this time she took with no hesitation. 

“Are you cold, would you like my coat” he asked her. 

“No thank you, I am quite warm” she said leaning into his arm. 

“I think Georgiana may suspect something” 

“She does not suspect she knows and so does Mary, although they did not say in so many words.” She said laughing. 

“I suppose there will be no point in trying to hide anything from Lady Denham or Esther. Charlotte, I do not care who knows how I feel about you but I would hate for anyone to gossip about you or our relationship so soon after my previous one. If I could I would…” he said before Charlotte stopped and interrupted him. 

“I am happy to wait, it would be nice for it to be just us at the moment. Everything we have been through since we met, has happened so fast there has been very little time for us to get to know each other properly. I am looking forward to you wooing me Mr Sidney Parker” she said smiling at him. 

“I like it when you say my name, when you say Mr Parker I have visions of Tom” he shuddered. 

“Sidney, Sidney Parker…”she said teasingly. 

Sidney looked around to ensure that no one was watching them, then picked her up and twirled her around and planted a kiss as he set her down. 

“If you expect me to behave then I suggest you go back to calling me Mr Parker.”


End file.
